You don't understand I don't have any friends, I don't want to ask my parents for it, I don't have a job or any way to pay for things, I'm basically a child living in an adult's body, I don't know how to do any of that stuff.
Tinybird: I've been thinking about what you have said, and am confused.
I had the impression that you went shopping, went to movies, events, ate food when out of the house, and did many of the normal activities that other people do (and those activities require that you have some spending money)
Yet you seem to indicate in this conversation that you seem to be helpless and cannot do anything normal in life.
Can you please explain: Was my vision of you wrong?
Yes, I hardly go out of the house at all, except to the local park, or if my mum takes me somewhere, which is very rare. The only other place I ever get to go is my dad's land where we keep the horses and chickens.
So basically the only place I ever go is the local park or to the land.
On the rare occasion I do get to go somewhere else, I'm not the one paying for it. This year I went to a concert my brother got me tickets for, a sea safari that my mum paid for, the cinema that my mum paid for, the village carnival that I don't know if you have to pay for, and the beach and cinema when my brother was visiting. But even that is way more than I usually get to go anywhere.
I understand a bit now. I was rather introverted myself when I was younger. But I did get out and do things.
At age 12 I started shoveling snow and mowing lawns for money - and in fact purchased virtually all of my own cloths after that (I grew up in poverty - my parents did not have money for a lot of things - all of us kids learned to work for money somehow at about age 12 - 13).
My friendships were few. But I did have friends. I casually dated a few gals; but the fact is that I was virgin until age 27 when I found someone who was looking for more than just fun and sex, and who was not of the opinion that we could just try marriage and get a divorce if there were problems (there are problems in all long term relationships and marriages - I needed someone who agreed that we worked out problems and divorce was only the last option). Now I'm willing to do a "situational" relationship with the intent that its long term (with 2 stated exceptions related to personal sexual fantasies).
OK - it makes since. Here is my advice:
1) Using your birth certificate get a government ID. In the USA even the mentally incompetent and criminals in prison can get a government ID as long as they are over I believe age 16 in all States (Age 16 being when Drivers Licenses can be issued - and the Department of Motor Vehicles also issues ID cards for people who are not licensed to drive).
2) Tell your parents and other family members that you would like to learn to handle money (at least for minor things in life), and could you have a weekly or monthly "allowance." Tell them you would also like to learn how to buy groceries as well - and if they would fund you for grocery trips. Note that they are likely going to want to monitor how you are spending money and to assist you to learn things at least for a while.
As part of this you can set up a bank account and get most likely a Debit Card (which withdraws money from your bank account - and is not a credit card).
You will have to learn to save and budget as part of handling money.
Please keep me posted on your progress. I expect that you could get an ID card within a few days (or so).
It's what I do... I personally believe that my purpose on this earth is to assist other people. I learned long ago that giving money almost never produces any long term change (it might produce temporary relief). So I work on assisting people in other ways.
Well we tried to get me a bank account, but there was always some problem, we went to like 5 banks and there was always some problem so we couldn't do it.
Keep trying - ask what the problem is, and work to fix it.
There are always a solution - if you keep trying.
The difference between a winner and a looser is that a winner keeps trying no matter how many losses they suffer. Loosing and learning lessons from loosing is the only way you become a consistent winner in any fair competition.
A looser is a looser only because they quit.
I believe that you can be a winner in life Tinybird. So keep trying, and always ask what the problem is and how can it be fixed. Some bank out there has a solution.
When my wife was visiting from Ukraine and we decided to get married I wanted her to open a bank account in her name. Most of the local banks were not set up to open a bank account using the information from a foreign passport and a temporary immigration document from the USA Immigration Service (I live in a fairly small community).
I had to find a national bank chain in the next city over that had branches in cities with universities that had lots of foreign students. Their internal forms were set up to be able to use a foreign passport and the temporary immigration document as identification documents to open an account. It just was not worth it for the smaller state and local banks and credit unions to set up for that possibility.
The internet is a great place to learn about and how to do many things. I'm sure that you can find information and instructions on gift cards and store bought prepaid Credit and Debit cards. Where to buy them (in the USA any grocery store or pharmacy has all 3, and many hardware, sporting goods, and office supply stores as well).
You can message the admin of this site and ask what kinds of cards from the UK they accept.
There are many things you can do.
Here is one of the keys to how to become successful at anything. You need to understand that most failures in life want to do what is easy and pleasing to them. There are lots of things that fall into that catagory; but, they do not lead to success.
Those that are successful learn that its necessary to do things that they don't want to do - as its the only way they can be successful at whatever it is they are trying to be successful at.
Now that's just one of the key parts of success... there are others.
I'm here and willing to become a cyber friend and try to assist you (and I believe that I can assist you)... but, it's up to you to do what's necessary to be able to contact me in a more private mode. You may have to learn some things you don't know (but can learn). You may ask to ask others for assistance, and other things. It's even likely that you will botch your 1st few attempts at new things (which is normal: learn and move on).
I believe that you can fulfill your dreams of meeting a decent guy, getting that kiss and perhaps a lot more later. That you can learn to become a productive and valuable person in society, and impact the world. If you are willing to do what it takes to move forward. Unfortunately, there are far too many in the world (in my opinion) who don't want to put fourth the effort or eat their pride and admit they don't know something or need other forms of assistance.
No one makes it on their own... We all depend on others to get ahead in life.
I do hope to hear from you via a Gold member message to me. If not tomorrow - then someday.
I'll be around as long as my health allows that - which hopefully is another several decades.
I am a 25 year old female who has never kissed
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You don't understand I don't have any friends, I don't want to ask my parents for it, I don't have a job or any way to pay for things, I'm basically a child living in an adult's body, I don't know how to do any of that stuff.
