As far as I have dealt with my issues in life, I have been suicidal, and have dealt with depression. When I was in the Navy I was sexually assaulted by my "boss". When I and another victim went to others to report it we we're told "he's being transferred in a couple weeks". So I felt it was being swept under the rug. I went to the VA, and it was kinda the same. So for 30 years I have fought with drugs, thoughts of suicide, depression, been unable to maintain jobs because of the said depression. I would really suggest talking to your family doctor. It sounds to me like maybe being a teen, and society these days I think you are struggling back and forth with depression and or bipolar depression. I was on antidepressants for a few years. They did help alot. You didn't say where you live, but in the States, if you can get to a local County mental health dept. they can probably help or point you in right direction. The biggest thing I would say is don't hold it in, talk to parents. They need to ensure you can get whatever help you might need. They may not want to hear it, but wouldn't that be better than you feeling afraid to talk to them and then you would do like I did and turn to drugs to help me forget the depression I was struggling with. I also struggled with things because at age 13 I realized I was a crossdresser. Society is not anywhere near ready yet to accept guys that crossdress in private or public.
I need some adult help
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As far as I have dealt with my issues in life, I have been suicidal, and have dealt with depression. When I was in the Navy I was sexually assaulted by my "boss". When I and another victim went to others to report it we we're told "he's being transferred in a couple weeks". So I felt it was being swept under the rug. I went to the VA, and it was kinda the same. So for 30 years I have fought with drugs, thoughts of suicide, depression, been unable to maintain jobs because of the said depression. I would really suggest talking to your family doctor. It sounds to me like maybe being a teen, and society these days I think you are struggling back and forth with depression and or bipolar depression. I was on antidepressants for a few years. They did help alot. You didn't say where you live, but in the States, if you can get to a local County mental health dept. they can probably help or point you in right direction. The biggest thing I would say is don't hold it in, talk to parents. They need to ensure you can get whatever help you might need. They may not want to hear it, but wouldn't that be better than you feeling afraid to talk to them and then you would do like I did and turn to drugs to help me forget the depression I was struggling with. I also struggled with things because at age 13 I realized I was a crossdresser. Society is not anywhere near ready yet to accept guys that crossdress in private or public.