I wish i didn't start it

I am currently labeled as the best student of my batch, many club moderators are asking me to join them, teachers want to sign me up on different competitions, both inside and outside school, and most students know me both by name and face. But the thing is, I don't actually think that I'm 'that' smart. I hate all the attention. I was used to being the invisible kid until senior. I mean, I was really enjoying my current school until people started recognizing me and even comparing to other students, above or below me. They started having these expectations that only made me feel like a prisoner. There are so many things that are happening and my mental state, being unstable for 4 years now, can't hold them. I'm feeling like shit and I feel myself slipping back to depression and anxiety. I can't afford professional help either so i'm really struggling with myself.