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Well im confused you see! I have the notion that its not good to hold onto things and let it go. Lifes too short, right! With having said that, I also get the impression that it makes one a push over if ur continuously forgiving everything and anything from trivial issues-major ones. So my question is that if u follow the quote that "lifes too short" and basically not hold grudges does that kinda make u a door mat??
I don't think that you can make a statement like "Not holding grudges makes you a door mat".
I try not to hold grudges. Instead I attempt to evaluate people's actions from an omniscient, bird's-eye perspective. If they abuse my kindness, I just - without a warning - cut off all ties with them. I am not mad at them, they just aren't a part of my life anymore.
Does that make one a door mat? I don't know.
It doesn't make you a doormat, it makes you wise. Not holding a grudge isn't for their benefit, it's for yours. By harboring resentment you are compromising your emotional integrity. Why allow someone to rent that space in your head? Ever hear the saying that resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die? Don't permit the offender to hold your psyche hostage. Now, I am not saying that you should continue to associate, depending on the nature of the offense, with that person. To immediately ignore all transgressions is being a doormat. If you feel you've been wronged severely enough then sever all ties. If it's a minor aberration of their behavior then forgive but do not forget.