Those feelings are totally normal. I've always been socially awkward. In college I tried to make myself talk to someone new every day. It's very hard and doesn't always go well, but getting practice pushing yourself out of your comfort zone can help.
I've learned that some social interactions tend to be more rewarding than others. Parties really don't do it for me. I might go to a conference though. Consider attending local Meetups or going to Toastmasters. Unless you have an excellent rapport with the servers, going out to restaurants alone tends to just feel awkward.
Do really think about seeing a therapist! Better to have a professional advise you than us.
Getting a job would also be good for you, emotionally and financially.
Fingers crossed for you! It can be challenging, but it will be worth it.
I torture myself by going out
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Those feelings are totally normal. I've always been socially awkward. In college I tried to make myself talk to someone new every day. It's very hard and doesn't always go well, but getting practice pushing yourself out of your comfort zone can help.
I've learned that some social interactions tend to be more rewarding than others. Parties really don't do it for me. I might go to a conference though. Consider attending local Meetups or going to Toastmasters. Unless you have an excellent rapport with the servers, going out to restaurants alone tends to just feel awkward.
Do really think about seeing a therapist! Better to have a professional advise you than us.
Getting a job would also be good for you, emotionally and financially.
Fingers crossed for you! It can be challenging, but it will be worth it.