For my mother to resent me

5 Comments

My mom and my older sister have always been pretty close and will take one another's sides when one is in an argument with me. My sister won't have anything to do with me (she's nice to my face) but talks bad about me to her children, husband, friends and our mother. I wrote her a two page letter asking what I've done to her that was so bad and she never responded or said anything about the letter. On Facebook, listed as her family, are one of her friends brothers who she's known all her life but really isn't that close to him. And our step-sister (as her sister) and they live states apart and aren't close at all. I have asked my mom why Mel won't have anything to do with me and she just says "that's between you and your sister to work out. Well I made the move and wrote the letter so I'm stumped at what I'm supposed to do next. My mother and I are also estranged. She tells me how to parent my child, she won't ever do anything just to be nice, I have to pay her back somehow. I took care of her everyday when she had her knee replacement. I made sure that she did her exercises, put the ice on her knee when it was time, etc. I barely left her side so she was never alone and my sister cleaned up her room once. My mother even offered to send my daughter and I to Disneyland all expenses paid and we never heard about it again. I'm so upset that no matter what I do, it's never enough for my mom. My therapist told me "Just because they're family doesn't mean they're positive for you to be around". But it eats me up inside and breaks my heart. My sister will call me and ask if my daughter can go swimming over there and a lot of times my mother will call my daughter (who's 10) and invite her somewhere without even asking me. I've had it with the both of them and the extended family on my side who think I'm always the one at fault when there's an argument. I'm deeply depressed and I feel very alone. I have a wonderful little girl but it still tears me up inside that my family members are such assholes. Some advice please?

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Comments ( 5 )
  • S12207
    6 years ago

    I agree. I'm sure that awful to deal with but you are better off distancing yourself, they sound like they have alot of issues with their self esteem and narcissists I agree. People tend to project how they feel about themselves onto others. Bullys have the worst self esteem it's been proven. No matter what you do they will continue to treat you like shit until they do some inner work. Focus on you and your happiness and def keep your distance.

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    • turdferguson73
      6 years ago

      Thank you. That makes a lot of sense.

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  • AntiArchon
    6 years ago

    sounds like a bunch of narcissists. If you really reached out and tried to connect with them to no avail and are really self aware and sure you didn't do anything to deserve their treatment then dont bother.. just cut them off and rewire your brain not to need their love and approval.. you'll be happier, you got your daughter anywayz

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    • turdferguson73
      6 years ago

      Thank you, that makes me feel better.

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  • tozergrate
    6 years ago

    If a relationship is crap, family or not, then move away from it in favour of people who give a shit.

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