Yea he hardly ever wants to share with me unless he's really upset about something and I don't why it is so, he says he does but he doesn't. For example you ask him how his day was and he's just like it was ok, he doesn't get descriptive hardly ever let alone on something like this, and yea I'm definitly worried about him stonewalling me. He knows I'm a worrier and that I over think things so I guess till he feels he's gonna share that information with me he just isn't gonna get any, I'll probably use the same line on him. Cause yea that's not ok, yea he doesn't want me to take the initiative it seems, he's only ever interested on being on top two and it's like what the fudge!? I don't understand it, I love him I do but I don't think me and him will last, if for any other reason than him not giving enough info on anything. Granted we have been together for almoist 6 months
Only sketchy information, but my most charitable interpretation is that he's a young guy who's bought into the whole strong, silent man mythology, who isn't very in-touch with his emotional side, and who is possibly insecure about sex, maybe because he doesn't know much about it - because, hey, it's all supposed to come naturally if you're one of those strong, silent men, right?
Alternatively, he could be a controlling dickhead who wants to control the information you have about him, who wants to control you during sex and who - since he knows you worry - deliberately uses uncertainty to push your buttons (which is obviously another aspect of control).
For what it's worth, it wasn't until I'd been through one marriage and was nearly 30 that I finally understood that guys didn't have to be like the emotionally repressed father I learned how to be a guy from. Maybe he's not a hopeless case and he just needs to learn and grow up, or maybe he's a controlling asshole with psychopathic tendencies. You have a far better idea than anyone here.
The top one sounds pretty accurate only he's 40, I'm the young one in this relastionship, I'm 20 with no experience in any of this and he has been in many relastionships including a semi abusive wife, at least there divorce was abusive she litterally attacked him. He could be insecure maybe, I know he worries that i think about other men or something since he's a chubbier guy and well his appearance had to grow on me I wasn't attracted to him right away, I've told him countless times that as my feelings grew for him so did my attraction for him, anyways he feels I'm out of his league being tall and skinny and what not. It's ludicrous if you ask me, that's true maybe he's trying to push my buttons. Either way he has he knows I'm a vindictive grudge holding bitch and this would be the first hopefully last time he opens that side of me. I'm stubborn as a dead mule haha. Na I think he just needs to mature and grow up and learn to be more open with me, if he can't I fear and believe we will not last. Honesty trust and loyalty are what I cherish abobe everything and openness is right there next in line so with him being so shut in well it stings you know?
he said I can only get in his pants when he tells me 2
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Yea he hardly ever wants to share with me unless he's really upset about something and I don't why it is so, he says he does but he doesn't. For example you ask him how his day was and he's just like it was ok, he doesn't get descriptive hardly ever let alone on something like this, and yea I'm definitly worried about him stonewalling me. He knows I'm a worrier and that I over think things so I guess till he feels he's gonna share that information with me he just isn't gonna get any, I'll probably use the same line on him. Cause yea that's not ok, yea he doesn't want me to take the initiative it seems, he's only ever interested on being on top two and it's like what the fudge!? I don't understand it, I love him I do but I don't think me and him will last, if for any other reason than him not giving enough info on anything. Granted we have been together for almoist 6 months
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Boojum
5 years ago
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Only sketchy information, but my most charitable interpretation is that he's a young guy who's bought into the whole strong, silent man mythology, who isn't very in-touch with his emotional side, and who is possibly insecure about sex, maybe because he doesn't know much about it - because, hey, it's all supposed to come naturally if you're one of those strong, silent men, right?
Alternatively, he could be a controlling dickhead who wants to control the information you have about him, who wants to control you during sex and who - since he knows you worry - deliberately uses uncertainty to push your buttons (which is obviously another aspect of control).
For what it's worth, it wasn't until I'd been through one marriage and was nearly 30 that I finally understood that guys didn't have to be like the emotionally repressed father I learned how to be a guy from. Maybe he's not a hopeless case and he just needs to learn and grow up, or maybe he's a controlling asshole with psychopathic tendencies. You have a far better idea than anyone here.
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curious-bunny
5 years ago
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The top one sounds pretty accurate only he's 40, I'm the young one in this relastionship, I'm 20 with no experience in any of this and he has been in many relastionships including a semi abusive wife, at least there divorce was abusive she litterally attacked him. He could be insecure maybe, I know he worries that i think about other men or something since he's a chubbier guy and well his appearance had to grow on me I wasn't attracted to him right away, I've told him countless times that as my feelings grew for him so did my attraction for him, anyways he feels I'm out of his league being tall and skinny and what not. It's ludicrous if you ask me, that's true maybe he's trying to push my buttons. Either way he has he knows I'm a vindictive grudge holding bitch and this would be the first hopefully last time he opens that side of me. I'm stubborn as a dead mule haha. Na I think he just needs to mature and grow up and learn to be more open with me, if he can't I fear and believe we will not last. Honesty trust and loyalty are what I cherish abobe everything and openness is right there next in line so with him being so shut in well it stings you know?