Is it normal i’m getting a strong attachment to an online friend of mine?

57% Normal
3 Comments

It would take a long while to explain every detail, so here’s a quick summary:

In 2016, when I was 17, I started talking to a 14 year old girl online. We met on yahoo answers and then branched out to email and kik, and eventually I told my mom about her. She told me to be careful and not talk inappropriately to her, and I assured her it wasn’t like that.

Somewhere down the line I saw she was posting questions about her abusive father and having suicidal thoughts on yahoo answers, and I reached out to her the best I could. Throughout this time she would have multiple suicide attempts that would have her end up in the hospital, but thankfully she survived all of them. We would text once in a while, and eventually some time either earlier this year or late last year, I confessed that I was having romantic feelings about her.

She was kind about it, and she said that it was more the long distance rather than the age gap that she felt was an obstacle, and she thanked me for being honest. It was in March of this year I believe where we had our last conversation, and she basically said she would no longer have time to have long conversations with me. I actually messaged her on Instagram a few days ago, but she hasn’t responded.

It’s kinda out of nowhere, but I’m starting to think about her again (and before anyone asks, she had her 18th birthday a little over a month ago, so it’s fine). I just want to give her the love that seemed to be absent from her life. This may be creepy, but sometimes when I’m sleeping I imagine my head is on her lap, or that the stuffed animal I’m hugging (and yes I still sleep with stuffed animals don’t judge!) is actually her, and that we’re having an intimate moment full of love.

Maybe I’m just a helpless romantic. After all, we first met because we were writers and wanted to help each other out, and maybe I get too caught up in my own fantasies some times. I really hope I can meet her in person some day, and that we can have this sort of connection, because deep within me I feel it’s there. But sadly, reality does not offen match fantasy, but I can dream.....

Voting Results
57% Normal
Based on 7 votes (4 yes)
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Comments ( 3 )
  • xxLucifer
    4 years ago

    You talk to someone enough and you have things in common then I think it's completely normal to start to develop feelings. 3 years age difference isn't that big of a deal, in my opinion. Just like any relationship though she may not have felt the same way and decided it was best to talk to you less instead of unintentionally leading you on. It's probably best for you to try to move on.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      4 years ago

      It wasn’t exactly three years. If we’re going to be precise, she was 2 years, 7 months, and 5 days younger than me. That’s the kind of issue you run into when someone’s birthday is later in the year.

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  • bigbudchonga
    4 years ago

    You need someone you speak to face to face. You're feeling attraction to a girl, but the situation is untenable. She knows it, and not to kick you when you're down, but she probably talks to guys she sees face to face and lives close to, and she does so because that's the natural way to find companionship.

    These feelings will almost certainly fade away if you have a more viable chance for a romantic relationship with someone you actually meet and have personal contact with.

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