I am attracted to my stepdaughter

About a year after the wife and I got divorced, her daughter (from a previous marriage) came to live by me. I had always had an attraction to her (shes now 24) but I knew nothing would ever come of it. It was difficult to have her in my house. Anyway I didnt know how to handle it so I spoke to her about it. Probably the best thing I could have done. Nothing ever happened between us and we are the only 2 out of my previous marriage that are still good friends.

I've said it before and will repeat it. It's a cruel act of nature that makes us desire young (healthy) specimens for procreation. It's totally normal. However, I think you have to ask yourself once you hit 40 what you can really offer a girl around half your age. Wisdom and financial security (maybe), both of which you can give them without having sex with them. One thing you can't give them is longevity. If you genuinely love them you let them be free to have a relationship with someone they can discover things with and grow old together. To date them and promise them a future is selfish and dishonest. So, by all means look but don't touch. You might not be sleeping with young, firm flesh but at least you'll sleep soundly for doing the right thing.

hi have been with my partner for the past 13 years i have just broke up with him as he went all the way he brought my 19 year old daughter up from the age of 7 and they were like father and daughter they had a relationship in my bed together i love my daughter and i love my partner please dont go any further it will reck your life like it has mine think of your wife my partner and daughter have also a son together please please dont put your feelings towards something else this is true what i have said

u got one fucked up family rollypolly. Damn.

I think you are misinterpreting the message being conveyed to you. I am researching where pedophilia, molestation, and desires for younger partners originate for this PHD and came across this site. I know it is older, but after reading this I have to say there is more judgement than advice.
I have married my soul mate after two failed marriages. What is sad about it is we have been friends since I was eight years old. She has three children and I have one. She has two daughters. These young ladies have been known to take me dress shopping(this includes whats under the dress), many lake trips where they choose me for the "rooster fights", walking around the house in various stages of undress to nude, breastfeeding around me, even giving each other massages. None of this is received as having any sexual undertone. What is being sent as a message of trust, security, and faith you are interpreting as erotic.
If this was existing only in your dreams, this conversation would take a whole new turn. Usually when someone dreams of having intercourse with a step-child it signifies they have accepted the nurturing and meeting the needs parental role. But this is more than dreams.
First off, when you say step- you are hyphenating their title. When you hyphenate you divide. Why would anyone willingly divide a functional family?
Understand, she is probably sending you a sign of a covenant of trust. She feels safe enough to confide anything in you, to even flirt with you, and to maybe tease you. This is because she trusts you.
I cant say if I were single and never met their mother because I cant imagine a world where I am not with my wife.
Most of the time when we as men have fantasies like this, its because something is lacking in our current relationship or the imagination would have no need to roam into other areas. Figure out whats missing or lacking in your current relationship.

I sincerely wish you the best with this. If you want to see what happens when this is acted upon, youtube any Jerry Springer episode as a start. I've seen what it does, about 99% of the time, it could be on Springer. Those kinds of odds, I offer two pieces of advice:

1. Betray the covenant, and you will betray your life.
2. Think with the head on your shoulders, not the one between your hips.

Best.

A lot of interesting perspectives here. Bottom line is that as men, its difficult not to notice beautiful women, just as we noticed our wives, and subsequently married them. Bringing a wife into one's life along with a stepdaughter who looks identical and is 20 years younger, would be temptation for any man. After all, if you were tempted by her mother, its not a stretch to be attracted by her adult offspring, as the "blood connection" is not there. However as somebody stated in these posts, the guarantee for action in this regard is that it cannot end any way but badly. So if the fantasy is that some emotional connection is going to be waged, great sex is on its way, and you'll feel complete, forget it. Heartbreak and shame will ultimately follow, even in the face of not acting on any of this. Simply communicating these feelings to the young respondent will be a death knell. My situation is simple. My wife is beautiful and her only child is the same. Twenty years is what separates them, but if I closed my eyes I would not be able to tell the difference between them, in voice, touch, scent, they both possess. Of course one assesses the beauty in women if you are a man. I am guilty. But acting on it? Voicing it? Nope. Not gonna happen, because its the wrong thing to do. I've chosen to love her like a father, because she never knew a father. In the 22 years I've known her, I've only wanted her to feel love from a man, where there are no conditions. She has always had significant attention from men, and no shortage of suitors. She has always gone for the older ones, because I believe she craved and needed a father figure in her life as she grew up. However, she needs somebody to love her, who has no expectations. This has been new for her and she was and has been very receptive. I love her dearly, would do anything for her, but when I look at her in a way that most men might, I only feel a sadness and kindness toward her. She doesn't need more BS in her life, she's happy, has a husband and two beautiful kids, who I am proud to be a grandfather to. To those who think that you want to invest emotionally and sexually in your stepdaughters, think again. Thats not what they need you for and its only in the end, to satisfy your own needs, which may I remind you, are just fantasies.

