I'm scared of scratching my a**hole

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  • No, on tumor lumps or on lady lumps?

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    • BOTH!

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      • But with lady lumps you could milk yourself like a cow with induced lactation!

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        • NO!

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          • http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QBEYxldFKHs

            Japan must really love human cows.

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          • Alternative coffee creamer.

            They sell breast milk in Japan.

            And there's always this potential career in your future…

            http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IAxzpTX8aHw

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