Is it normal i cant figure out my feelings or sexuality?
I've had one big love and it was in high school. After it ended with him I began questioning my sexuality. I then met a new guy and it didnt last,after we broke up we hung out and he used to "joke" with me that i'm a lesbian even my mom has suggested to me that maybe i'm more into women...
I've had 3 crushes on women, not counting celebrities. It never feels right to kiss a man even if it's one I am attracted to and he kisses me I just feel kinda "ew" and then I start losing interest romantically. This even happened with my ex but I stayed and tried to fight it. With my first love it didnt happen, hes the exception.
I have a hard time getting close to other women tho. They seem so hard to talk to it's like they talk a different language it also seems when I do get along with one eventually the feelings change to more than friendship for me... 😶
I only have male friends. I love them they are the coolest dudes I can talk to them about anything. I have tried to fall in love with 2 of them but I felt nothing. It felt for me so forced and wrong like with all other men.
I feel melancholic tho when I think of possibly being into women. In my mind I all my life have romanticized the norm traditional man-woman relationship and wanted it.
Can anyone relate to this? I am in my mid 20s almost.