I don't want to get married iin?

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Is it normal that I do not want to ever be married in my life?

I'm female. I don't want kids, ever. I'm greedy with my time and I'm getting a little bit sick of guys assuming I'm the typical girl wanting all that traditional crap. No way!

Seriously, abnormal, right? Excellent!
Anyone else like this, or am I truly a deviant anomaly?

I've distanced my friends that have suddenly had kids. I'm like, oh, I'll see you in about six to ten years,bye. It's like they graduated college, went home, and quit life to become baby breeders. I find that utterly boring! I have too much to do rather than waste my time on the same old, same old, and I have no understanding of how people can be that stupid to repeat this baby breeder habit. Statistically, these couples will likely face near divorce approximately 5 years after that kid is born. I've seen this so many times. Research backs me up. I'm not making this up on anecdotal evidence.

For record, I actually like kids. I just don't want to be responsible for them, nor produce any, not in this world, no way. I spent a lot of time as a volunteer working with kids. I've seen a lot of shit kids face from negligent p.o.s. irresponsible parents. They don't take their job seriously enough. What a shame. That kid suffers for it.

Marriage is a trap. As a kid, I saw several divorces. Usually, the guy got taken for a ton of money when all was said and done. Guys, I warn you. Don't get married. Get the fantasy bullshit out of your head, and be careful. It's like being lured into a venus flytrap. Don't do it, lol!

Voting Results

79% Normal

Based on 34 votes (27 yes)

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Comments ( 46 )

charli.m

6 years ago

So don't? It's really not complicated.

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[Old Memory]

6 years ago

Normal. I never want to get married or have kids either. I don't even want relationships. Emotional intimacy makes me uncomfortable.

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edwininthematrix

6 years ago

You sound like my cousin who is an actress and she declared a long time ago that marriage is not for her. Instead she prefers to focus on her career, have fun with the single bachelorette lifestyle, drink and party, explore places and go on adventures, and have relations with multiple guys sometimes simultaneously. My family isn't too proud of her but they do respect her celebrity status and her wealth at a relatively young age. She even had a guy who proposed to her and she literally took the diamond ring and ran away as fast as she could.

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- [Old Memory]
  
  6 years ago
  
  lol savage
  
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Arrissot

6 years ago

I might get married, but probably not

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  6 years ago
  
  Maybe yes, maybe no? Which fork in the road will you take? Either one.
  
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[Old Memory]

6 years ago

Meh. So don’t get married, we don’t care.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  6 years ago
  
  I'm delighted that you posted such an indifferent response. How kind of you to feel inclined to net a bit of attention. Thanks for contributing to the discussion.
  
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  - [Old Memory]
    
    6 years ago
    
    You’re ranting and making a statement. There is noting to contribute. Don’t get married and die a lonely, old, bitter spinster, it’s your decision. Get some cats, you’re going to need them.
    Is that better?
    
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    - cameragoth
      
      5 years ago
      
      Yeah cos those are the only two options in life...
      
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itachi_uchiha

6 years ago

Well its normal it's what you want but don't force or encourage other people that dont do marriage its a trap & shit like that
Its what you believe don't force other to believe it too

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  6 years ago
  
  Yeah it's my plan to dictate to others to stop before it's too late? LOL! Nope. They'll figure it out. I get to enjoy making bets about how long such relationships will last.
  
  If someone genuinely asks my advice, I'm going to be honest. They don't have to take my word for it. I'll send them the research, and they can make their own decision.
  
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  - kupokupo
    
    6 years ago
    
    How often are you accurate in betting how long other people's relationships will last?
    
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  - RoseIsabella
    
    6 years ago
    
    You sound a little too obsessed with what other people are doing with their lives. Forget about them and focus on yourself.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      6 years ago
      
      Really, it was a rather impulsive curious question, I asked. Can't say I ruminate over this issue, not at all. I do find it funny that every guy I meet seems to spring this question, or, comical to me, hems around a bit to establish that he's all about marriage and kids, and what not. Sometimes, I know they're just trying to figure me out, but they're not serious. I surely hope their not serious, because I'm not at all into marriage, like ever.
      
      I can say that I find friends, and relatives, mildly irritating when they encourage every other female around to get married. I'm like, nope. It seems to be a common question I get asked a bit too much. They all have kids. They're also all sleep-deprived, cranky, and usually want to complain about their family issues to the first person they corner. I just want to slither away as quickly as possible.
      
      It's funny, I will babysit. These kids love me. I can't figure out why, other than I don't paternalize them, so they find me fun.
      
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      - Boojum
        
        6 years ago
        
        The stereotype is that women are interested in long-term commitment, and there is some truth in that. If you get involved with a guy in a situation that he understands to be more significant than just a random hook-up, it's likely that he's going to wonder what you have in mind.
        
