Tinybird: I've been thinking about what you have said, and am confused.
I had the impression that you went shopping, went to movies, events, ate food when out of the house, and did many of the normal activities that other people do (and those activities require that you have some spending money)
Yet you seem to indicate in this conversation that you seem to be helpless and cannot do anything normal in life.
Can you please explain: Was my vision of you wrong?
Yes, I hardly go out of the house at all, except to the local park, or if my mum takes me somewhere, which is very rare. The only other place I ever get to go is my dad's land where we keep the horses and chickens.
So basically the only place I ever go is the local park or to the land.
On the rare occasion I do get to go somewhere else, I'm not the one paying for it. This year I went to a concert my brother got me tickets for, a sea safari that my mum paid for, the cinema that my mum paid for, the village carnival that I don't know if you have to pay for, and the beach and cinema when my brother was visiting. But even that is way more than I usually get to go anywhere.
I understand a bit now. I was rather introverted myself when I was younger. But I did get out and do things.
At age 12 I started shoveling snow and mowing lawns for money - and in fact purchased virtually all of my own cloths after that (I grew up in poverty - my parents did not have money for a lot of things - all of us kids learned to work for money somehow at about age 12 - 13).
My friendships were few. But I did have friends. I casually dated a few gals; but the fact is that I was virgin until age 27 when I found someone who was looking for more than just fun and sex, and who was not of the opinion that we could just try marriage and get a divorce if there were problems (there are problems in all long term relationships and marriages - I needed someone who agreed that we worked out problems and divorce was only the last option). Now I'm willing to do a "situational" relationship with the intent that its long term (with 2 stated exceptions related to personal sexual fantasies).
OK - it makes since. Here is my advice:
1) Using your birth certificate get a government ID. In the USA even the mentally incompetent and criminals in prison can get a government ID as long as they are over I believe age 16 in all States (Age 16 being when Drivers Licenses can be issued - and the Department of Motor Vehicles also issues ID cards for people who are not licensed to drive).
2) Tell your parents and other family members that you would like to learn to handle money (at least for minor things in life), and could you have a weekly or monthly "allowance." Tell them you would also like to learn how to buy groceries as well - and if they would fund you for grocery trips. Note that they are likely going to want to monitor how you are spending money and to assist you to learn things at least for a while.
As part of this you can set up a bank account and get most likely a Debit Card (which withdraws money from your bank account - and is not a credit card).
You will have to learn to save and budget as part of handling money.
Please keep me posted on your progress. I expect that you could get an ID card within a few days (or so).
It's what I do... I personally believe that my purpose on this earth is to assist other people. I learned long ago that giving money almost never produces any long term change (it might produce temporary relief). So I work on assisting people in other ways.
Well we tried to get me a bank account, but there was always some problem, we went to like 5 banks and there was always some problem so we couldn't do it.
Keep trying - ask what the problem is, and work to fix it.
There are always a solution - if you keep trying.
The difference between a winner and a looser is that a winner keeps trying no matter how many losses they suffer. Loosing and learning lessons from loosing is the only way you become a consistent winner in any fair competition.
A looser is a looser only because they quit.
I believe that you can be a winner in life Tinybird. So keep trying, and always ask what the problem is and how can it be fixed. Some bank out there has a solution.
When my wife was visiting from Ukraine and we decided to get married I wanted her to open a bank account in her name. Most of the local banks were not set up to open a bank account using the information from a foreign passport and a temporary immigration document from the USA Immigration Service (I live in a fairly small community).
I had to find a national bank chain in the next city over that had branches in cities with universities that had lots of foreign students. Their internal forms were set up to be able to use a foreign passport and the temporary immigration document as identification documents to open an account. It just was not worth it for the smaller state and local banks and credit unions to set up for that possibility.
I am a 25 year old female who has never kissed
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Tinybird: I've been thinking about what you have said, and am confused.
