How do i make rockstar taste good at all?

I bought a Rockstar (energy drink) for the first time today, and now I see why I only saw people on probation or in some sort of drug addiction drinking these in school. You'd have to be out of your mind high, dying of thirst, or have no taste buds in order to enjoy one of these putrid sodas. Not quite as despicable as Red Bull, but it's up there.

Allow me to describe the flavor of a Rockstar to those of you who have never drank one before:

A half second after sipping, your mouth is flooded with the potent flavor of children's mouthwash. As the sickening taste of an ACT Kids Bubble Gum-esque hits you and makes you feel sick, the aroma soon follows. After forcing it down your throat, the aftertaste is EXACTLY the same flavor of the aforementioned mouthwash.

What can I put in this to make it taste less like shit? I'd return it to the store, but despite selling it, I don't think they'll want it back (even if I didn't open it). I can't pour alcohol into it to make it taste better in contrast, and I don't like to waste drinks.

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Comments ( 21 )
  • curious-bunny

    Just don't drink it. I used to drink that stuff, stopped for awhile then had one again and it was like drinking throw up. No thank you.

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  • donteatstuffoffthesidewalk

    yall couldnt pay me to drink that shit

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  • My ass hurts so bad, I feel like I have been raped by satans pitch fork

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    • Doesnormalmatter

      Just removed a butt plug? I know that feeling hehe.

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    • CozmoWank

      I hate when that happens.

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  • Doesnormalmatter

    Why drink it at all? If its energy you want, just buy some caffeine tabs online.

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    • Grunewald

      I had a bad time with those too. Ended up consuming so much caffeine it gave me palpitations and made me drowsy. Can't recommend...

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      • Doesnormalmatter

        Well I recommend. Everyone is different and I take 3 a day so...

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  • CozmoWank

    Try mixing it with shampoo.

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    • Cuntsiclestick

      Oh silly me! I got the diet shampoo!

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      • CozmoWank

        Diet shampoo lacks body.

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      • mauzi

        Bubble buddy likes bendy straws.....

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        • Cuntsiclestick

          *bends the straw in anger*

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  • jethro

    I think you have to lick the butthole of a skunk first to make any of those drinks drinkable.

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  • dimwitted

    Put the drink down and walk away??????

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  • bbrown95

    Why drink it if you don't like it? Even if you hate to waste it, there's no point in drinking it anyway if you don't like it. How much did you buy?

    If it's unopened, is there any way maybe a food pantry or something would take it (assuming they accept energy drinks)? Do you have any friends you could give it to? Maybe take it to work, leave it in the break room, and put a sign saying "FREE" on it?

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  • Pinch your nose shut and drink it. You won't taste it at all.

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  • canihaveuhh

    just pour a bunch of better soda in it to mask the taste

    ...or y’know, don’t buy it in the first place

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  • Cuntsiclestick

    The only way to make it taste good is to add more sugar and water, but I don't recommend it. XD

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  • Grunewald

    I really liked the taste of it, actually. Energy drinks did too much crazy stuff to my heart though (and the energy crash later was NO picnic) so now I just stick to coffee.

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    • You an ex-convict? lol

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