        Some guys are genuinely interested in marriage and children, but some try to establish their potential daddy credentials early on not because they're really interested, but because they've had success using this ploy with women in the past.
        
        By the way, I think you're probably right about why kids like you. Many adults do patronise and talk down to children as if they know nothing, and kids do find this annoying. While I never forget that children don't know as much as me and have less experience of the world than me, I try to treat them as just small human beings. If I have to explain something, I do so in the same way as I would explain it to another adult. I find this approach is usually well-received.
        
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  - itachi_uchiha
    
    6 years ago
    
    Too late!! are you serious its not your place to tell people that you shouldn't get married or you can predict how long there relationship will last.. its fine & (seriously normal) to not want get married but you just can't tell others that its always gonna end the same way & beaides that I think you really don't know the real statistics of marriage outside america(if that's where you live)
    sure you can tell people who asks for your advice (which I hardly think will happen) but you can't just spread the word marriages fall apart
    Woow I got your disease too I just wrote a lot 😁
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      6 years ago
      
      Which First World Country's marriage/divorce rates should we check out? Eh, why not look at all of the cohabitation practices out there in the world?
      
      Of course there's some really unusual relationship patterns that don't follow the conventional Western matrimonial monogamous style at all. I didn't mention polygamy, polyandry. How about an arranged marriage?
      
      Seems to be culturally learned, whatever people choose to do. Just saying that people tend to follow upon traditions they were taught.
      
      I don't actually openly tell people their marriage will fail like a cursed future date, lol, no no. Of course not, lol.
      
      Oh yes, my disease of writing beyond a few sentences. What a shame, I didn't resort to text speak format.
      
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      - itachi_uchiha
        
        6 years ago
        
        Damm girl (or boy in case) you have written a lot I didn't read the whole comment just some random words like arranged marriage, monogamy ,etc but I think arranged marriage don't fall apart that easily more than 80% people get married with this arranged marriage system mainly in countries like India(I think haven't checked yet but sure you can & then tell me ) which have very less percentage of divorce then love marriage or any other
        Btw I am a programming nurd so I don't use text speak format or whatever
        
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Dustyair

6 years ago

You sound like a troll pushing a feminist agenda.

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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  6 years ago
  
  Bah, ha ha, nope. I loathe these doofus idiots that claim we're all the same, and all that crap. That's the most uneducated crapola ever! I adore gentlemen men. Absolutely love it! I let them be men. I loooove it!
  
  Just being honest about how *I* feel. The question concerns if I am normal, or not? Guess not, lol.
  
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  - Dustyair
    
    6 years ago
    
    No, I'd say your just an angry feminist spraying her menstrual blood on society again.
    
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Cesar91

5 years ago

Its your choice...

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[Old Memory]

5 years ago

I don't think I'm going to marry either. I already have friends that I like to have sleepovers with and cuddle. We might move in together someday and just be like a pack. That's all I need. Don't need marriage drama and sex bullshit.

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Indigobloom1

6 years ago

It's normal but there are many women out there who don't want a man just for his money. Stop stereotyping women -_-. Me and my partner already agreed are not having kids even though I like kids I just feel I wouldn't be able to cope but I certainly get married tho

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Bobtailcatgirl

6 years ago

I agree I never want to get married or have kids.

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[Old Memory]

6 years ago

Your decision of not getting married is normal. You have your rights to decide whether you get married and have kids or not. Generalizing this and saying "don't get married because it's a trap", implying that all marriages end up in an unhappy life is wrong. Many people hurry up to do it early, with little to no life experience, and they make those stats increase a lot in this direction. It's also the fact that their condition is not compatible with marriage, even if their partners were suitable for them. But there are a lot of people who are happy with their marriage, and I invite you to have a read about their stories. You need to think about your resources (time, cash, experience) before you make this step. Failing in this doesn't necessarily mean it's a bad thing itself. It might be that you were unprepared. It's always good to stay informed, no matter what you decide to do.

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Boojum

6 years ago

I think that, in an ideal world, adults would only be allowed to have children when they were proven to be capable of being at least adequate parents.

Your OP comes across as a little ranty, but I can understand that. There's a lot of truth in what you say, but you're swimming against the cultural tide, and it's easy to get exasperated when people ignore facts that seem obvious to you.

It's always good when we think things through for ourselves, rather than taking the easiest option and blindly following the herd. But a lot of members of the herd find this difficult to accept, sometimes because there's a niggling thought at the back of their mind that their lives could be much better if they, too, had found the strength to strike off on their own.

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Blsf

6 years ago

I don't think it's not normal. What i think is the cheesiest shit you'll read, but it can be 100% sure...
You just didn't find the right one yet. And as cheesy as it sounds, there is probably guy out there for you, that will wake up your wish for kids, for marriage and all of that. Just be patient

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- [Old Memory]
  
  6 years ago
  
  Honestly, that's just a mom story for an ugly daughter who can't get a date. Unrealistic if you ask me.
  
