I know i'm gay but don't want to be plus i hate being referred a gay.

Well what do you want to be referred as?

Have you ever considered you're are a pomosexual? Pomesexual people are people who hate terms and labels, like gay, straight etc. and yes, most probably do have a bias towards one or another gender, but they don't label it.

I'm white and I hate being called white. It's especially degrading when I have to check the "white" box myself on forms. I can't help it if I was born this way, and that is the proper term for my respective traits.

You probably live in an environment where being gay isn't accepted as "normal". But you should learn to live with it and accept it - you can't change it anyway. Imo being gay is one of the best things in this world. :P

I hate being labeled anything.

Umm that's not a question...

I think you always know esp in gym class when you are all changing clothes. Either you look or you dont. Smell the bench they sat on or you dont. At 17 your homones are in overdrive and lots of things look tempting. So dont confuse it with blue balls or curiosity. Im an ass lover and when i see a smooth round ass all i think of is tapping it male or female.

There was a huge stigma against being gay when I grew up. Nobody would have ever thought to "come out" in high school and to do so in general society was a career killer for adults outside the entertainment industry. It was a huge scandal when an NFL player "came out" in 1968!
Today, it's nothing to be gay; most are "out" and proud of it. Teen age girls consider themselves gay as a way to rebel and teen guys use it as an excuse to have twice as much sex as they would if they labeled themselves straight. (I'm not saying that there aren't truly gay people, at all).
And that's the saddest part of your post, to me. In a world where you have the freedom to be who you are w/o too much flack, you are choosing self loathing and unhappiness over acceptance and living life on your own terms. What a shame.

Shall i call you a homosexual then?

i understand what you mean. im not gay but i could see how being gay has a negative stimulus. maybe you should create a positive image for your community

Does being a gay benefit you in some other ways?

People are just people, there is no straight, bi, or gay. It's all a choice. And people are born with different sinful tendencies. You were born with homosexual tendencies. That's no different than the desire to lie, or steal things, or cheat. Don't classify yourself any differently than other people.

You need to find the reason behind WHY you feel the way you do in order to live a happy life. Is it fear of being judged? Is it some sort of bulls**t morality instilled in you telling you it's wrong? There is definitely nothing "wrong" about being homosexual.

Afraid of judgement can be a hard thing to overcome, but that starts with you. You have to be comfortable with who you are and accept that you can't change it, no matter how badly you want to. You can't change it any more than your height or eye colour. Once you are comfortable enough with who you are, people judging you will no longer bother you. You'll realize that their judgement comes either from ignorance or their own insecurities about themselves.

Stay strong :)