You're not unkind person at all. Many people will not say that they do want to kiss someone they're not attracted to, and doing that doesn't even make them mean. Everyone has a right to say no to kissing someone they're not attracted to, that does not make them mean. And a lot of people will tell a friend they're busy sometimes when they don't feel like it. You're being very cordial compared to how some people are.
I feel like a terrible person sometimes
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You're not unkind person at all. Many people will not say that they do want to kiss someone they're not attracted to, and doing that doesn't even make them mean. Everyone has a right to say no to kissing someone they're not attracted to, that does not make them mean. And a lot of people will tell a friend they're busy sometimes when they don't feel like it. You're being very cordial compared to how some people are.