How much freedom should my boyfriend give me?

7 Comments

so what should i do to stay in a relationship but let them know i want to keep all of my freedom. i want to be able to do everything i want to do,but also should respect what the do/dont prefer me to do. right? like if he doesnt want me to party ill have a hard time deciding if its my decision or if i should respect his opinion and not party so much. (thats just an example) is it his place to say what he would/wouldnt like to see me doing or is he trying to change me?? or does he just care?? please respond.

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Comments ( 7 )
  • aaaa1234
    6 years ago

    The purpose of a relationship is to have a companion to share joys and sorrows with, and to enjoy consensual sex with. Your boyfriend is not your master, he has no right to "give" or "take" freedom from you. Please get out of that suffocating relationship, it is destroying your life.

    YOLO. All the best!

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    • Ellenna
      6 years ago

      Great response!

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  • CreamPuffs
    6 years ago

    He isn't your leader, but I'd suggest making an effort to do as he requests as long as the requests are reasonable. Not out of obedience but out of respect for how he feels. He has no authority to tell you what to do.

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  • Ellenna
    6 years ago

    He can express is wishes about your behavior away from him, but if he hassles you about it in any way you and he are incompatible because you want your freedom and he can't accept that.

    It's not about how much freedom he allows you: your freedom is yours and not his to grant or refuse to grant you.

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  • Jimbo24
    6 years ago

    I am of the opinion that a relationship works better when someone clearly wears the pants. If your boyfriend is a capable dude, has some assertiveness and decisiveness in him, knows about the world and how to navigate it, and/or is older than you are, it's best to let him be the leader of your relationship. And as the one in charge, he should have a say in how much you can party, if at all, and who do you hang with and where. But that's only if he proves himself more knowledgeable about the world and more capable than you are. If so, it's best that you do as he says.

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    • CreamPuffs
      6 years ago

      You seem pretty chauvinistic to be honest.

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      • Jimbo24
        6 years ago

        Oh yeah? Sounds like a pretty fair deal to me. One party gets more responsibilities while the other gets the security of having serious things taken care of, and in exchange the responsible party gets more authority and the one under his charge submits to that authority. The fact that I suggest it's the man who should wear the pants is simply because men tend to be more fit to lead.

        But if the guy isn't then he shouldn't take charge or be the boss. I don't believe the man should have automatic authority in a relationship until he proves himself capable of handling things and leading. Nothing chauvinistic about that.

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