How many chickens would it take to defeat an elephant?

My coworker texted me this question and the question just seems so absurd. I figured I'd ask it here to see what you lovely people would say.

Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!
[ Report Post ]
Comments ( 29 ) Sort: best | oldest
  • they could just send a suicide chicken to fly down the elephants throat and choke it with a tracheal poultry & feather bolus

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • A chicken's beak and claws aren't strong enough to penetrate elephant skin, but I can think of one way for a highly motivated and well-trained kamikaze chicken to kill an elephant:

    If the chicken disguised itself as such a tasty piece of foliage that the elephant picked it up and put it in its mouth, the chicken could claw it's way down the elephant's throat and jam itself in the elephant's windpipe.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • I feel like at a certain point the elephant wouldn't be able to handle infinite chickens attacking them at once, but chickens are kinda stupid and probably wouldnt all be able to coordinate working together.

      Maybe ants would be better cause theyd all swarm together, but youd need way more ants than chickens.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
        -
      • Side question then. How many ants does it take to defeat a chicken. It probably happened at some point. So what a full colony? Or a full allied assault against the clucking menace?

        Comment Hidden ( show )
      • Chickens aren't stupid. I thought this too, until I got my own flock. I hugely underestimated them. Don't make the same mistake that I did.

        Comment Hidden ( show )
          -
        • So will chickens work together to fight off a bigger animal? I dont know what kind of pack mentality they have

          Comment Hidden ( show )
            -
          • It depends on the animal. A dog, for example, will be able to kill chickens pretty easily even if they are in a flock because they are quick and have that bad ass bite. If a dog runs into a flock of chickens the chickens will usually just scatter and panic, and one of them ends up getting eaten.

            But with some stuff they definitely will gang up. They have a pecking order (this is where the term originates from) and if they sense weakness then the head chicken will start to peck, and all of the others follow suit. Basically they just follow the leader into any situation, dangerous or otherwise. Their pecks are nastier than you would think - if you introduce a new chicken or rooster into a flock and the leader decides that they don't like the newbie, the newbie gets pecked to death if you don't intervene quick enough.

            They also are very attracted to bleeding wounds. So if something already has a cut, the chickens will zone in on it and peck the crap out of the wound until they hit bone, and then they will start on other areas.

            They are also very smart and recognise patterns in human behaviour - they know who feeds then, they can tell if someone doesn't like them, and they know a soft touch - my chickens have pecked a bleeding cut into my toes before. They wouldn't do that to my husband.

            They can escape from almost any enclosure in pretty ingenious ways.

            There's a reason they made that film "Chicken Run". Chickens are organised and are usually up to something.

            Edit: I've realised that I've painted the chickens in a bad light. They're great, I highly recommend them as pets. All I'm saying is, don't underestimate them.

            Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Only one. Get a chicken, expose it to deadly radiation levels, essentially turning it into a nuclear weapon and chuck it at the elephant.

    Hell, with one nuclear chicken you could probably give a whole town radiation sickness XD

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • I read “eggplant”.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • Then one chicken would suffice. Two if you wanted to have the eggplant suffer the least.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
  • 100

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • Teach the chickens to command mice to do their bidding.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • are we talking free range chicken or da delicious ones?

    Comment Hidden ( show )
      -
    • Any one will suffice in this scenario.

      Comment Hidden ( show )
        -
      • Not really. Free range is at least a walking chicken. A juicy chicken barely has the bone density to not die laying down.

        God I love generic engineering!

        Comment Hidden ( show )
      • yo ass obviously don't know chickens then

        Comment Hidden ( show )
  • One. A Human with a Gun.

    Logical reason? The cunt is a coward.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • 50 thousand

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • They’d just die wave after wave, only so many can fit in a space at once.

    So no amount would I suppose

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • There are lots of elephants here and they are good swimmers. Have they ever crossed a chicken with a duck?

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • 637

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • How many chickens would it take to distract the elephant from eating or drinking? No amount of chickens are going to win a straight up fight. But if the chickens play it smart (which the wouldnt) they could eventually kill the elephant from dehydration. So I would say around 5k free range chickens and the elephant was by itself.

    Comment Hidden ( show )
  • I suppose however many it took for the elephant to fall over from exhaustion. They wouldn't even be able to noticeably pinch its skin. It'd be a an absolute massacre... And finger lickin' good!

    Comment Hidden ( show )
Add A Comment