Friend who always asks for rides, how do you feel?

Wondering how people feel about that friend who always, always asks for rides.

They can’t help it 1
It drives me crazy 2
I don’t mind 2
Occasionally, but not EVERYTIME 8
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Comments ( 21 )
  • Mehereok1

    I've stopped doing it. People take full advantage and don't care about your plans, schedule, or being on time for pick up or drop off. Too often, their thinking is "He's coming, he'll wait", or "I can't help it, I'm late". And forget about gas money. If you're giving someone a ride, may as well toss that idea out the window, b/c it's not going to happen.

    Also know someone who now has a stalker problem, and it started by..Her cheesing rides from him for weeks. Much as the guy is a creeper and stalker, my view is...You kept asking for rides, kept spending time with him in the car, don't be surprised when he thinks you're interested. Did this to yourself.

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    • I’m starting to feel this way. I have a sibling who is 30, married, and doesn’t have their liscense.

      I’ve gotten irritated when she asks for rides, and my family thinks I’m evil for wanting to say no.

      She makes more money than me, and granted I can do small things like take her grocery shopping occasionally, it starts to add up and get annoying. (Edit note: I don’t think I was as objective. It’s not everyday or every week; her husband, obviously, drives her around the most.)

      Since she lives nearby, I’m somewhat forced to pick her up when from work when her husband has to stay over. I once got angry and told her she’s not my responsibility, which was wrong, but am I so wrong to get annoyed? I just felt like I was getting taken advantage of.

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      • Mehereok1

        That really is it, the feeling taken advantage of. Once or twice, fine, be nice and give rides. After that, some official arrangement needs to be done. I need x amount of gas money, if you're not on time, I'm leaving, etc. Set your ground rules.

        I was nice and took a friend to her job, 25 miles from my house, early morning. Even then I felt..I don't want to do this, but said I would, and it's only once. Dropped her off, and she asked me to pick her up, too. Again, I figured, it's a pain, but, one and done. I get her, and she starts talking about "the rest of the month", and "once I get my income tax check, I'll have a car"..True story, btw..I took her home and put it to her nicely, but directly..I am not your taxi and today was it for my driving her. Sorry, but I have my business and life, too, and not blowing an hour and half, and 50 plus miles every day until you get your IRS check for a car.

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        • Your response is much appreciated!

          I do feel like at times I can be a jerk, and likely am, but my boundaries never seem to be respected.

          My sister has avoided getting her liscense after hitting a dog. She was scared (the dog survived,) so I understand why she hasn’t tried, yet it’s frustrating.

          If I say no, she nags until I say yes. I get irritated with her behavior, she then cries to my mom (our we adults?) and then I feel like a dick.

          She lives nearby, and sometimes on my days off, or if she goes away for the weekend, I do other choirs for her, like watch her house. I just feel like she is so needy for an adult. And granted, she and my brother-on-law treat me well, but it can get overwhelming. She truly treats me well otherwise. But I hate being made the bad guy just because I say I can’t do this every time.

          Not to mention I have another friend who always asks for rides :)

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          • Mehereok1

            She relies on you way too much. If she's married, why is he not pulling his fair share, or encouraging her to get her license? I wasn't "after" or interested in the female friend I gave rides to, but, she also often mentioned her boyfriend, he's so great, etc..And I thought..Well, why doesn't HE take your ass around instead of me?

            Giving rides is as bad as giving money, which I've also done too much. One of my female friends, very nice, has a job, but got herself into legal trouble, needed money for court..Fine, I gave her the amount I could afford to burn without it really effecting me. Then, she kept asking for more, like this was a negotiation..I told her just that..This isn't a negotiation, and be happy with what I'm giving..Giving you. That was also once and done as far as giving her any more cash. If someone offers x amount, and you try to cheese more, just shut up and take what they're nice enough to give you.

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            • The “I want to be spoiled” type of women are the worse. I’d chose death, lepersy, over being around them.

              Oh, and how she’s so concerned for his personal space, but fuck mine! She has to specify when I can visit, but I’m supposed to drop everything for her! She was the spolied first-born, so she doesn’t understand “no.”

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  • This is why Uber was invented.

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  • lordofopinions

    She's using you as a free taxi. Start making excuses once in a while then more and more to only giving her rides in emergencies. If you lose her as a friend there is not much lost.

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  • Kalo

    I don't have a person who asked for rides all the time. but I have a really close friend who will ask me to pick him up. drop him off, but it is because we are doing things together, he is only 16. and very thankful when I do, so I don't mind, I kind of like it actually.

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  • megadriver

    I don't mind giving a friend the occasional drive, especially if I'm going the same way. I love driving, so a passenger is welcome. This also gives me an opportunity to preach how great Mercedes is to my passenger(s)

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  • RoseIsabella

    It depends.

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  • redrainbow22

    Just stop handing out rides if your feeling stressed about it.

    It's selfish to cause someone stress because you want this and that, and that and that.

    Of course its always up to you, if you want to be nice about it and do it, then of course!

    But if your starting to feel stressed and taken advantage of, then just stop handing out the free travel.

    The other person cannot be so spoiled to expect to get what they want everytime.

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    • Being nice is getting old.

      Sometimes I wonder if my older sibling is even an adult. I just wish my family didn’t spoil her so I could say no without looking like I’m being selfish.

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      • redrainbow22

        Or you could say that your sister cant always get what she wants.

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  • nikkiclaire

    Depends why they need one.

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  • shuggy-chan

    Wait, what are friends?

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  • e51pegasi

    Money for fuel or they aren't going anywhere in the car. That is the least thay can offer.

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  • Fmlsince1992

    I’m irritated by people who always ask for rides, and one occasionally forgets their wallets as well.

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    • redrainbow22

      "forgets"

      XD

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      • Fmlsince1992

        He probably owes me $500, and thousands of miles in drives.

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        • redrainbow22

          Stop giving out rides then.

          I think it past it's due point

          Unless it's your dying grandpa who needs help or something. Thats a different situation

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