I have also been infected with this mental and sexual disease. I have exposed my dirty little secret to my girlfriend of 9 years who has a goddess, I mean 16 year old daughter. Our relationship is struggling. The daughter has been instructed to cover up in my presence but she can't hide her beauty. I'm not a threat of rape as I truly consider this a discrace that I couldn't live with, but I guess I could die? Be advised, pheromones have triggered my fantasies, she sweats this amazing smell that does definitely does not calm the savage beast! Don't be left alone in the house where you will be temped to get in her dirty laundry, actively council your mind, think of your hero's who wouldn't compromise their dignity because that would make them scum.
Anyway, to all of you who suffer from this, treat it like a disease, such as heart condition, and snap out of it or leave, this will kill you

Wow, You would think this poor guy killed somebody. I have a 34-year-old stepdaughter we are both divorced and lonely. She recently sent me a video of her bouncing in a bounce house with her beautiful 36 triple D chest going up and down. I continually catch her staring at my package and it all confuses me. She is not my blood and makes me think what would be wrong with it?
I am 110% against anything to do with underage children or stepchildren. They should be locked up. But in this case you're talking about two consenting adults in their 30s and 50s and in my opinion if two people love each other what's wrong with it? A society that excepts gay relationships, transgender's and other lifestyles should be OK with this.
#confused

Merlin you have a problem!!! Go see someone that can help you!!! Also you really don't love your wife either. And your not normal. Don't confuse feelings of lust with love!!! Cause lust is all it is. You have let it consume you. I'm sure it's on your mind all the time. I keep thinking how your wife feels. I bet she doesn't feel good enough for you. Just know you have destroyed the way your wife feels about you and it will keep destroying her!!! I mean..... WOW!!! What is wrong with you guys!!!!

I really appreciate Merlin for the post and what onehandinthehoneyjar wrote. First of all I was in a situation like this but I was the teenage girl my stepfather lusted after. My mother divorced him, and I havent seen him since. Here's my side of the story. My stepfather was in war as a young man and my mother says he never really knew how to love. When they were married he use to stare at me, not in a happy appreciative way, but a volture shadowy way that lasted for Longer than necessary. At the time I hated his creepy stares, and on occasion yell at top of my lungs "what r u staring at" so my oblivious mother would hear. That was how I protected myself from his intrusively prying eyes. I hated him, and felt disgusted by him for at that time an unknown reason. He was never obvious with his lust so it's not like I can ever say anything he did was wrong. he made comments like....I'm curious what a girl growing into a lady's like, and that once I grew up he believes I would drive men crazy with desire. And there was a time I had to b alone with him in a trailer for 5 days before my mom arrived and I was on best behavior bc I was afraid of him and what he's capable of. In his family history his 80 year old dad screwed the live in help that was hired to care for the dad and this is how his parents divorced. This was 20 years ago, and now 20 years later I'm on a journey of self healing which opened up old undelt with issues and thus this forum. I realized that he was a tortured soul and I felt guilty for being so dismissive with him based on the fact that he was not my real father. I felt at the time if I was nice to him I would be betraying my real dad. In order to forgive him and myself, I psychologically opened up a channel of love which inadvertently brought to my consciousness lust, sextuality And association with him. I think that we as humans are in a sense all psychic, and whatever thoughts he projected was received and put away in my memory bank as trauma to be dealt with later and that later came 20 years later in the form of stepfather daughter lust fantasies. I never use to believe when bible said that u r committing adultery for even thinking Bout thy neighbors wife but only recently after I met a man who was able to feel all my thoughts and emotions from a distAnce did I know this is possible and in fact normal if u are becoming an enlightened being. Anyway for the past 7 years I started entertaining thoughts of stepfather fantasies. And it's making me confused and obsessive. Just to include my mother had a previous boyfriend before him and I never got this vibe from him, just that I didn't like him trying to take my dads place. So to make the story short, yes these thoughts are actions despite no one consciously knowing, but subconsciously we all can feel this. I need to find peace with this so I can understand myself and put this behind. I do believe that Merlin u r normal and lots men face this, and I applaud u for trying to face it and voice it. I think society is harsh on people rather than trying to understand. His lust for me shaped my sexuality growing up and now bc I am trying to give love to all the things in my life I felt i needed to embrace and love that part of my life experience which is what has put me in the same turmoil u felt. It's like he transferred his stuff and info to me and now I recognize they have not originated from me. I can tell u r a wonderful human being and on looking back so was my stepfather. The devil does put sinful thoughts in people's heads to torment them. The way that onehandinthehoneyjar said it put tears in my eyes, because choosing c one can realize they are normal, and it's ok to be pestered with these thoughts, but bringing it to the light is when the scary dark thoughts disappears. Shining gods light on these dark recesses of our minds. If there are people we can confess and feel safe to talk about it it will help. Reading these posts is very healing for me. U r not wrong for having these feelings, but it's much more chhvarious to understand yourself and how Devils implants thoughts, and protect this beautiful vibrant being with your riteous actions of true love for her and yourself. I can imagine Chris rock the comedian saying, " get out of here with ur sexy ass, and put some more clothes on." if u felt the seduction of ur Stepdaughter and make this energy positive truthful and free up that shackle that binds the mind. Find peace with self through understanding and greater love. Thank you so much for your post. God be with you.

