I like to have my cake and eat it too.

51% Normal
27 Comments

I love my girlfriend, but I also like good oral, giving and getting. She gives a really lame, half-ass blow job. We've talked about and talked about but she is just not into it. She tells me that past boyfriends have complained about the same shit. Emotionally I am in love with her. We started living together a few weeks ago and we are otherwise a good fit. A couple of nights ago I cheated on her with an old girlfriend who gives fantastic head and wants to rekindle our relationship. This old girlfriend knows about the new one but still wants to see me on the down low. WTF? One day I'm alone and depressed, the next day I got more than enough to handle. Would it be normal to start fucking both of them on a regular basis? I'd be a happy camper if I did. And I'd satisfy both my emotional and sexual needs. Make sense?

Voting Results
51% Normal
Based on 47 votes (24 yes)
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Comments ( 27 )
  • Short4Words
    8 years ago

    This is going to going to go well.

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  • Thedollcollector8==D
    8 years ago

    Probably not a good idea in the long run. You are headed towards having one of them throw your penis into a vacant field from a moving car.

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  • LordOfTheFries
    8 years ago

    Just don't be sorry when you get caught up. You're doing your gf wrong so be a man about it if she catches you.

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  • lifeisforreal
    8 years ago

    Don't do it keep the girlfriend tell the ex that you love your gf and sex is not the most important thing in a relationship

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  • flyingnostalgia
    8 years ago

    I can understand her. I would never ever put something so dirty in my mouth.

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    • TheSailorOfTheSevenBasements
      8 years ago

      You have absolutely no friends and are still a virgin at 25.

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      • flyingnostalgia
        8 years ago

        I just have to say this is the best name so far on this site and you get my congratulation for that!

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    • Thedollcollector8==D
      8 years ago

      You are probably a virgin and still think boys have cooties.

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  • Charli.m.s_Never_Ending_Period
    8 years ago

    You are a bit off the mark, old chum. The objective is to have your cake and FUCK it too.

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  • bucho's_butt
    8 years ago

    "I'd be a happy camper if I did." That was hilariously worded my friend. Good job.

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  • Rihyae
    8 years ago

    Why don't you hit your girlfriend over the head, chloroform the other one, cryonically freeze them and yourself and then wake up in the future where you can mesh them together into a hot girl who loves you and can really suck cock.

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  • najumm2025
    8 years ago

    That's so fuckin horrid. You'd be an absolute prick if you start seeing your ex as well as seeing your acc gf. Like wtf. You can't tell her you love her and all than crap when all you want out of the relationship is a good blowjob which your gf can't give. If your idea of a relationship means having a girl who can satisfy your needs, then you need to rethink where your priorities lay.
    You don't deserve her and I hope she realises what a shitface you are.

    :)

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  • usethedolltoshowuswereTGStouch
    8 years ago

    If it was my cake, why the fuck wouldn't I eat it?

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  • BlackyHancock
    8 years ago

    Normal if you discussed with the GF and shes ok with it. If not - shit will hit fan when she finds out.

    I used to have that situation, having the great pleasure of pleasing 2 girls in the same weekend and both knowing about each other and both happy to share me. I used to feel like I was starring in a porn film. 20 yrs earlier they were friends when they were at school.

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  • Ebolohammeh
    8 years ago

    Blow your own trumpet much.

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  • MeatHookSodomy
    8 years ago

    I had the same problem with an ex of mine having bought jaw lifters for sleep apnea, dental wax molding for all types of bullshit that either made it slightly better or worse.

    So I had enough and bought her an "open mouth gag" and although she may not be a happy camper about it it certainly solved my problem.

    Here's a picture of the devise if interested...

    https://images.duckduckgo.com/iu/?u=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.extremerestraints.com.au%2Fstore%2Fcatalog%2Fns135.jpg&f=1

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  • dytrog
    8 years ago

    I LIKE TO EAT MY CAKE AND HAVE IT TOO.
    If your girlfriend has sucked tat many cocks with complaints do you really want someone that has sucked that many cocks befor you.

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    • Thedollcollector8==D
      8 years ago

      I wonder if she unknowingly swallowed any yellow colored syphilis loads.

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  • Twickers
    8 years ago

    Just sayin', if you were my partner and I found out....I'd give you a blow job you'd never forget. Not until you got reconstructive surgery, anyway.

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    • Thedollcollector8==D
      8 years ago

      If a woman tried to bite my dick in half I would slice open her throat in self defense.

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      • Twickers
        8 years ago

        You'd be curled up on the floor, crying with your dolls, wishing you had stuck with them instead of a real woman.

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        • Thedollcollector8==D
          8 years ago

          I would add you to my collection.

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          • Twickers
            8 years ago

            If you only you could stop crying long enough to catch me.

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            • Thedollcollector8==D
              8 years ago

              You need tp be punished.

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  • RoseIsabella
    8 years ago

    You're gonna get indigestion. I do wanna say, however, that I could never understand people who aren't into oral sex as long as they're both fresh and clean of course.

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    • TheSailorOfTheSevenBasements
      8 years ago

      You are a religious freak who hangs out with cats instead of people, and you think you are a cat because you have schizophrenia.

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  • Charli.m.s_Never_Ending_Period
    8 years ago

    You should probably break up with your live-in girlfriend. Sex beats love every time.

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