I am attracted to my stepdaughter
Ok, this is serious and just starting to become a problem for me.
I have been married for a few years now and my wife is a little older than me. We haven't had any children of our own yet, but I have two wonderful stepchildren from my wife's previous marriage. One boy, still at high school and one girl (well, young woman now), a little older.
When my wife and I first met, her kids were a little younger and family life was fun. Not being their natural father hasn't been difficult as they are both great and really well mannered. It was always easy to get on with her children because my age and theirs is not that great (about the same difference as the age difference between my wife and I).
Time has passed and life goes on. My stepdaughter is now a young adult and is very attractive. The kind of attractive that makes all young men turn their heads, as well as some not so young ones.
Whereas I consider myself to be a carefully constrained person with a realistic view on sex and sexuality and a desire to remain faithful to my wife, I find it very difficult to prevent myself from noticing her beauty. We share a close personal relationship and I am impressed with the way that she has started to become a woman.
But that same closeness and progression on her part to an attractive young woman has my wife tied up in knots.
She tells me that she can see me 'checking her daughter out' from time to time, like when she's wearing loose or revealing clothing or seated in an 'inappropriate manner'. It's been a fear of my wife always that her younger husband will do something he shouldn't, but I strenuously deny any and all allegations of this nature.
To be honest, I have fantasized about her occasionally. I don't consider myself in imminent danger of sexually abusing my stepdaughter, but my wife is plainly correct. I have, subconsciously or, perhaps even consciously, 'checked her out'. I am certain that this is wrong, but there is a part of me that cannot help but notice. And lingers there for an instant.
More disconcertingly, my stepdaughter has a habit of looking at me engagingly - which I must admit, is most probably innocent of any intentions, but ours eyes meet from time to time in a way that perhaps they shouldn't. Her conversations with me are becoming a little intimate, in terms of her boyfriends and her 'secrets'.
My wife believes that she is getting confused and won't raise the subject with her, for fear of furthering the confusion, but believes that I can change the situation by acting in a more 'fatherly' manner.
I want to remain friendly and supportive of everyone involved. My question is, is this unusual ? My wife is correct (although I haven't told her so directly), I have some feelings that I shouldn't have for my stepdaughter.
And if this is common, what would you recommend for me to do in this situation ?
Thanks for reading,