Okay, this is sick... I am an attractive female and my mother has been married a few times and all of her husbands have been attracted to me and I am disgusted by it. It is hard for me to say, "Hey creep, you know you are married to my mother" as I don't want to hurt my mothers feelings, but that's what I want to say..

The current one stands behind me in the kitchen sometimes when I am making my plate for dinner and I cringe, but I can't say anything because it would upset my mother. What's really sad is these men are so stupid, they convince themselves I like them. I try to avoid them, speak in an uninterested tone, but it's obvious it goes right over their head because they want to believe some fantasy about me liking them..

Unless you have a face and body and bank account like Ryan Gosling, trust me, your young attractive step daughter is just being nice and you are stupid, extremely selfish and really gross. Accept this and do your wife a favor and leave.. She deserves better than your disgusting grossness!

I'm curious...are you still or have you ever been attracted to your wife?

you are a great man with terrific will power most men are weak but im proud of you. be a great step father and do more with your wife. dont throw it all away.

There is nothing abnormal about this. You don't have the Westermark effect with her:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Imprinting_(psychology)#Westermarck_effect

It is psychologically documented that this WILL happen when two people are not biologically related and met when both of them were over the age of 6. It is how attraction works.

And I have to be honest: I also don't think there would be anything wrong with sleeping with her if both of you wanted to. There is no reason why you would have to leave your wife or anything crazy like that. Your wife is obviously your primary partner and you obviously care about her very much.

Think about it. Sex is the only arena in which we PUNISH people for loving someone. How is it wrong to make someone else feel good? How is it wrong to have a mutual affectionate relationship with someone?

We only force these rules on ourselves because of cultural prejudice and superstition. But there is no scientific basis for thinking that having sex with anyone has to ruin anything unless someone gets pregnant or gets an STD.

Nobody can understand this man like someone whos in the same position, Like me! Yeah man, I live with my gf and her 20 year old daughter. She has a nice body and lusious curves that I look at all the time. But shes young and doesn't know how to satisfy man. Shes young and very inexperienced. You see man, you want a full woman, not just the sex. Can she clean? Cook? Wash your dirty smelly clothes? She needs to do more then just stand there and look pretty. If you dont wanna deal with the temptation, get divorce and marry a younger chick if thats what you want in life. We all change as we get older and wiser, our way of thinking. One thing though, just keep your mind on the aftermath of what could if you slept with her. I mean... The sex will last a only few months before you get eventually get caught, but the divorce will last a lifetime. Lets say you do run away with her to another state or country. She'll always come back to her mom when gets tired of you cause theyre blood and you cant separate them. Next time you'll know not to date a chick with kids period after all that! Especially a chick with older kids. So man... its not worth it, your only attracted to the physical, not the soul of the woman. Shes so young what can she know about satisfying a man? All she can do is stand there and look good and looks eventually fade. And when the going gets tough, you'll never know if she'll is bail out on you cause shes so young. So if you care about your marriage, stay away, if you dont care, go a head and sleep with her.. I can guarantee one thing, it won't be a happy ending. Your wife be so hurt and it would shatter all the lovely memories you have together. Meditate on it! Meditation will be good for you! To chase that lust away from you. Thats what I do.

(Update)
So I broke down and confessed to my stepdaughter my feelings, probably not long after posting here. She just said okay and she kinda knew it already, it was like no big deal. That was it... for the time being. We continued on with the status quo, and eventually I got to the point where I just wanted to forget I ever said anything and accept my role, despite my feelings not going anywhere. Still had moments that felt sexually tense, or flirty and I'd catch her staring at me, but whatever.

Fast forward almost a yr and a half later. I was minding my business one day and she texted me out the blue from her bedroom asking me if I remembered what I told her. I played dumb because I knew what she was talking about but was scared of what might come next. Well... she basically said she hadn't stopped thinking about what I told her, and that the feeling is indeed mutual. She had peeped the bulge in my shorts and wanted to see what it felt like, and I wanted to see what she tasted like. I called her to where I was to be sure she wasn't bs'ing and we kissed. We fooled around and fondled and panties got changed in between but ultimately, had sex 3 quick times. She'd get wet like no tomorrow but most times, I couldn't easily get hard because I'm turned on but thinking "this is nuts, her mom/my wife is sleep on the other side of the house." Not the way I fantasized about this happening. I'm like why didn't you say something back when we had the house to ourselves a lot more, and could've fooled around all day? Not the pandemic when were all cooped up and have to sneak around. I'm telling her about all the times we'd be home by ourselves and I watch her walk into the bathroom to shower and I'm wishing I could follow and she's like "you couldve."

Soon after, my wife turned the jets on and started doing stuff for me and her, and my SD said we'd have to chill out because she was catching feelings and starting to get jealous. She soon caught covid cabin fever, got a new job and decided to get her own apartment and move in with her girlfriend (yeah she's bi).

