I stopped having sex with my wife... and...

Now all I do it masturbate to videos of her having sex with other men. It's like porn for me but HYPER arousing. The pleasure I get from maturbating to these videos unfortunately have put me in the bathroom more frequently than the bedroom, for a few years now, which I think kinda really sucks, but at the same time I can't help it. Once I hit play I get so aroused my hands start to shake and I wind up a sweaty hot mess by the time it's over thinking "Holy s! That was HOT!!". Actual sex has become something that I wish could be a fantasy satisfyer, but instead is actually void of any of the fantasy that watching a hot video and masturbating includes. This question is very similar to all the "is it normal I prefer porn over sex" questions except that the porn in is case is specifically of my wife who used to be a pornstar, although I have videos of her with non industry aquaintences which by far are my favorites. A lot of times I'm the one filming it. Other porn doesn't have the same effect, it needs to be a guy doing my wife, at least to finnish up with ;)

She has her share of sex which not only am I alright with but I think it's hot, so I'm not worried that she's not getting any if we don't have sex, but I think that after being together for 19 years (We're 35 btw, been together for more that half our lives) it kinda sucks that now we're just superfriend partners, but no longer love makers. Any thoughts? Btw she's SUPER hot so that's not the problem.

Totally normal. 8
Not normal but I toally get it. 11
50/50 5
Weird but I could picture it a little. 12
Completely out there. 26
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Comments ( 13 )
  • BlackyHancock

    So the question is, what is stopping you from actually having sex with your wife?

    You say she's hot and she's 35 (that's when a woman is at her peak I think)

    Do you not have desire for her? or does she dot have desire for you (or perhaps both)?

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    • srotoys

      I'd have sex with her and I don't even know her --- videos can be great, I get that but they don't replace the just enhance.

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    • theAnomilyGuy

      It's just that actual sex lacks fantasy, while masturbation is all about fantasy, you can imagine anything to be what ever you want it to be. Sex feels more restricted to the things you can imagine, and when I'm imagining at that moment it's of her porn, so I wind up always watching the porn instead to get a more concetrated form of it than imagining about it during sex. And like I said, we've been together for over 19 years, and we're still young. I think there are a lot of times that married couples eventually stop having sex, partly due to all the mystery being long gone. But I just wish I wasn't already going through that stage at age 35. Oh and yes, I very much still have desire for her, but then thats why I love her videos so much.

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      • BlackyHancock

        Maybe you need to both change your surroundings and routine. A vacation together might help. Even something really different like a camping trip in the woods.
        I have found that the depth of intimacy and desire for each other is very much related to how much you love each other, especially in a long term relationship to keep that spark alive.

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  • Poes

    Well your post has got me thinking...I could come over to your place and fuck your wife whilst you masturbate to us fucking!

    Hell i will even let you lick my balls whilst I am grinding away at your Missus`s tight pussy!

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    • theAnomilyGuy

      FINALLY! No j/k :P

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  • Hergayhubby

    Hi fellow cuckold

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    • theAnomilyGuy

      The word "cuckhold" offends me a little, but most of all I feel sorry that you're in a situation making you call yourself that. That. Really. Sucks. But for the mostpart I'm good on actual sex, I used to be a performer myself, and since my wife is also into women and women are into her, every now and then she'll bring home a treat, drunk as f*** from a shoot or some girl she met at the bar for a threesome. Good times. I just wish I would have more sex with my wife just so that I know she doesn't feel like she's lacking it from me specifically as her husband.

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      • Anonnet

        I'm actually really surprised that the word offends you, since it sounds like you're fitting the description.

        All I can suggest, not being in that situation, is to just exercise some self-control. Stop watching the videos and stop filming them, and the desire will come back on it's own.

        Does she get off to you, or is it just you getting off to her? If it's one-sided, I can see why you would be worried.

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        • theAnomilyGuy

          I'm sorry, the reason I said that word offends me is because my wife is not the only one having sex with other people, so there's no need to feel sorry for me in that respect. But I didn't mention that earlier so I can totally understand how it would really look like this is a cuckold relationship. I just prefer the word "open" to "cuckold".

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  • xfg14

    For a while, I got into a habit of masturbating into wigs I made from real ladies hair. The fresh smell of conditioner aroused me the most. Then, I got bored and tried something else. If it's what you like, then what's the problem?

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    • theAnomilyGuy

      Well it's just that I feel like sex is important to a relationship. It's still her that I always cum to but we're not doing it together, like we once did, and I wanna bring that back. I mean, what if also one day she decides "he doesn't even f*** me anymore, I'm going with a guy that does.", the thought that more or less made me write the post. And btw, the smell of conditioner on a freshly showered woman is incredible. Good call on the human hair! :P

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  • theAnomilyGuy

    Btw, I just realized I'm not interested in whether this is weird or not, I know it's unusual. I don't care about that since we are who we are and it actually works, better than I see other relationships working. What I'm more seeking is if anyone has gone through a similar experience (even of course not exact) and if anyone has any advice on how to crave having sex with my wife more often and getting out of the habbit of watching videos of her rather than actually doing her. I know sounds stupid but I'm really stuck, please help.

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