about the depression in college thing... i felt like that my freshman year and even talked to a counselor (only at the end of the year because i tried to ignore my depression all year). and she wasn't that helpful ..but only because she kept saying i was completely normal.
it's so normal to look around and think everyone else is having a good time... especially when you're at social events like club meetings.
despite everyone's advice, most people don't go to clubs by themselves or with people they don't know that well.. so that's why they always seem to be having a good time. and you know why they only go with people they already know? because they're scared. they're scared of feeling lonely with around a ton of people they don't know. so props to you for being brave!!
and then about the hating yourself ..i have definitely been there. from my experiences i really think it's related to depression. when you're depressed, it's hard to focus on conversations and to feel comfortable enough to just talk about simple things. you crave being able to talk about your depression to someone, and not just about how pretty someone's clothes are. you feel like you need close friends to talk to about heavy stuff like depression to be happy and get better. and that's probably true, but you start expecting it from everyone, or expect it to come easily.
you start thinking something is wrong with you because you don't feel close to people, but in reality you can't get genuinely close everybody really quickly.. you might find people you get close with fast but there will only be like 2 or 3 of those people in you're entire life. that's just what's normal.
i'm probably emotionally close to my dad, to my oldest friend, and to my most depressed friend. i have a boyfriend, other friends, and the rest of my family that i love and care for, but i can't be at that special emotional level with everybody in my life. lacking that deep spiritual connection doesn't mean loving and having fun with people isn't possible.
I have no friends in college and I feel extremely lonely and depressed
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couple things... first of all you're so normal :)
about the depression in college thing... i felt like that my freshman year and even talked to a counselor (only at the end of the year because i tried to ignore my depression all year). and she wasn't that helpful ..but only because she kept saying i was completely normal.
it's so normal to look around and think everyone else is having a good time... especially when you're at social events like club meetings.
despite everyone's advice, most people don't go to clubs by themselves or with people they don't know that well.. so that's why they always seem to be having a good time. and you know why they only go with people they already know? because they're scared. they're scared of feeling lonely with around a ton of people they don't know. so props to you for being brave!!
and then about the hating yourself ..i have definitely been there. from my experiences i really think it's related to depression. when you're depressed, it's hard to focus on conversations and to feel comfortable enough to just talk about simple things. you crave being able to talk about your depression to someone, and not just about how pretty someone's clothes are. you feel like you need close friends to talk to about heavy stuff like depression to be happy and get better. and that's probably true, but you start expecting it from everyone, or expect it to come easily.
you start thinking something is wrong with you because you don't feel close to people, but in reality you can't get genuinely close everybody really quickly.. you might find people you get close with fast but there will only be like 2 or 3 of those people in you're entire life. that's just what's normal.
i'm probably emotionally close to my dad, to my oldest friend, and to my most depressed friend. i have a boyfriend, other friends, and the rest of my family that i love and care for, but i can't be at that special emotional level with everybody in my life. lacking that deep spiritual connection doesn't mean loving and having fun with people isn't possible.