I had the stomach flu. I was 18 or so. My girlfriend was one of those very needy and super high maintenance girlfriends (she was fucking adorable, so . . . worth it?). She lived down the street from me. About an eight minute walk-- I'm sure you can see where this is going. She was watching a scary movie and NEEDED me to comfort her. She had a way of making you feel guilty, causing you to do what she wants without overtly asking--I'm glad that's over. So, on my walk-- I had to walk because running weakens my ability to hermetically seal my anus with my glutes-- my seal sprung a leak which compromised hull integrity. Eventually, butt clenching failed and my innards were evacuated all along my butt, legs, and sidewalk. It happened again right before reaching her home.
Have you ever pooped your pants as an adult... be honest.
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yes, twice, within five minutes each other.
I had the stomach flu. I was 18 or so. My girlfriend was one of those very needy and super high maintenance girlfriends (she was fucking adorable, so . . . worth it?). She lived down the street from me. About an eight minute walk-- I'm sure you can see where this is going. She was watching a scary movie and NEEDED me to comfort her. She had a way of making you feel guilty, causing you to do what she wants without overtly asking--I'm glad that's over. So, on my walk-- I had to walk because running weakens my ability to hermetically seal my anus with my glutes-- my seal sprung a leak which compromised hull integrity. Eventually, butt clenching failed and my innards were evacuated all along my butt, legs, and sidewalk. It happened again right before reaching her home.
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8 years ago
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I'm so sorry to hear it. I hope you were able to get home okay to clean up before seeing her. Thanks for sharing. I've been there. It's horrible.