I am disgusting
I feel ashamed for this and I feel that I will go to hell for this I want to be dominated by a white woman I want to be utterly humiliated. Like I mean I really want to be dominated by her in the most graphic way that you can think of I want her to hurt me beyond description.
If it a white woman who is older than me I want her to treat me like an abused step child and if she is near my age I want her to treat me like trash.
An example I have dreams of Lana from red ice tv violating/beating the crap out of me and calling me every derogatory name under the sun. I'm gross because it only gets deeper and deprived I often hit myself with a belt until my skin is red and I imagine that it's a white woman beating me.
I want to be a slave to white woman I don't know why but I really want to be one and I'm ashamed for feeling this way because it's clearly not normal to want what I want.
No real man would want what I want and I dishonor my ancestors for wanting to be subjugated and degraded.