Have you ever regretted letting someone go?

So, i briefly dated this lad it was amazing we went on 9 dates and he was the boyversion of me, I’ve only just started this dating thing and I’m a virgin it got to 9 dates and I was starting to get comfortable with touching. He’d never touched me only put his arm round etc. I was worried I wasn’t being affectionate enough and then he finished with me saying I’m great, and if it was a different time in his life he would snatch me up, but he wasn’t ready for a relationship. I kinda tried to plea with him and then he stopped replying. It’s been 2 weeks. Yesterday I went out with someone else. A first date and he started touching me I said no and he wanted to kiss and wanted me to go back to his and because I’ve never done this I was like is this normal? All I wanted was James (the first guy) who never tried anything on. I’m really shy tho. Anyway I got home and this creep kissed me I felt sick...

All I want is james I don’t know what to do. Was I not affectionate enough? All I want to do is message him... he seems fine without me while I’m sat here hurting. I can’t let it go. But what would I say? What if James never liked me? But he was fine on our last date then 2 days later he says he isn’t ready.