You must be hurting a lot right now. You've clearly invested a lot of yourself in this relationship - and I can see that you want to find a way to work it out. That is a very wonderful quality that you have.
I'm about to say what I think, and I really hope that you think about what I'm saying to you. Try not to write it off because it may not be what you were hoping to hear. I have been in your position, swear to god. I think the position you're in is not something to be taken lightly. I mean both in the terms of the state of the relationship, and also that you said it makes you want to kill yourself. (Please don't do that - I promise you that things always get better - seriously, always - I've been there.)
1. I don't think you should feel like a crazy person. There is a legitimate reason that you are feeling alone, ignored, unloved, and ill-treated. It's because you are. He is spending less and less time with you, leaving you out when friends get together, not enjoying the things you two used to enjoy doing together, and above all, physically hurting you. You feel badly because someone you love is treating you badly - it makes a lot of sense.
2. Though it may have started as a perfect relationship - it is an abusive relationship as of now. Not only physically, but from what I can gather, more emotionally abusive than anything else. You are giving everything you have to this relationship and what you are getting back is very, very negative.
3. I do not think you should stay with this person. I think you will be able to find someone who appreciates you more every day. I don't think you should marry someone who causes you to even utter the words "I want to kill myself" - even if you know in your heart that you wouldn't do it. I think you should find someone better for you.
Keep your heart open to someone who will work out conflicts with you openly, never make fun of you in front of his friends, and most importantly make you feel loved.
Thank you very much, your point of view regarding my relationship touched me deeply. I do understand what you say is true, it is practical..but above all that I have some obligations too. That is why I'm seeking help to get things back to normal, there might be a way i just wish!
I'm very emotional person,I have the urge to feel secured because of my childhood experiences,my parents had always been very violent at each other and as a kid i didn't have the best time. I found a lot of faith in my boyfriend for the past few years before all this emotional turmoil began.I am deeply attached to him,It will not be possible for me to forget him, there are too many reasons, you might see I am obsessed but i wont call my love for him is an obsession.
Secondly I live in a country where culture rule. Simply saying a virgin is the best choice for marriage if not then her married life will be a living hell.I cant move on because of this reason.More over I don't have many friends to talk about this, and i keep bottling up.I am glad I found this site, at least I got some decent replies. I may sound stupid but I don't want to be left alone all my life without him.
I need help to understand the status of my relationship ?
← View full post
Hi sweetheart,
You must be hurting a lot right now. You've clearly invested a lot of yourself in this relationship - and I can see that you want to find a way to work it out. That is a very wonderful quality that you have.
I'm about to say what I think, and I really hope that you think about what I'm saying to you. Try not to write it off because it may not be what you were hoping to hear. I have been in your position, swear to god. I think the position you're in is not something to be taken lightly. I mean both in the terms of the state of the relationship, and also that you said it makes you want to kill yourself. (Please don't do that - I promise you that things always get better - seriously, always - I've been there.)
1. I don't think you should feel like a crazy person. There is a legitimate reason that you are feeling alone, ignored, unloved, and ill-treated. It's because you are. He is spending less and less time with you, leaving you out when friends get together, not enjoying the things you two used to enjoy doing together, and above all, physically hurting you. You feel badly because someone you love is treating you badly - it makes a lot of sense.
2. Though it may have started as a perfect relationship - it is an abusive relationship as of now. Not only physically, but from what I can gather, more emotionally abusive than anything else. You are giving everything you have to this relationship and what you are getting back is very, very negative.
3. I do not think you should stay with this person. I think you will be able to find someone who appreciates you more every day. I don't think you should marry someone who causes you to even utter the words "I want to kill myself" - even if you know in your heart that you wouldn't do it. I think you should find someone better for you.
Keep your heart open to someone who will work out conflicts with you openly, never make fun of you in front of his friends, and most importantly make you feel loved.
--
sweet88
11 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
0
0
Thank you very much, your point of view regarding my relationship touched me deeply. I do understand what you say is true, it is practical..but above all that I have some obligations too. That is why I'm seeking help to get things back to normal, there might be a way i just wish!
I'm very emotional person,I have the urge to feel secured because of my childhood experiences,my parents had always been very violent at each other and as a kid i didn't have the best time. I found a lot of faith in my boyfriend for the past few years before all this emotional turmoil began.I am deeply attached to him,It will not be possible for me to forget him, there are too many reasons, you might see I am obsessed but i wont call my love for him is an obsession.
Secondly I live in a country where culture rule. Simply saying a virgin is the best choice for marriage if not then her married life will be a living hell.I cant move on because of this reason.More over I don't have many friends to talk about this, and i keep bottling up.I am glad I found this site, at least I got some decent replies. I may sound stupid but I don't want to be left alone all my life without him.