I had the impression that you went shopping, went to movies, events, ate food when out of the house, and did many of the normal activities that other people do (and those activities require that you have some spending money)
Yet you seem to indicate in this conversation that you seem to be helpless and cannot do anything normal in life.
Can you please explain: Was my vision of you wrong?
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Tinybird
10 months ago
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Yes, I hardly go out of the house at all, except to the local park, or if my mum takes me somewhere, which is very rare. The only other place I ever get to go is my dad's land where we keep the horses and chickens.
So basically the only place I ever go is the local park or to the land.
On the rare occasion I do get to go somewhere else, I'm not the one paying for it. This year I went to a concert my brother got me tickets for, a sea safari that my mum paid for, the cinema that my mum paid for, the village carnival that I don't know if you have to pay for, and the beach and cinema when my brother was visiting. But even that is way more than I usually get to go anywhere.
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olderdude-xx
10 months ago
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I understand a bit now. I was rather introverted myself when I was younger. But I did get out and do things.
At age 12 I started shoveling snow and mowing lawns for money - and in fact purchased virtually all of my own cloths after that (I grew up in poverty - my parents did not have money for a lot of things - all of us kids learned to work for money somehow at about age 12 - 13).
My friendships were few. But I did have friends. I casually dated a few gals; but the fact is that I was virgin until age 27 when I found someone who was looking for more than just fun and sex, and who was not of the opinion that we could just try marriage and get a divorce if there were problems (there are problems in all long term relationships and marriages - I needed someone who agreed that we worked out problems and divorce was only the last option). Now I'm willing to do a "situational" relationship with the intent that its long term (with 2 stated exceptions related to personal sexual fantasies).
OK - it makes since. Here is my advice:
1) Using your birth certificate get a government ID. In the USA even the mentally incompetent and criminals in prison can get a government ID as long as they are over I believe age 16 in all States (Age 16 being when Drivers Licenses can be issued - and the Department of Motor Vehicles also issues ID cards for people who are not licensed to drive).
2) Tell your parents and other family members that you would like to learn to handle money (at least for minor things in life), and could you have a weekly or monthly "allowance." Tell them you would also like to learn how to buy groceries as well - and if they would fund you for grocery trips. Note that they are likely going to want to monitor how you are spending money and to assist you to learn things at least for a while.
As part of this you can set up a bank account and get most likely a Debit Card (which withdraws money from your bank account - and is not a credit card).
You will have to learn to save and budget as part of handling money.
Please keep me posted on your progress. I expect that you could get an ID card within a few days (or so).
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dude_Jones
10 months ago
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Tinybird
10 months ago
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Bro. Thanks for helping people.
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olderdude-xx
10 months ago
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It's what I do... I personally believe that my purpose on this earth is to assist other people. I learned long ago that giving money almost never produces any long term change (it might produce temporary relief). So I work on assisting people in other ways.
Well we tried to get me a bank account, but there was always some problem, we went to like 5 banks and there was always some problem so we couldn't do it.
--
olderdude-xx
10 months ago
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Keep trying - ask what the problem is, and work to fix it.
There are always a solution - if you keep trying.
The difference between a winner and a looser is that a winner keeps trying no matter how many losses they suffer. Loosing and learning lessons from loosing is the only way you become a consistent winner in any fair competition.
A looser is a looser only because they quit.
I believe that you can be a winner in life Tinybird. So keep trying, and always ask what the problem is and how can it be fixed. Some bank out there has a solution.
When my wife was visiting from Ukraine and we decided to get married I wanted her to open a bank account in her name. Most of the local banks were not set up to open a bank account using the information from a foreign passport and a temporary immigration document from the USA Immigration Service (I live in a fairly small community).
I had to find a national bank chain in the next city over that had branches in cities with universities that had lots of foreign students. Their internal forms were set up to be able to use a foreign passport and the temporary immigration document as identification documents to open an account. It just was not worth it for the smaller state and local banks and credit unions to set up for that possibility.