Things are now sort of normal, we dont communicate much unless she comes around but that probably would've happened either way. We texted a lot once things got started and until she moved out, and to me, it felt like a real relationship. I had passion I had been missing for so long.

My marriage is lackluster, my heart isn't all the way in it but I don't want to raise our kid on the weekends so I stick it out and go through the motions. I do love her, she's type A but a good woman and she tries, but I often feel as though I married the wrong person. With my stepdaughter, I've felt drawn to her feminine energy even when she was in grade school, before I felt anything sexual. Times when I would be out with her almost felt like we were a couple (when she was older of course), other people would make that mistake, and even my kid was small and said once that we'd act like more like a couple (during harmless interactions) compared to me and his mom. If I found myself single, I'd hope that we could pick up where we left off and do it the right way. Part of me does feel like a dirt bag, but I'm human, full of my own struggles and needs, and that part of me is glad I fulfilled the fantasy and felt alive again. It's been almost 2 years, we both agreed that it's going to the grave and so far its just something that happened that doesn't come up, but I'm sure she thinks about it just as I do, and maybe one day, who knows.

Part of me also thinks maybe she was just needing her immediate needs met, since her mom made her quarantine and was cut off from her life. Either way I guess we both got what we wanted, and since I can't ride off into the sunset with her, at least I had her for a moment in time, which is more than I ever thought possible.

Wake her up with your tongue deep inside her wet Pussy. It’s really hard for them to deny that they want that.

Quit denying it and see where it goes. If you’re as lucky as me she will give you her blessing

I’d eat her out and fuck her real good and see where it goes. I ate my stepdaughter out and we fuck constantly. Every time my wife leaves the house we are at it like a bunch of fucking rabbits and we have been caught and it’s no longer a secret. My wife gets a little jealous but hey she is a great fuck as well. Wish they would both do it at the same time though.

My wife and stepdaughter both know my feelings for my stepdaughter, I have eaten her out so many times I can’t even count them. She refuses to let me fuck her now when I’m eating her out I just fantasize about thrusting my cock on her pregnant young pussy. She’s legal and sexually active when I’m not running the boys off

I think it's perfectly normal to be attracted to your stepdaughter. You're a heterosexual male. You're living in the same home with a young woman who probably shares some of the same physical attributes of the woman you married. It totally makes sense to find your stepdaughter attractive, just don't act on it.

My stepdaughter is gorgeous,and I sometimes catch myself admiring her beauty, especially when she's wearing her tight little shorts or one of her tiny, belly-exposing shirts, but that's as far as it goes. I know I could never bring myself to actually DO anything. She looks up to me, and it would destroy our family

I need advice I have wanted to have sex with my step daughter for many years. My late wife her mother was turned on by my desire to have sex with her daughter.she is now 23 and I truly believe that she has had the same feelings for me science she was about 14. Should I just come out and tell her?

I know this is super old, but searching online this seems to be the most sane place to get my own thoughts out. I am in a similar situation as Merlin was. I'm in my late 30's, I keep myself up, fairly "hip" and my wife is very attractive. Me and my now wife have been together since her daughter was 9, she's now 17, and my attraction has grown stronger the older she gets.

The girl is a goddess in my book, the perfect specimen of what I'm attracted to. She is biologically a grown woman, and wish I could flip the "off" switch, but I can't. We also catch eyes often, I can be minding my business, turn abruptly, and catch her looking, or she'll turn to look as I am... but other than that, not much in the outright flirting business. We may throw jokes back and forth, and lately she's confided in me more details about her life than she does her mom and her biological dad (yes, he's around a bit), and recently she even asked me why I don't tell her mom about the things she tells me. I wanted to say, "because I'm crazy about you," but I just took the high road and said something to the effect of wanting to give her a safe space away from the "tyranny" of her mom and her part time biological dad.

Backing up a bit, she lost her virginity to a grown man which clearly was a big issue (as for him too!), she can be sneaky, so her mom's extreme reactions to her are not without merit. Honestly I found myself jealous of this man, and as stupid as he was, I've fell down the same rabbit hole mentally speaking. I get jealous at any interaction he has with the opposite sex. My wife is sort of the jealous type, half-jokingly giving us the side eye if we team up against her or laugh over what seems to be an inside joke. I wouldn't say she truly suspicious of any wrongdoing, but she perhaps notices any extra attention we should show each other.

But, my wife can be a tyrant, and sometimes we both need to rationalize it in private, and sometimes the girl needs someone to stick up for her mom is being irrational. It does obviously put me in a bad spot because it suddenly looks like I'm always throwing my cape on for her daughter (I always try to stay unbiased and fair, however), and they have that "I love you but can't stand you" type of relationships.

