How to get over a toxic family relationship

I've been to countless counseling sessions and at this point I feel that we're a bit stuck on how I am to deal with a toxic parental. So i figured I'd come here and ask for advice.

For some perspective, I'm 19 and my mum has still tried having a lot of say and control over what I do, and who I want to be with. Since she hadn't got her way with that, she had decided to disown of me. I feel like I'm currently going through a grieving process, but I am only thinking of the good things when I'm upset and not the bad, and there was a lot of bad things she'd done, not only by trying to manipulate and control me but trying to get me to become more subservient to her, almost.

I'm looking for advice on how am I, or anyone else that may be going through something similar, can overcome this obstacle that is having to deal with either being disowned by a parent or having to preserve with a toxic parental in general?

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Comments ( 7 )
  • MrToxic

    It's important to remind yourself of the negative things they've done. Especially when you find yourself thinking positively on the matter. You could ask your friends for support by speaking to them about your past experiences and the bad things your mother did. What's vital is that you don't allow her back into your life. Toxic people will always have a certain degree of toxicity until they can fully admit openly all their misdeeds. If you consider letting her back in then ask yourself, "Can I trust her without a shadow of a doubt?".

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  • Nikclaire

    I had an abusive family and I walked away from them. I treated it like a death.

    Your situation may just need some separation tho. Time apart for you to grow and establish your life. Then you can begin an adult relationship with them on your terms.

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  • Mammal-lover

    Stop going to therapists you are just wasting money. Walk away. It's simple really

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    • Nikclaire

      Therapy isn't a waste if you want to actively work on improving your life and understand what it is. It's not them "fixing" you, it's them helping to facilitate fixing yourself.

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      • Counseling is different from therapy counseling in my country is free unless if you want to make a donation and they may not work out for everyone's situation but I still feel good with donating because it's good to vent sometimes-o.p

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      • Mammal-lover

        I guess theres some use for certain people. My mom tried to get me to go therapy all my life. Never liked the idea. I just dont like therapy personally. It just seems like a huge waste sane with chiropractors

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  • GaelicPotato

    Ghost them tbh.

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