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olderdude-xx
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olderdude-xx
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Tinybird: I've been thinking about what you have said, and am confused.
I had the impression that you went shopping, went to movies, events, ate food when out of the house, and did many of the normal activities that other people do (and those activities require that you have some spending money)
Yet you seem to indicate in this conversation that you seem to be helpless and cannot do anything normal in life.
Can you please explain: Was my vision of you wrong?
--
Tinybird
10 months ago
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Yes, I hardly go out of the house at all, except to the local park, or if my mum takes me somewhere, which is very rare. The only other place I ever get to go is my dad's land where we keep the horses and chickens.
So basically the only place I ever go is the local park or to the land.
On the rare occasion I do get to go somewhere else, I'm not the one paying for it. This year I went to a concert my brother got me tickets for, a sea safari that my mum paid for, the cinema that my mum paid for, the village carnival that I don't know if you have to pay for, and the beach and cinema when my brother was visiting. But even that is way more than I usually get to go anywhere.
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olderdude-xx
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I understand a bit now. I was rather introverted myself when I was younger. But I did get out and do things.
At age 12 I started shoveling snow and mowing lawns for money - and in fact purchased virtually all of my own cloths after that (I grew up in poverty - my parents did not have money for a lot of things - all of us kids learned to work for money somehow at about age 12 - 13).
My friendships were few. But I did have friends. I casually dated a few gals; but the fact is that I was virgin until age 27 when I found someone who was looking for more than just fun and sex, and who was not of the opinion that we could just try marriage and get a divorce if there were problems (there are problems in all long term relationships and marriages - I needed someone who agreed that we worked out problems and divorce was only the last option). Now I'm willing to do a "situational" relationship with the intent that its long term (with 2 stated exceptions related to personal sexual fantasies).
OK - it makes since. Here is my advice:
1) Using your birth certificate get a government ID. In the USA even the mentally incompetent and criminals in prison can get a government ID as long as they are over I believe age 16 in all States (Age 16 being when Drivers Licenses can be issued - and the Department of Motor Vehicles also issues ID cards for people who are not licensed to drive).
2) Tell your parents and other family members that you would like to learn to handle money (at least for minor things in life), and could you have a weekly or monthly "allowance." Tell them you would also like to learn how to buy groceries as well - and if they would fund you for grocery trips. Note that they are likely going to want to monitor how you are spending money and to assist you to learn things at least for a while.
As part of this you can set up a bank account and get most likely a Debit Card (which withdraws money from your bank account - and is not a credit card).
You will have to learn to save and budget as part of handling money.
Please keep me posted on your progress. I expect that you could get an ID card within a few days (or so).
--
dude_Jones
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Bro. Thanks for helping people.
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olderdude-xx
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It's what I do... I personally believe that my purpose on this earth is to assist other people. I learned long ago that giving money almost never produces any long term change (it might produce temporary relief). So I work on assisting people in other ways.
Well we tried to get me a bank account, but there was always some problem, we went to like 5 banks and there was always some problem so we couldn't do it.
--
olderdude-xx
10 months ago
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Keep trying - ask what the problem is, and work to fix it.
There are always a solution - if you keep trying.
The difference between a winner and a looser is that a winner keeps trying no matter how many losses they suffer. Loosing and learning lessons from loosing is the only way you become a consistent winner in any fair competition.
A looser is a looser only because they quit.
I believe that you can be a winner in life Tinybird. So keep trying, and always ask what the problem is and how can it be fixed. Some bank out there has a solution.
When my wife was visiting from Ukraine and we decided to get married I wanted her to open a bank account in her name. Most of the local banks were not set up to open a bank account using the information from a foreign passport and a temporary immigration document from the USA Immigration Service (I live in a fairly small community).
I had to find a national bank chain in the next city over that had branches in cities with universities that had lots of foreign students. Their internal forms were set up to be able to use a foreign passport and the temporary immigration document as identification documents to open an account. It just was not worth it for the smaller state and local banks and credit unions to set up for that possibility.
The internet is a great place to learn about and how to do many things. I'm sure that you can find information and instructions on gift cards and store bought prepaid Credit and Debit cards. Where to buy them (in the USA any grocery store or pharmacy has all 3, and many hardware, sporting goods, and office supply stores as well).
You can message the admin of this site and ask what kinds of cards from the UK they accept.
There are many things you can do.
Here is one of the keys to how to become successful at anything. You need to understand that most failures in life want to do what is easy and pleasing to them. There are lots of things that fall into that catagory; but, they do not lead to success.
Those that are successful learn that its necessary to do things that they don't want to do - as its the only way they can be successful at whatever it is they are trying to be successful at.
Now that's just one of the key parts of success... there are others.
I'm here and willing to become a cyber friend and try to assist you (and I believe that I can assist you)... but, it's up to you to do what's necessary to be able to contact me in a more private mode. You may have to learn some things you don't know (but can learn). You may ask to ask others for assistance, and other things. It's even likely that you will botch your 1st few attempts at new things (which is normal: learn and move on).
I believe that you can fulfill your dreams of meeting a decent guy, getting that kiss and perhaps a lot more later. That you can learn to become a productive and valuable person in society, and impact the world. If you are willing to do what it takes to move forward. Unfortunately, there are far too many in the world (in my opinion) who don't want to put fourth the effort or eat their pride and admit they don't know something or need other forms of assistance.
No one makes it on their own... We all depend on others to get ahead in life.
I do hope to hear from you via a Gold member message to me. If not tomorrow - then someday.
I'll be around as long as my health allows that - which hopefully is another several decades.