I wish for physical suffering is it normal?

31% Normal
13 Comments

I'm almost 20 years old. My girlfriend and I are expecting our baby girl to be born in November. Things should be great right? Truth is, they arent. I feel no one sees my pain, my girlfriend doesnt understand it. I can't explain it to her. I have been hospitalized in the past due to suicidal attempts. Now, its not death that I wish for. Let's say I'm walking down the road, and a car slams into me, breaking my back and paralyzing me. Dream come true. My theory as to why I hope for such a thing is that maybe it will mask my emotional pain and give my brain a new focus. There is much more to the story, i just have a hard time explaining. I just want help that seems impossible for anyone to give. Feeling hopeless at the moment.

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Comments ( 13 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • LaMer
    11 years ago | pl

    I've had similar feelings in the past and it was all wrapped up in my depression. I agree with the other commenters that suggested you should talk to a professional. I wish you the best of luck.

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  • FocoUS
    11 years ago | pl

    Well clearly it's not normal and you know that. You said you wanted to get hurt to take your brain off the emotional pain. Your distraction doesn't need to be more pain. It could be anything, it could be a healthy hobby. You could also face the problem instead of distracting yourself from it, but that would most likely require professional help and anti depressant medication.

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  • VioletTrees
    11 years ago | pl

    For me, imagining being injured by accident has often been a precursor to thoughts and plans of suicide. You should take these thoughts seriously. Get help as soon as you can. You deserve to get better.

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  • Anon_123
    11 years ago | pl

    Its not crazy to think and I believe I have felt similar at times. I recon there is a Phycological reason for thinking this way which I feel you should address soon, especially as you have a kid on the way. If you want pain, have no fear, Soon you will have parenthood.

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  • 800imawesome
    11 years ago | pl

    Masochism.

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  • Scarlettfox
    11 years ago | pl

    I said normal because it's normal for me. I used to have suicidal ideations and I self harm still. I used to wish every day that I would get seriously injured or perhaps die by means other than actually killing myself. Just a simple car accident. Now I've been on antidepressants for a while, I don't wish for death as often, but I do wish for pain. It makes things easier to deal with because it's easy to focus on pain and just pain. And I find it a good way of releasing pent up anger and stress.

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  • Fanayvea
    11 years ago | pl

    maybe your brain seeks clarity.

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    • VioletTrees
      11 years ago | pl

      This seems like a really bad time to glorify serious injury.

      Pain doesn't clear your mind. It fogs it. It doesn't make life simple, it doesn't make you realise what's really important, it just sucks. I'm not trying to shame the OP, mind. In fact, I've dealt with thoughts like this myself. It's a sign of depression that should be taken very seriously, though.

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    • UhhhOK
      11 years ago | pl

      Wow, good answer

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  • Terence_the_viking
    10 years ago | pl

    Go and hammer your face

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