I'm surprised you still want to have him as a friend at all, let alone have hope that he will want to eventually do normal activities with you.
Are you the only friend he takes photos of or are there others? If he does it with everyone then maybe it's a hobby and not nearly as creepy as it sounds in your story.
Well, he clearly stated the act makes him uncomfortable and this "friend" of his, shows no regard for his comfort OR privacy. If someone tells another person, stop/you're making me uncomfortable, then fails to stop and continues to force their own obsessive behavior on the person, it's definitely "odd", creepy and not normal. He has a multitude of images, taken secretly, has him as a screen saver and shows up, to the reluctance of the OP.
This is harassment and borderline stalking behavior. I would consider really telling him to back off, as he sounds obsessed with you. This is probably sexual, for him. Unless you are interested in him progressing this matter into something you really do not want, I would suggest spending time a part, if he continues, you may need to get a restraining order, as you don't know what he is doing with or to, your images. Showing up unexpected and not caring how you feel about it, also very telling of his intentions. Men taking pictures of people without consent and failing to stop, knowing you know about it and are uncomfortable, definitely is not a normal thing to do and shows a lack of acknowledgment; right vs wrong, normal vs abnormal behavior. He seems like a stalker, who is just getting started.
He does this with other people? That makes everything a touch different. But doesn't exclude this form of fasciation with you, specifically, or others.
He doesn't sound mentally stable; But mentioning he HAS been institutionalized, this could become increasingly dangerous. If he fixates on someone, in a prying manner, obviously it can only become more of a problem for himself, as he is evidently not stable enough to control urges. This could be how he gets off, for now. But a mentally unstable person, will only find more ways to fill an urge/desire, to reach the same effect/satisfaction, level. If it is male-specific, he could be attracted to men and struggling with that. Even if not, he has two recipes for disaster: mental health issues and a fixation; you're allowing too much leniency with things, thus far. If things escalate, you could have a real problem on your hands. He could hurt you, himself, or someone else, someday.
It's not fair to him, if someone knows his situation and will not work with some type of therapies, or get to the bottom of what his intentions are. I know it sounds "dramatic", but in actuality it is not. People who commit crimes of "passion" all started somewhere, with someone underestimating the nature of fixation and compulsions of someone struggling with mental health issues. It might not seem "wrong", the act of what he is doing; it is the nature behind his action(s), obsessive behavior, fixation, showing up with no notice, pictures being taken everyday (the prying nature of how they are taken) through the screen/window/under legs, that alone is disconcerting; adding the element of not being mentally stable. That is something to take action over, soon.
IIN for a man to secretly take pictures of another man... everyday?.
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I'm surprised you still want to have him as a friend at all, let alone have hope that he will want to eventually do normal activities with you.
Are you the only friend he takes photos of or are there others? If he does it with everyone then maybe it's a hobby and not nearly as creepy as it sounds in your story.
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RealWord
9 years ago
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Well, he clearly stated the act makes him uncomfortable and this "friend" of his, shows no regard for his comfort OR privacy. If someone tells another person, stop/you're making me uncomfortable, then fails to stop and continues to force their own obsessive behavior on the person, it's definitely "odd", creepy and not normal. He has a multitude of images, taken secretly, has him as a screen saver and shows up, to the reluctance of the OP.
This is harassment and borderline stalking behavior. I would consider really telling him to back off, as he sounds obsessed with you. This is probably sexual, for him. Unless you are interested in him progressing this matter into something you really do not want, I would suggest spending time a part, if he continues, you may need to get a restraining order, as you don't know what he is doing with or to, your images. Showing up unexpected and not caring how you feel about it, also very telling of his intentions. Men taking pictures of people without consent and failing to stop, knowing you know about it and are uncomfortable, definitely is not a normal thing to do and shows a lack of acknowledgment; right vs wrong, normal vs abnormal behavior. He seems like a stalker, who is just getting started.
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I honestly don't feel he believes he's doing anything wrong. I often question his mental stability.
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RealWord
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He does this with other people? That makes everything a touch different. But doesn't exclude this form of fasciation with you, specifically, or others.
He doesn't sound mentally stable; But mentioning he HAS been institutionalized, this could become increasingly dangerous. If he fixates on someone, in a prying manner, obviously it can only become more of a problem for himself, as he is evidently not stable enough to control urges. This could be how he gets off, for now. But a mentally unstable person, will only find more ways to fill an urge/desire, to reach the same effect/satisfaction, level. If it is male-specific, he could be attracted to men and struggling with that. Even if not, he has two recipes for disaster: mental health issues and a fixation; you're allowing too much leniency with things, thus far. If things escalate, you could have a real problem on your hands. He could hurt you, himself, or someone else, someday.
It's not fair to him, if someone knows his situation and will not work with some type of therapies, or get to the bottom of what his intentions are. I know it sounds "dramatic", but in actuality it is not. People who commit crimes of "passion" all started somewhere, with someone underestimating the nature of fixation and compulsions of someone struggling with mental health issues. It might not seem "wrong", the act of what he is doing; it is the nature behind his action(s), obsessive behavior, fixation, showing up with no notice, pictures being taken everyday (the prying nature of how they are taken) through the screen/window/under legs, that alone is disconcerting; adding the element of not being mentally stable. That is something to take action over, soon.