Nonetheless, when me and her are together by ourselves, I feel like everything I've ever wanted to tell her is on the tip of my tongue. I feel a tension, not sure if it's all in my head or not. I honestly don't know what she would say if I told her how enamored I am with her. I can waste a whole day just fantasizing about her, how intimacy could be initiated, how I can slip in my feelings without being obvious, or even just spoiling her like an old sugar daddy... Sometime I say just wait til she's 18, at least if the chips fall, there's no jail and record at play. Today after a long text exchange revolving around suspicions of a boy around our house (whom she's been downplaying their communications), I had to tell her to delete the messages as I didn't want to show I had prior knowledge in case she's actually engaged in something she gets busted for, and I didn't want my wife to see us having long text threads during the day while I'm at work and she's in or out of school.

I feel like things have gone slightly deeper, just asking her to delete messages. It's to the point where there's a whole back channel of communication behind my wife's back, minor incidents only we know about, but enough that it would appear damning in my interests towards her. I really don't want to keep peeling back layers of the onion, but I'm almost powerless. If that girl ever openly came on to me I would be unable to resist, a kiss from her would be like a glass of cold water after wandering the desert lost. This evil little voice in my head tells me to make a move before some random boy at school gets all of her thoughts.

I will admit that me and my wife need more intimacy. That could be the problem. That young energy does seem a lot more appealing than my "acting-older-than-she-is," stuck in day to day boredom wife. I stand in her doorway sometimes fumbling, trying to start a conversation, probably like some of the teenage boys she deals with at school. She has to know that I am indeed actually flirting with her, as harmless and G rated as I make it. I understand the implications and the shame that may follow this recipe for disaster for all of us plus the other 2 boys we have together. And telling my wife is out of the question. I often remind myself of Kevin Spacey in American Beauty at times, except it's my stepdaughter!

I've also read up on this bit, and seen how it is more normal than most prudes would admit. I found an article flat out warning men to stay away from women with daughters for this very reason.

My venting is done, time to go home and maybe have sex with my wife to relieve some of this energy I have. More than likely this will be something I'll just have to take to the grave, or despite this essay of love and lust I just posted, I will really continue to back down when given a chance to push the boundaries, like a time we did a quick truth or dare, she picked dare, and I all but changed the subject.

Just go ahead and fuck the shit out of her, make that young strumpet bounce on your hard cock and come so hard that it drips down onto your balls. She's knows what she's doing, and she's doing it on purpose. she wants to fuck you just as bad as you want to fuck her, so wait for your wife to leave, pull her aside, tell her how you feel, unbutton your pants, pull out your dick and tell her to hop on it and watch what happens. I was attracted to my stepdaughter, she was always walking around the house with these little bitty shorts on you know the kind where you can see the bottom of the butt cheek, or sit on the couch with her legs cocked open to where I could see her barely Harry pussy, or where these tank tops with no bra on where her perky tits was almost viewable through the shirt, and her soft little nipples with pop out. So one day my wife was gone, and it was just her and I, she had on those little shorts and I told her that she shouldn't be walking around the house like that, and she said why? And I said because I have a hard time not looking, and she said I know you look at me and I also know that you think about me when you touch yourself. And I told her I've had dreams about her and touching all over her body. She told me that you had dreams about me too, and that she touches herself and thinks about me. I told her that I would touch her so she didn't have to fantasize about it, then she straddled me and we kissed so passionately and I felt her on skin and grab your big ol booty and she stood up and I pull the shorts off, and I pulled my pants down to my ankles and sat back down on the couch she straddled once again, and I grabbed both of her ass cheeks I lifted her up and slit her down right on my dick. Her pussy was so tight, so warm and so wet that I almost busted a nut after three Strokes but I grabbed her and I stopped her and I kissed on her brest and her neck and her lips. I didn't want to come too fast so I laid her down on the couch and I looked her pussy and play with their tits at the same time, she came so hard that is squirting all over the leather couch. And I told her that to move to the bedroom, we went into the bedroom and she lay down on the bed and I climbed on top of her who put my dick inside her, I don't think I've ever felt a pussy that warm, anyway I'm doing small Strokes and kissing on her chest and neck I was so close to coming just by having my dick inside her it was insane. So I slid down started eating your pussy again just to give myself some time to calm down, ate her pussy for a while and I let her come a couple of more times and then she grabbed my arms and pulled me towards her and she said please fuck me. So I'm back on top of it and started fucking or again and then right as I'm feeling it build up I pulled out of her and told her to turn over doggy style she turned over and I just gave just as an amazing ass she had as well as a pretty ass pussy, your slim waist, well-defined back and then I start to eat her pussy from behind and I licked her ass. Finally I was able 2 make the feeling that I was going to ejaculate subside, then I grabbed her by the hips polder little closer to me slid my dick inside of her and I begin to pound her ass in the doggy style position. After she had about two orgasms, just sound of her moaning in her pussy squeezing my dick tighter with each orgasm, I finally released the most explosive orgasm I have ever had in my life, it was like it drain my whole body from head to toe, I stood there well it literally it was like steady stream of come for like a good 30 seconds oh, then I fell on the bed still kind of shivering and shaking from the feeling that orgasm. She laid her head on my chest and she told me she had been thinking about having sex with me since she was about 17, mind you she was 19 when we had intercourse, anyway she said she's been thinking about having sex with me since she was about 17 and that it was everything that she expected. That was the first and the last time we had ever had sex, but it was the most amazing sex I've ever had in my life. She's about 26 now, she's engaged and she has one child, we've been hiding the secret from her mother since the day that we had sex. We've made a pact to never tell her mom what we did, so far so good. I suggest that you go ahead and tell her how you feel, and maybe she'll talk to you about it and that will be that or maybe, just maybe she feels the same way and wants to get it off of her chest and it may lead to some amazing sex, because between my stepdaughter and I that sexual tension had been there forever and once we both was able to release it, we both felt better and we both agreed that we had to get that out of the way so we can be normal towards each other and it worked. I hope it works out for you my friend, and I also hope that you talk to her about it and get over it or you get some absolutely amazing sex out of the whole thing. Good luck....

