If you completely understood, and predicted that I would react that way, then why did you not give your latter response in the first place?
And, your second question is very broad, so if you're using that to combat the way I feel, you might want to go another route. If I created baggage on myself and that baggage was the reason she rejected me, then I have nobody to blame but myself. If it was baggage that I had no control over, then I would be hurt, but at the same time I would not question her judgements.
Additionally, what's reasonable and unreasonable depends on what kind of person you are and how you were raised. If the girl I really, really want doesn't want to be with me because of some fault that I have and she doesn't help me realize that, then nobody is benefiting nor losing out on the situation. If that was the case, it would be best for her to let me know, just like I allowed this girl to know.
In any event, your last statement was very powerful. I do always wonder why I only seem to attract girls I find unacceptable. I also sometimes feel that the good ones don't want to be anywhere near me. But understand this, pretend you were raised in you "birth" environment and were never exposed to another environment so in that respect, everything in your current environment was the norm for you. Now, flip things around a bit and pretend that you were then exposed to an environment where everything was 100% better but then you were reverted back to the environment you came from. Now with that being said, how likely are you to go back to old habits or norms in your old environment, something you now consider "inferior"? Highly unlikely sir, highly unlikely.
You can ramble all you want, but there's gotta be some reason why all the 'wrong' girls are the only one's you're meeting. Either you're COMPLETELY unreasonable, or you're not up to par for the kind of girl you think you 'need'. It has to be either, or. Figure it out, then problem solved. Maybe you need to work on yourself, or maybe you need to reevaluate what's acceptable combined with whatever the hell it is YOU have to offer. Which is what, exactly?
Come on. Would you date a guy who, in a previous life, slept with 3 of your good friends. All of whom you talk to on a regular basis? Imagine the wedding. :X lol
I would date a guy who slept with 5 of my friends, and invite them over to see if they all wanted to have some fun together provided they were disease free.
But I don't have time for this really, I've seen the long winded responses you post and I hate that shit. Win your argument... by saying more than the other person. ;P
Doesn't sound like you have a big, loving heart if all you can see is faults in everyone (besides yourself) and think you deserve something you very well may not.
Something's out of balance here, obviously. Are you approaching girls you feel are up to your standards? If so, are you immediately getting shot down?
*smh* I don't at all think he's just going around looking at every single little bitty fault of this girl! It seems to me that there are just some hangups that he can't really let go of. EVERYONE has standards. And people should have standards! His just happens to be that he doesn't want to date a skank. I wouldn't particularly want to date a skank either. It's not fun getting leftovers. What's so wrong about having standards about who you date? I believe you shouldn't lower your standards just to find someone to be with.
I cannot help but to agree with you. It seems that the people who are severely bothered by my statement are those who've been especially promiscuous themselves at one time in their life, predictably, and consider promiscuity a trait that I must look past because "everyone" has their faults. Truthfully, I don't think anyone wants a skank, but that's difficult to not stumble over. So, if I have do date a skank, I rather not date one that has particularly slept with a plethora of my mates. Not only would that make me look bad and stupid, it would seriously destroy my self-confidence and go against all the time I have invested in screening out the women in my past. That pretty much means that if I had accepted this one, then I would consider myself stupid for the ones I passed up previously because they weren't in such bad shape as this one was.
I liked her, but her past interfered?
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If you completely understood, and predicted that I would react that way, then why did you not give your latter response in the first place?
And, your second question is very broad, so if you're using that to combat the way I feel, you might want to go another route. If I created baggage on myself and that baggage was the reason she rejected me, then I have nobody to blame but myself. If it was baggage that I had no control over, then I would be hurt, but at the same time I would not question her judgements.
Additionally, what's reasonable and unreasonable depends on what kind of person you are and how you were raised. If the girl I really, really want doesn't want to be with me because of some fault that I have and she doesn't help me realize that, then nobody is benefiting nor losing out on the situation. If that was the case, it would be best for her to let me know, just like I allowed this girl to know.
In any event, your last statement was very powerful. I do always wonder why I only seem to attract girls I find unacceptable. I also sometimes feel that the good ones don't want to be anywhere near me. But understand this, pretend you were raised in you "birth" environment and were never exposed to another environment so in that respect, everything in your current environment was the norm for you. Now, flip things around a bit and pretend that you were then exposed to an environment where everything was 100% better but then you were reverted back to the environment you came from. Now with that being said, how likely are you to go back to old habits or norms in your old environment, something you now consider "inferior"? Highly unlikely sir, highly unlikely.
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wigsplitz
11 years ago
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I'm not a sir, thank you very much.
You can ramble all you want, but there's gotta be some reason why all the 'wrong' girls are the only one's you're meeting. Either you're COMPLETELY unreasonable, or you're not up to par for the kind of girl you think you 'need'. It has to be either, or. Figure it out, then problem solved. Maybe you need to work on yourself, or maybe you need to reevaluate what's acceptable combined with whatever the hell it is YOU have to offer. Which is what, exactly?
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Anesthesiologist
11 years ago
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Come on. Would you date a guy who, in a previous life, slept with 3 of your good friends. All of whom you talk to on a regular basis? Imagine the wedding. :X lol
And what do I have to offer? A big, loving heart.
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shade_ilmaendu
11 years ago
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wigsplitz
11 years ago
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I would date a guy who slept with 5 of my friends, and invite them over to see if they all wanted to have some fun together provided they were disease free.
But I don't have time for this really, I've seen the long winded responses you post and I hate that shit. Win your argument... by saying more than the other person. ;P
Just go watch Chasing Amy.
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Anesthesiologist
11 years ago
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So, explain how that movie relates? I really want to hear this one. And please tell me how the lesbian relates to the situation.
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shade_ilmaendu
11 years ago
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Umm.. *spoiler alert* The entire plot of the movie is about how the guy is unable to get over "the lesbian's" past and so he loses her.... >.>
Doesn't sound like you have a big, loving heart if all you can see is faults in everyone (besides yourself) and think you deserve something you very well may not.
Something's out of balance here, obviously. Are you approaching girls you feel are up to your standards? If so, are you immediately getting shot down?
Where are you trying to meet girls?
Do you have a job? A nice place?
What kind of baggage do you have?
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NocturnePonyFan
11 years ago
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*smh* I don't at all think he's just going around looking at every single little bitty fault of this girl! It seems to me that there are just some hangups that he can't really let go of. EVERYONE has standards. And people should have standards! His just happens to be that he doesn't want to date a skank. I wouldn't particularly want to date a skank either. It's not fun getting leftovers. What's so wrong about having standards about who you date? I believe you shouldn't lower your standards just to find someone to be with.
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Anesthesiologist
11 years ago
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I cannot help but to agree with you. It seems that the people who are severely bothered by my statement are those who've been especially promiscuous themselves at one time in their life, predictably, and consider promiscuity a trait that I must look past because "everyone" has their faults. Truthfully, I don't think anyone wants a skank, but that's difficult to not stumble over. So, if I have do date a skank, I rather not date one that has particularly slept with a plethora of my mates. Not only would that make me look bad and stupid, it would seriously destroy my self-confidence and go against all the time I have invested in screening out the women in my past. That pretty much means that if I had accepted this one, then I would consider myself stupid for the ones I passed up previously because they weren't in such bad shape as this one was.