Dudes, how do you normally deal with morning wood?

26 Comments

Let's just say I'm trying to masturbate less often...

Wait for it to fade 30
Fap, sex 40
Cold shower 4
It just goes away soon enough to not care 37
Something different 17
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Comments ( 26 )
  • SUCKMEOFFMOFO
    7 years ago

    A 30 second hand job or blow job will cure it.

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    • kupokupo
      7 years ago | pl

      Hold up, hold up. Let's not be too ambitious now - I think 30 seconds is pushing the boat out.

      I never understood why people are so amazed at Usain Bolt finishing the 100m in under ten seconds but when I ejaculate in under ten seconds I have to sleep on the sofa. Where's my fucking medal!?

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      • Anonymous Post Author
        7 years ago

        Take this with the knowledge that I've never done it with anyone at all and all my experience is because I read stuff I shouldn't have... Try bringing your partner to climax first. If they're loving it they have no reason to kick you out.

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  • ews3
    7 years ago

    Be happy it is a sign that you are healthy. One day you will struggle to get it up.

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  • spunkluvr
    4 years ago

    I wank.

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  • Boneman
    5 years ago

    Just jack it. Why masturbate less? I prefer to masturbate more. I like feeling good.

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  • Spankerboy69
    6 years ago

    I jack off......

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  • Ratmanwakes
    6 years ago

    Beat off a good one with your morning shower. Starts the day off right.

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  • COCKSUCKERS
    7 years ago

    Slap it around and beat the ever living by Jesus out of it and show it whose boss.
    Problem solved.

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  • stevethomp
    7 years ago

    Why?

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  • randypete
    7 years ago

    have a wank or fuck the wife

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  • rayb12
    7 years ago

    chastity cage

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  • Cedric_Diggory
    7 years ago

    I just pretend that I am playing a game of Quidditch and ride that sucker to the bathroom to aim the balls for the bowl

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    • Chocobear24
      6 years ago

      I see ur a Harry Potter fan eh?

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  • CockTheRooster
    7 years ago

    I stick into the whore I am sleeping with.

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    • Cedric_Diggory
      7 years ago

      That's not a nice thing to call your mom

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  • Handyman
    7 years ago

    Either use it or pee, both works well. But not as nice.

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  • Jacob_Zuma_783
    7 years ago

    I either wait for it to sag while thinking about more important stuff or go take a piss. If I'm super-lazy and laying stomach-down then I have a habit of rubbing it on the mattress below.

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    • Chocobear24
      6 years ago

      Me too!

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  • Murun
    7 years ago

    A piss, leaning over the toilet at an awkward angle.

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  • Ellenna
    7 years ago

    You left "call a phone sex line" off the list: common resource for men who wake up aroused

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    • CreamPuffs
      7 years ago

      Really? I didn't know those were still in business. Interesting.

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      • Ellenna
        7 years ago

        Definitely still in business, that's my job.

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        • CreamPuffs
          7 years ago

          That's pretty neat.

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        • ogrelord
          7 years ago

          lemme smash

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  • SUCKMEOFFMOFO
    7 years ago

    Slam it in the old lady's ass , cunt or mouth cum dumpsters.
    Problem solved

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