My Step Daddy has always had a massive Hardon for My Sisters since before they had nice sets of titties and hair on their Pussys

I found this thread as I was looking on the web for advice/answers.I'm 50 yrs old and my ex girlfriends daughter is 24. Her mom and I lived together for 8 years and we are still friends,but no longer together. Although we never married,her daughter still considered me as a
"Stepdad" because her biological father was not in the picture that much. Her daughter and I have a good relationship and here's the kicker... she still lives in my home. she has a very hot body and is beautiful. I've had a bit of a crush on her for sometime now and I think she knows this.
She walks around the house in skimpy clothing or in just a towel after showering,she'll try on different bikinis and ask my opinion on which one to wear. One time she got a new pair of yoga pants and said feel how soft the material is while she was wearing them. She just walks in my room when door is closed without notice or knocking first (does she want to catch me doing something?) my physical attraction for her is getting stronger everyday.
I have made little comments here and there "you're killin me" "you have a nice butt" "you're a hottie ". When we talk she always rubs her stomach or back raising her shirt to expose her stomach or lower back and will occasionally gaze at my crotch. it's to the point now that all I think about when we are together is having sex with her,making love to her. I mean I know she's into guys her age but what is she doing? What does she want? when she asked me to feel her yoga pants did she want my hand somewhere? I want to tell her about my attraction to her or just make a move on her, but am afraid of what her response might be,and don't want to jeapordise the relationship we have now and feel awkward afterwards,or for her to react like eww and tell her mother and I look like the creepy ex boyfriend that hit on her daughter.
I am consumed with the thought of her body and sleeping with her,ugh
Any advice would be appreciated, especially any younger woman that can shed light on what her intentions may be with her actions

I know this is an old threat but these issues continue to happen. My story is a bit different than most. I married my wife in 1998 from another country. In September that year during the immigration process my wife fell pregnant by her old boyfriend she was with prior to me. As expected I took it hard and withdrew my petition for her.

After 7 years we began communicating again. By that time she now had a boy and the girl from the first pregnancy. After review of everything including spending most of my 20's alone, lack of relationship success and sexually oppressed I gave her another chance.

She would end up making it here 6 years later. Meanwhile I tried everything to find someone else and to keep my options open. Again with no success. It seems that I was the nice guy that truly finished last.

After three years, the son and daughter came. Daughter 14 son 12. And now is where it starts getting complicated.

When the daughter was 15 she purposely saw me naked out of the shower and used the excuse that she was getting something. I just thought no big deal I guess now she knows what a penis looks like. Now 17 I discovered she listening to me shower, have caught her listen to me masturbate. She has masturbated loudly moaning my name.

At this point I knew full well what was happening. I knew she was attractive but kept that to myself. She is sexually attracted to me. I thought about what to do about it for a month. I decided to talk to the mom about it. Her response was not was I was expecting. She simply said "well you are handsome" and said nothing more. As if she didn't care if I fucked her. For being 48 she either knows full well this was going to happen or she is an idiot of epic proportions. At this point my head is hurting from all the thoughts going through.

For months I fought relentless sexual thoughts about her. The fact that the mere thought of having sex made me so horny and hard and blew the biggest loads. It was all too much for me who at 39 had 3 sexual partners(the mom, 1 relationship 1 one night stand.) it was too much for someone that rarely gets sexual interest reciprocated. We ended up acting on it. And the sex is amazing. She no longer camps out in her room fearing rejection, she has gained a tremdous amounts of self confidence and she has more pep to her steps instead of a depressed walk since many her age doesn't find her sexually appealing because she doesn't have big boobs or find her "hot" since she is introverted she is viewed as a loner much like me.

Now 6 months later I'm fighting a new battle. Now that the "wife" had made it here she is at an age where natural pregnancy is unrealistic, and unable to financially try ivf. With me getting the fatherhood itch, I struggle with what to do. Do I get the daughter pregnant? Do I use a donor egg from someone I don't know? Do I end everything and chuck it up to a lost cause to my life? Do I just accept the fact being a real father wasn't in the cards in my life? Do I try and fight like finishing a marathon just to end up with a baby with severe problems?

