I need help

84% Normal
9 Comments

Here's my problem. For some reason I'm nervous to have sex with my boyfriend. I mean once we get into it and we actually start to have sex I like it and don't want it to stop. It's just the getting into it that I don't like. Like when he starts to take my cloths off. Also I don't like telling him yes when he asks for it. I kinda just want it to happen not to be planed. Is this normal? Hellpppppp!

Voting Results
84% Normal
Based on 99 votes (83 yes)
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Comments ( 9 )
  • la_uva_mojada
    12 years ago

    your bf is probably young, horny, inexperienced, and clueless. He needs to learn how a woman's body works, foreplay?!?!? HELLO???!?!

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  • [Old Memory]
    14 years ago

    I agree with the first 2 posts. try making out on the couch and get in the "mood". i know tht would work for me. just talk to him about it. if he is a good bf then he should understand and want to please you to the best extent

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  • Lysette
    14 years ago

    Try taking the initiative from time to time. Be aggressive, get on top. That will take away the nervousness you feel at other times.
    There is nothing with what you have been feeling but if you want to change it you can.

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  • t1234564
    14 years ago

    Why dont you initiate it?
    If your bf feels its a strain to get you in the mood it will bounce off you too.
    Try concentrate on pleasing him and youll forget about your own preworries ;)

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  • WayOutThere
    14 years ago

    I agree with the first two posts. This is perfectly normal.

    Most girls will not verbally commit to a verbal request to have sex, even if they want that to happen. It is normal instead to do all this non-verbally, one step at a time. Moreover, your boyfriend needs to engage in enough foreplay to get you aroused.

    It could also be that you consciously or unconsciously hold some religious belief that sex is "dirty" or "sinful" or otherwise improper. And, that makes you nervous.

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  • Namarta
    14 years ago

    I agree with both comments. You have to do some thinking about what you want from you relationship and whether you even want sex.

    You have a hurdle to get over. Once I came to an age when I had developed a sex drive, all I ever wanted was sex. That hasn't changed. And if any body takes too long over asking, instead of getting down and doing it, I just get bored.

    Just do the sex.

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  • russellnb
    14 years ago

    I think you believe what you are doing is wrong and so you want him to do it and not involve your consent. You are probably Catholic and are concerned about going to hell.

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  • Billowo
    14 years ago

    Absolutely normal, you just want to "be romantic" with him instead of just "doing it"..., tell him that if he wants to "do it" he has to "earn it", then he will become romantic and all will go downhill... good luck.

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    • Wiseguy
      12 years ago

      If I were you, I would NOT tell him that he has to "earn it." I'm a 30 year old guy and if a girl ever said that to me, I would feel like she doesn't appreciate me, and if it didn't end the relationship I would at least be very offended.

      You want it to just "happen" and not feel like an obligation? Then you should initiate the encounter. If he's not spontaneous enough, YOU be spontaneous, and hope that it will rub off on him (tee hee).

      You don't like him pulling your clothes off? PULL YOUR OWN CLOTHES OFF FIRST! Or do it right after a shower, which is much more hygienic anyway.

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