dowhatyoudo, "I never fought him, but I said "no" a couple of times and I asked him to stop. At first I liked it though, that's why I wasn't fighting, and I did not respond as well, because he was my best friend and it just didn't seem right to have sex. I thought we would both feel awkward afterwards."
You should have mentioned that you told him 'no' and asked him to stop.
Your original post made it sound like you allowed it to happen without any resistance verbal or otherwise.
A friendship with someone who clearly has romantic and sexual feelings towards you they can't control isn't healthy. Unreciprocated feelings create frustration and heartbreak.
So I'd say forgive him if you want, but maintain a safe distance from him - allow him to move on. Don't risk getting close enough to him in private (especially if he's drunk) for something like this to happen again.
So, you liked the kissing but you didnt want it to go as far as it did. If he's remorseful than i can only assume you told him he went too far. The question now lies on you on what kind of friend you want to be.
Whether or not you want or welcome a more intimate relationship with this guy i boil it down to one point. What if he gets down in life again and what if he decides to drink again, and what will he do?
Maybe you dont want to ditch him because, you're the best friend he's got, and he's in love with you!
Unless you tell him you love him and want to get married, i can only see him as the guy who will always be jealous that you are with someone else. And god forbid he comes over to your house drunk one night with your husband out of town and kids asleep.
I want to forgive and reconnect with a friend who raped me.
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dowhatyoudo, "I never fought him, but I said "no" a couple of times and I asked him to stop. At first I liked it though, that's why I wasn't fighting, and I did not respond as well, because he was my best friend and it just didn't seem right to have sex. I thought we would both feel awkward afterwards."
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disthing
9 years ago
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ucipher8
9 years ago
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You should have mentioned that you told him 'no' and asked him to stop.
Your original post made it sound like you allowed it to happen without any resistance verbal or otherwise.
A friendship with someone who clearly has romantic and sexual feelings towards you they can't control isn't healthy. Unreciprocated feelings create frustration and heartbreak.
So I'd say forgive him if you want, but maintain a safe distance from him - allow him to move on. Don't risk getting close enough to him in private (especially if he's drunk) for something like this to happen again.
So, you liked the kissing but you didnt want it to go as far as it did. If he's remorseful than i can only assume you told him he went too far. The question now lies on you on what kind of friend you want to be.
Whether or not you want or welcome a more intimate relationship with this guy i boil it down to one point. What if he gets down in life again and what if he decides to drink again, and what will he do?
Maybe you dont want to ditch him because, you're the best friend he's got, and he's in love with you!
Unless you tell him you love him and want to get married, i can only see him as the guy who will always be jealous that you are with someone else. And god forbid he comes over to your house drunk one night with your husband out of town and kids asleep.
We need to legalize marijuana.
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[Old Memory]
9 years ago
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for real. when have you heard of a stoned guy raping somebody