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  6 years ago
  
  Blsf, lol, ooooh please let me be immune, lol! If you're right, I swear you cursed me with punishment, lol.
  
  Yeah, to be fair to you, there is someone, but I won't get married. No way. I'm letting my reasoning side kick the back of my instinctive mind to bits with a "snap out of it" slap to the face. I'm not without feeling, if that's what you wanted to know. All instincts present, yes. But, education and long range life intentions,plus seriously selfish tendencies to own my time and space put a stop to it.
  
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geek_god_101

6 years ago

Marriage is obsolete as having children. Traditions are dying anyway. Besides, women like you have realized having children and being married are as optional as having an education, owning a house or even driving an automobile.
There are people realizing this and it is great. Most men don't want to get married due to fear of losing too many assets.

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redrainbow22

6 years ago

Girls do things like traditional marriage because they like to.

Not because they are forced to. No one says girls HAVE to do this or that.

There is no pressure on girls.

Seriously though, this just sounds like a agenda coming from somewhere else to get girls and guys fighting with each other.

Marriage is a beautiful thing. You just dont always have to let the government get involved.

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- Boojum
  
  6 years ago
  
  "There is no pressure on girls."
  
  Yeah. Right.
  
  From the moment they're born, girls are subjected to an endless stream of messages from all directions that they should aspire to eventually find Mr Right, get married, and have children.
  
  If you stepped outside your comfortable little bubble and had a look around the world, you'd find that what's considered "natural" in our society is nothing of the sort, but merely a Judeo-Christian cultural construct.
  
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  - redrainbow22
    
    5 years ago
    
    There isnt.
    
    Only what you put into your mind.
    
    Of course this would be the feminist narrative.
    
    "I'm a victim. I'm a victim. Help me I'm so useless."
    
    Shut up. Girls are treated sometimes FAR better than men. Stop with your victim complex.
    
    No one is pressured. If you feel that way, you're delusional, and listening to too much propaganda.
    
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  - [Old Memory]
    
    6 years ago
    
    That's true.
    
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- Anonymous Post Author
  
  6 years ago
  
  They do traditional marriage often based on instinct. Fine fine. I just haven't seen it work in the real world that often, if at all.
  
  Nope, no agenda. Are you kidding? Married people that pop out babies? Well, if I was selling diapers, happened to be in the education industry, or anything of the sort, that's a guaranteed revenue stream! That's a beautiful thing.
  
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  - Dustyair
    
    6 years ago
    
    You sure sound like a hateful feminist here in this post, wow. So what did marriage ever do to you, and "popping out kids" too?
    
    Haha, you sound like that shit bag Gloria Stienhem that sprays her menstrual blood all over society with her feminism.
    
    Is it the fact that men really are superior to women, and we white males engineered the best societies to live in?
    
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  - redrainbow22
    
    6 years ago
    
    Not every marriage works. But marriage still works and is beautiful.
    
    If your talking about relationships failing, most of it is probably because of porn and sex.
    
    Girls just like marriage, I dont know if it has anything to do with instinct.
    
    Some people care more about having their own beautiful child.
    
    Everyone to their own.
    
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    - Anonymous Post Author
      
      6 years ago
      
      What, if anything you said, has any basis in fact and evidence?
      
      Porn and sex? That's the only reason for relationships to cease? Sometimes people grow apart, realize they didn't have a thing in common other than honeymoon hormone bliss, sometimes people shift directions in life, I could go on, and on. Seems as if it's a biological wiring sort of thing to me, at least that's what behavioral research of human relationships has found to be common.
      
      As economic prosperity, education, and all that jazz increases, you will see that marriage rates fall, people take longer and longer to get married, and birthrates fall. That's the data.
      
      Girls just like marriage? Yes, it's all got to do with instinct. It's a hormonal response. It's all got to do with procreation. Oxytocin and vasopressin are the two bonding hormones that shift that attachment need into high drive. Yeah, it's a biological drive.
      
      I'll personally never understand why people want to have children, but they do. I haven't bothered to remember any of the research I had to learn in school. I like to think it's related to dopamine, and extremely optimistic thinking.
      
      Bursting all the idealism here. Excuse me, I sat through one too many anthropology and biological psych courses.
      
      Okay, my girly brain does love the whole Disney princess marriage fantasy, lol. I've only seen very few good marriages. Very few! Guess for them it was a rare lucky perfect timing kind of match?
      
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      - redrainbow22
        
        6 years ago
        
        Who says your a girl?
        
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        Anonymous Post Author
        
        6 years ago
        
        Biology as in XX chromosomes.
        
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- [Old Memory]
  
  6 years ago
  
  You seem to lack a lot of life experience.
  
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Are You Normal?

I don't want to get married iin?