For those who questioned me just ask yourself this. Who was the one who cheated that created a 14 year immigration process? Am I to blame for countless of women that found me unattractive either financially, physically that I was put in this position. I'm not some loser that had nothing to offer. I never done any drugs, don't smoke, can hold a steady job, don't have s criminal record, never been arrested or incarcerated. So I can honestly so I truly was a nice guy who finished dead last .

I can't believe I'm actually going to talk or write about this topic and the feelings I've had/have for my own stepdaughter. The attraction you have for her will not go away anytime soon. I know my attraction for my stepdaughter started when I first met her at 16 and I was 32 dating her mom. she was a petite, lovely young hispanic girl very well endowed in areas of the breast like her mom and buttocks. Without getting to graphic her hips to waist ratio was unbelievable, didn't seem real something out of a comic book but there it was in all of its perfection. There she was. Instant and forever attraction that doesn't stop to this day some 20+ years later. She didn't live with us during her high school years so she was in and out of our lives cross country during that time. It wasn't until we moved to Ca close to her and her father around the time she was 18 going on 19. We lived close to her father so she was over very often for dinner and day/night long visits. It was at this time the attraction we had for each other grew very strong. Engaging eye contact, little flirtations, revealing comments, physical contact horse-play, all part of the interactions we had at the time. Her mom didn't seem to notice that much and actually seemed like she condoned it somewhat never stepping in so to speak. She could tell I was attracted to her as I enjoyed talking about her often even after she had left' the house, how pretty she was, her long hair, perfect body. She can have anybody she wants and shouldn't settle for just any blow joe' would be my final statements more or less to keep it in context of complimentary as opposed to sexual, but she knew what I really meant and it didn't seem to matter much. She knew I'd never act on it and seemed pleased to know I noticed what I noticed about her. Twenty years fast forward living in another state she visits twice a year to visit us with her husband and 3 kids. We still manage to find ourselves separated from the others talking heart to heart with each other, getting closer but never too close. It's a great feeling. She's still very beautiful at 32 more so I think, her mom and I now married to me is beautiful too but aging of course. My step daughter still has a hips to waist ratio that could stop a Mack truck dead in its tracks and hair and nails for miles. She's a woman's woman in her young adulthood and I can truly say that I love her as she is the sweetest non-self centered, giving person I ever met. I don't expect that I would make any other advancement but it's still nice to catch her looking at me deep in some thought from time to time. I lock eyes onto hers and she smiles and I think at that moment we must both be agreeing that we would have been great for each other and then it suddenly stops at the cry of one of her children in need or something to that effect. It's good to have that feeling from somebody you truly adore step-daughter or not. I'm just glad we continue to share portions of our life together going forward into the future. With all of that, believe me I'm never far from the on-going fantasy of having passionate sex with her. I'm certain she knows it but doesn't seem to offend her. At times I can tell she's bothered by it so I stop with the flirtatious comments or my gazing, doting looks but then at other times I think she teases me parading around in her sparse, revealing jammas before bed time when the kids and her husband are asleep while watching a late night with me. Still though, I think it's all good and I let the feelings I have for her be the ties that make us closer. Maybe though, just maybe, one day ...ok, now I've said too much. Bottom line I think it's normal. She's not really your blood so it's only natural unless you're well not alive. Clearly not the case. Live with it love it and cherish it. Lots of really great feelings to come from it that doesn't have to become sexual or other. Good luck.

My s/daughter is 23. She is a fucking hot red head. She's living with me n wife. She has no boyfriend. I would love to do nothing more than just eat that pussy. She seems very frigid so I have little if any hope. I always give compliments etc. I know it's a long term game so u never know but I'm realistic so we'll see............

This is full of FANTASY nonsense with some spouting about this not only being OK but enjoyable -- it is NOT OK! Period. Children sexually mature and do not know what to do with the feelings or make sense of them for years. You are in a position NOT to exploit this vulnerable time to healthy, normal sexual development of a CHILD. If any of you were married to me you would be hung out to pasture by your johnsons and EVERYONE would be told about your lack of character, decency and boundaries. You think the daughter would actually want to DO something with you? If so, then she is too immature to understand consequences and it is our role as guardians to ensure her transition to adulthood does not result in the life-long distrust of males because of the behavior of the most trusted in her life. It only takes one person to make sure things stay good, that is the one who must contain their behavior (what are the basic laws of decency for?), and act in a custodial manner which will not destroy the happiness of so many... Grow up.

As long as you don't act on these thoughts, you're not a bad person. For your own sake and for the sake of innocent children whose bodies no one as the right to use for their own pleasure, it would be best to talk to someone professional so you can get to the root of why you feel this and you can move on with your life and be happy.

