As others have said, you are too young to lock yourself down with one person. He cheated on you, and you cheated on him, so you have no right to feel angry towards him if you did the same thing.
Your relationship is not healthy. You need to break up and stay single for a while so you can have these random hookups you seem to desire without ruining anyone's life.
I feel like I don't have a personality anymore.
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As others have said, you are too young to lock yourself down with one person. He cheated on you, and you cheated on him, so you have no right to feel angry towards him if you did the same thing.
Your relationship is not healthy. You need to break up and stay single for a while so you can have these random hookups you seem to desire without ruining anyone's life.