I have a very deep, mutually loving relationship with my boyfriend, he has been honest with me and told me that he has cheated on previous girlfriends in the past. He said that he did it because he wasn't truly committed to the relationships so in a way saw no reason not to. We had a discussion about infidelity and he told me about when he told his previous girlfriend he had cheated on her - he told her it was a drunken mistake, and she asked him, if you were that drunk, how could you get it up and go through with it? And he said he realised that she was right - in that moment he had known what he was doing and he had made the decision to cheat because he didn't care enough about his girlfriend not to. After that, he cheated again because she forgave him, so again, there was no reason not to.
So that's coming from the mouth of an ex-cheater - there is no excuse for infidelity. In that moment you are deciding you care more about fucking someone else than you do about your partner. Alcohol doesn't excuse it, relationship problems don't excuse it. If you forgive, you're essentially condoning it.
Sometimes I find it hard to trust my boyfriend because of his past, but I remind myself that every person is just responding to circumstance at any given point in their lives. If he was ever unfaithful, we'd both know he was no longer committed to the relationship, and walk away.
If your boy/girlfriend cheated, would you give them another chance
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No.
I have a very deep, mutually loving relationship with my boyfriend, he has been honest with me and told me that he has cheated on previous girlfriends in the past. He said that he did it because he wasn't truly committed to the relationships so in a way saw no reason not to. We had a discussion about infidelity and he told me about when he told his previous girlfriend he had cheated on her - he told her it was a drunken mistake, and she asked him, if you were that drunk, how could you get it up and go through with it? And he said he realised that she was right - in that moment he had known what he was doing and he had made the decision to cheat because he didn't care enough about his girlfriend not to. After that, he cheated again because she forgave him, so again, there was no reason not to.
So that's coming from the mouth of an ex-cheater - there is no excuse for infidelity. In that moment you are deciding you care more about fucking someone else than you do about your partner. Alcohol doesn't excuse it, relationship problems don't excuse it. If you forgive, you're essentially condoning it.
Sometimes I find it hard to trust my boyfriend because of his past, but I remind myself that every person is just responding to circumstance at any given point in their lives. If he was ever unfaithful, we'd both know he was no longer committed to the relationship, and walk away.