I'm the step daughter in this situation. My step father and I are 10 years apart, I'm 18. He and my mother are 8 years apart, she's older. My mother and I are very different. I'm known to be smarter and thinner. She's more wise but I'm wise beyond my years as well. She has noticed his strange behaviors when he tickles me or randomly hugs me. He never touched me in a sexual matter but he's made it very obvious by telling me how beautiful I am and that if he were to be my age he would be chasing me like other guys of my age do. We're very close, closer than the relationship we both have with my mother. I suppose it's because we're EXTREMELY alike in our actions, knowledge, humor and state of mind. He told me he has dreams of me and almost came close to revealing his feelings but he fears of me telling my mom which I'd never do because she's not mentally stable. I have had feelings in the past but I try my best to push away those feelings. I'm scared of the truth for two reasons. I may never see him the same way I see him now as it may be awkward and two I'm not sure what actions may come about.

Nature says they're legal when they get a few pie hairs...who am I to argue with pie hairs

Hi Merlin,
I don't see a date on this post, so I'm not sure how old it is. Can I respectfully comment on this? Please, at all costs get a hold of your mind and thoughts and save your life and your marriage. First of all, what is normal? Let me sum this up, the thought of all of this going on in your mind and what you are building this up to be - or could be - is psychologically stimulating you and putting you on an adrenaline high. This is nothing shy of the same process that goes on with viewing pornography. There are people who are actual "junkies" whereby they actually injest substances into their bodies to get a "high" and than there are those who live in their thoughts and mind and build things up to get a huge high. People do this in all kinds of ways, risk taking, sporting events, shopping for women, etc. The mental process you are taking yourself through is the exact same path a person takes when they have an affair. It's all the pre-thoughts and actions of "having the affair" that create stimulation and excitement, yet once they have the affair after a few times, the thrill is over. Save yourself and your life and get control over your mind. Either you control your mind or your mind controls you. I feel for you and if you are smart you will go into a Love and Sex support group and get a hold of this. It may be your step daughter today, but trust me, it will be somebody else tomorrow. I hope this helps.

Do not have sex with her...it could destroy your life. However, according to former President Clinton, eatin' ain't cheatin' so....nom nom nom nom.............

I have been married to my wife whom I love very much. When I first met her 22, at the time, old daughter she was married, but having marriage problems and flirting with be big time. After she left her husband she stayed with us. I caught her looking through a crack in the bathroom to see me naked among other things. Our computers were side by side and she would show me for example a photo of horses having sex thongs like that. I have always been faithful, never cheated in my life. I am in my mid 40's now and she is 29. I married an older woman. But, I am so attracted to her daughter that I can actually feel heat when we bump or brush against each other. She used to walk around tue house when it was just us there in her panties or q towel and bend over in front of me. It is the most difficult practice of self control that I have ever experienced. Her newest boyfriend looks like me in my late 20's.

merlin, you are a very genuine and smart guy. you think deeply. you care about people. it's obvious. it's no wonder that you attract to you women who are attractive themselves. however, there is something here that many tend to look past though... and that is that even with all of what I said above being true (you being a good man caring about others, including your wife), you still are strongly attracted to your wife's daughter. in fact, it vexes you so deeply, that you come to a forum called "isitnormal" to seek the opinion of others.

here is what i gather regarding this. it is absolutely normal. and in fact, it makes perfect sense. and that is where we, as a society, have fallen short of being able to honestly deal with these types of scenarios in a sensible manner. answers and comments here elude to you detroying your marriage if you engage physically with your step daughter, or that you will crush your wife's heart.

what's interesting about the whole thing, and what so many people struggle with, is that there is only one reason on planet earth that you have chosen to suppress these desires and ignore them. fear. period. fear of what? fear of destroying relationships of the people you care about the most. and the fear of believing that if you do, and certain people "find out", that your hard earned reputation could be ruined. the reputation that you are a good, caring man. nowhere in the aftermath will people "give you credit" for being vexed over and not acting on your desires for so long. that effort will not equate to "caring" in the minds of 99% of people, unfortunately. no, instead you'd likely be immediately regarded as a cheating bastard, with no conscious or care for those you love. ironic, isn't it?

if a good, caring man struggles with this as you do (and you are one of many), then perhaps "people" (society) are off base in how they usually respond to these types of scenarios. perhaps their own shortcomings or misguided feelings of jealousy and/or insecurity incidently block (or at least tremendously complicate) these types of natural situations between two people who desire to be have imtimacy in their relationship but cannot because of the taboo nature of their situation.

you either A) try to supress and ignore, whilst hoping for the best, or B) risk a secret physical engagement, hoping it will remain secret forever so as not to "hurt" those you believe might be hurt by it, or C) bring it out into the open to both your wife and your stepdaughter. be transparent, and brutally honest, with clear and caring communication, and see what they both say.

Some choose A, and we never know about it. They go their whole lives denying themselves of what they want so badly. Some choose B. If you are a celebrity or public figure, and you chose B, you end up on the news, and you are automatically a scandalous, terrible person.

I can guarantee you one thing. Chosing C) would probably not be as painful as you might fear, and might actually take a huge weight off, and might actually result in a mutally agreed situation, if all cards fall into place by everyone.

cheers,
honeyjar