I found this article while I was searching to answers for a very similar issue. My best friend raped me too and I froze and did nothing. I have since learnt that the flight / fight / freeze is a very common reaction and nothing to be ashamed of. He did something against my will and it was horrible. I forgave him over time, which I needed as much for myself as for him. I can now remember all the good times we had that were filled with love(of the friendship kind, not sexual). I want to reconnect with him and part of me feels that is ridiculous, the other part misses him terribly. Yes, he did something bad AND he also did lots of things good too. I'm confused by it all.
It was, however, rape. No getting round that. This article explains it very well....http://www.theloop.ca/this-woman-just-explained-consent-with-the-most-perfect-metaphor/
Only you can decide what to do but please don't ever think it was your fault or wasn't rape. And don't ever put yourself in that situation with him again.
I want to forgive and reconnect with a friend who raped me.
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I found this article while I was searching to answers for a very similar issue. My best friend raped me too and I froze and did nothing. I have since learnt that the flight / fight / freeze is a very common reaction and nothing to be ashamed of. He did something against my will and it was horrible. I forgave him over time, which I needed as much for myself as for him. I can now remember all the good times we had that were filled with love(of the friendship kind, not sexual). I want to reconnect with him and part of me feels that is ridiculous, the other part misses him terribly. Yes, he did something bad AND he also did lots of things good too. I'm confused by it all.
It was, however, rape. No getting round that. This article explains it very well....http://www.theloop.ca/this-woman-just-explained-consent-with-the-most-perfect-metaphor/
Only you can decide what to do but please don't ever think it was your fault or wasn't rape. And don't ever put yourself in that situation with him again.