I cant make myself have an orgasm

i didnt get an orasm til i was 12

I'll make the leap to assuming you're female since you mention dildos and vibrators. (Some guys use these too, but that's less common.)

First, since I'm just an old guy with a fair amount of experience of helping women to have orgasms but no direct experience of having a woman's body, I can't really offer first-hand advice, and you'd be wise to take everything I say with a grain of salt.

Unless something is very wrong physiologically, it should be possible for you to have an orgasm. Some antidepressants and anti-anxiety drugs can make it difficult or impossible to reach orgasm, but the barrier is most commonly psychological.

It can be one of those frustratingly paradoxical situations where being afraid that you won't achieve a goal makes it less likely that you actually will.

At the risk of sounding incredibly patronising, I have to wonder if you're familiar enough with your own anatomy to know where your clitoris is and if you understand its central role in the female sexual response. You mention dildos and vibrators, which implies that you believe you need to be penetrated in order to reach orgasm. In fact, surveys have found that only around a fifth of women are capable of having an orgasm with penetrative sex alone. For the vast majority of women, clitoral stimulation is what they need in order to come.

Men are generally pretty obvious and mechanical when it comes to sex, but women are much more complicated. What's going on in your head will probably always be a huge factor in you experiencing sexual pleasure and reaching orgasm, while what's going on with your genitals will be of secondary or, at best, equal importance.

Anxiety and embarrassment (and the fear of it) can very effectively kill sexual arousal. You say you can't have sex toys, so that makes me wonder if your living arrangements are such that you don't have a place that's truly private and exclusively yours. If you're always afraid you might be caught, it wouldn't be surprising if you can't relax, allow yourself to truly get into the sensations of self-stimulation, and let things flow naturally until the natural conclusion is reached.

I also have to wonder if you saying that you get bored is significant. Even women who know precisely what they need to be thinking of and doing (or having done to them) in order to orgasm can need up to twenty minutes of steady stimulation from a cold start in order to come. Maybe you're just being too goal-orientated, and what you need to do is relax in a comfortable, private place, experiment until you find some technique that feels nice, and just enjoy that for what it is, rather than focusing on how it has to lead to something spectacular, and believing that you'll have failed if it doesn't.

From what I've read and heard from women, the first time can be difficult, and many women pull back at what they later realise was exactly the wrong moment. It just feels like too much, when that's exactly what they need to push through in order to come. I think you should try not to be discouraged or allow yourself to believe it will never happen, since it sometimes needs quite a bit of experimental messing around before it does happen. Some women need to have a particular mental movie running in their head, while some like to read a particular type of erotic story, or watch some sort of porn.

I haven't looked, but I'm sure there must be good quality info and advice on the internet for women who are trying to figure out how to have their first orgasm.

Maybe you just aren't that into yourself, find someone else to masturbate and see what happens

I'm a female and I didn't have an orgasm from masturbation until I was 23 (I'm 35 now) and I had always thought there was something wrong with me. I had already had a vibrator for a couple of years at that point but turns out one day I used it a little differently and to this day that is how I do it all the time.

I think just trying different things would help. Everybody likes to do it differently, even if sometimes it seems a little bit weird. Just find what works for you, and it may take some time, but it may just come to you one day.

How about you just don't? That's my advice to you. Just don't.