He died and i didnt feel anything

so my grandad was a pretty nice fellow, i dont remember too much but i know i visited him alot and talked to him alot,

when he died i felt nothing at all and i dont know why, i did like him he was nice but i just dont feel anything about his death, my mother told me that (you just dont feel it now, in a few weeks it will hit and you will feel it" but i never did,

i do feel sad and stuff i aint a phycho, but why does even the thought of my cat dying bring me much more despair than my grandads death ever brought me (which was nothing still)

help i dont know how to feel about this.

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Comments ( 12 )
  • Billy247newaccount_35467829

    Don't worry, that's normal.

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  • jodi1955

    the closeness of the relationship makes all the difference with someone dies, I felt almost nothing when my parents died, yet was quite upset with a friend died. reason is the relationship.

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  • Mark92

    You said "i do feel sad and stuff ", so you did feel something and did indeed care. You just were not excessively emotional about it, which is perfectly normal. They say the quitter ones take it the harder way.

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  • Tommythecaty

    You just weren’t close.

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  • harkosv

    How close were you with your grandfather? One of my grandmothers passed away in the last 5 years. She was a kind, sweet, very loving woman, but I only got to see her a few times a year so we never really formed a strong bond. I attended her funeral but I'm kind of with you in that I had a harder time mourning a pet of mine that had died, simply because I interacted with that pet every day and had a really strong bond with her

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  • Kowhaifan

    well i mena if my grandma died i would be pretty sad and hungover about it

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  • kelili

    I felt the same when my grandmother died. We were not close but she was someone I saw everyday because she lived in the house next to our's. I was even feeling a little bit relieved as she was blind, very dependent and a little delusional the years preceding her death.
    And I think that it's less painful or not at all painful when they die old.
    My father passed away recently and I was shattered. When I asked my son if he was sad he answered no. I was not even shocked because I know this lack of feeling.

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  • olderdude-xx

    I did not feel a loss either when my grandparents died, nor an assortment of other relatives.

    Close family and friends where the ones I felt the most.

    I also felt for the employee who died that was under my supervision. I cannot recall why he died as it occurred over 30 years ago. It was not work related.

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  • bbrown95

    I'm assuming you weren't extremely close to your grandfather, or at least didn't see him on the same basis you saw your cat, which is probably why you felt the way you did.

    I've noticed that with relatives I didn't see as often, their deaths feel more like they just aren't where I am presently, but we will run into each other at a family reunion or something. It doesn't feel like they're really dead, even if I know they are. Same with family members that were away a lot; it felt like they were away at work or on a trip, and not dead. However, when someone (including a pet) passes who lived with you, their absence is much more noticeable and heart wrenching. When my cat died, I just felt like all I wanted to do was scoop him up in my arms and hold him, and the pain of knowing that wasn't possible was awful.

    We all process certain deaths differently, and that is okay and to be expected.

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    • Kowhaifan

      well i mean........ you can still scoop your cat up.........

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  • 1WeirdGuy

    Depends on alot of factors. Normally I get really upset if an animal dies or someone I know. But when my cat died at 20 years old I felt she had a long life and was ready to go. It didnt seem like it was a tragedy. When someone dies from an overdose or something its harder.

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  • libertybell

    Sounds like you weren't that close.

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