how can i bang my mom without getting in trouble

Okay, here's what you do. Go into the kitchen and take out your member. You know the drawer, the one that's fraught with kitchen knives and skewers? That's the one. Well, open it slightly, and I know that can be a chore, because sometimes it gets jammed, but stay with me on this one. Slide your penis, erect or flaccid it makes no difference, into that drawer, and SLAM THE DRAWER AS HARD AS YOU CAN! I hope that helps.