I've thought about this too. It's an interesting question.
I think there's a logical fallacy at the heart of this, though - there is no such thing as a "_______ person". People like to think in absolutes, but I believe that's a faulty way of visualizing the human psyche. Everything is on a sliding scale. People can have tendencies, but what really matters is the frequency with which these tendencies occur and whether they are realized.
I'd be able to explain this better if I wasn't currently under medication.
I talked with my therapist a few weeks ago about how I've been trying to be more open and emotionally independent, relying less on the validation of others and more on validating myself by my own means. But then she asked me something significant - why? And I realized that to swing to another extreme wouldn't help, and I should probably try to find a happy medium. You just reminded me of that. There's wisdom in both. Like the devil and angel on our shoulders - the head lies between!
It's funny because it's sort of the same thing you accused Dappled of a couple of months ago.
I think you are on the right track though. Everyone struggles with being emotionally independent, but it sort of goes against our nature, don't you think. Even though we struggle for that independence, the draw of validation is powerful. I think we need some validation now and then. I think the trick is choosing who you need it from.
Everything taciturn has to be 'correct', I don't think he actually believes or practises everything he says. I wouldn't doubt if half the shit he writes is plagerized.
I'm not sure what I've done to offend you, but if it's something specific hopefully we can work it out. I don't want to anger people anymore, so I apologize if I did.
I admit that I can get assertive and aggressive in discussions, but it's only because I love having these debates regardless of whether people agree with me. There's something exhilarating to me about throwing ideas back and forth and building on them, and I've honestly grown a lot intellectually from talking to people on this site - I'm not there yet, but I think I'm going in the right direction. I'm definitely not a saint or a genius.
I can see why I come across as being obsessed with being "correct" because I tend to be very emphatic and stubborn. I know I come off as patronizing, so that's something I should try to fix. And the things I write are only plagiarized insofar as it's influenced by everyone else, including family, friends, writers, thinkers, and members on this site - but I would never just copy/paste something and pretend I wrote it. And I'll also give you that I don't practice everything I say - I try, but like I said, I'm not there yet.
But there's one thing you said here that I don't think is true. I can assure you that I do believe the things I say. I'm not sure why you would think otherwise but I'm sure there's some misunderstanding here. I'm a hugely flawed person, but I'm trying.
If you just plain hate me, that's totally understandable. I won't try to force you to like me. But I'd appreciate it if you didn't insult me out of nowhere, so again, if there's something specific that I did to insult you I'd be happy to talk about it and apologize.
I don't hate you, you just come off as insulting, or better than anyone else....which is something that a lot of people do (myself included), it's just the manner in which you do it. You have an attitude that you're the 'best, smartest' person on the site.
People can be smart in different ways. Can you skin a buck and run a trot line? lol (you probably don't get the reference)
I actually find your way of arguing far more insulting. At least being told that I am flat wrong, or an idiot, or to gtfo would be insulting to me. Further, your frequent use of "you" statements makes me believe that you are making some claim that you are objectively right. Is that not what you were directly critiquing above when you were taking about having to be 'correct'? When you say "you're wrong," I take it that you are implying you have some authority, or some knowledge that allows you to make that claim so surely. If so, what is that authority or knowledge? If, in fact, you have no such thing, then it seems to me that you are implying that you are right without having any basis for that implication. In that case, I read your comments as being based on the assumption that you are "better" or "smarter" than others yourself. Isn't that exactly the sort of attitude you seem to be condemning here? Or have I been reading your statements incorrectly?
Yeah, I am blunt....I think that's better than trying to be passive-agressive or holier-than-thou. It's fairly obvious that some people come here to 'prove' that they are smarter than everyone else....and that's a psychological issue. If you're mean, or blunt, then it's obvious....if you have to try to be smarter or 'above' everyone else, you have issues. GTFO, go somewhere else where you have competition. But, of course, you won't because you can't.....you know you can't hang. Like it's REAL hard to challenge teenagers....GMAB....get a grip.
Alright, well then I'll try to work on that. Is there anything specific about my tone or the way I phrase things that gives that impression? I swear I don't think of myself as the "best" or "smartest", and I don't want people to think that I do. Believe it or not I'm just trying to express myself, like everyone else here, so I'm going to try to do so in a less insulting way. In the meantime please don't insult me.
I think all three of us are pretty stubborn at times. :D
I don't think he plagiarizes what he writes, I've never had that impression. He's just articulate and has half a brain. I enjoy the "discussions", even when I'm not participating directly in them.
His open-mindedness makes him seem a lot older than he claims to be. Normally, people his age tend to see things more in absolutes. It's refreshing that he is different. I do wish he would express his personal feelings about some of the subjects though, instead of hiding behind logic all the time. But, if he's not comfortable exposing that side of himself, I don't think he should have to for our sakes.
Interesting. It is true that I hide behind logic. I've been trying really hard to be more open and sincere, but I guess the way that I do that is by analyzing and intellectualizing. But isn't that personal in itself? I feel like I'm really divulging parts of myself here, even if it doesn't come off that way. Maybe I should embrace my emotions more.
If you're trying to get me angry, it's not going to work, though I don't really understand why you'd want to do that. I get that I come off as condescending, so I'm sorry for that and I'm going to try not to. But I'm not trying to be mean to anyone. So please don't insult me, especially when everyone else is just trying to discuss the topic. Though it is oddly ironic that you're trying to tell me how insulting and condescending I am... by being insulting and condescending to me.
Did something bad happen? I've never seen you be mean before.
The difference is, I know I'm mean and shit. I don't care and I freely admit it. I don't make excuses or try to hide it underneath the same type of shit you do. I'm myself, you obviously purposely try to hide your nastiness. No comparison.
Better explanation - quoted from PumpkinKate in "does this make me bi" poll:
"Nothing 'makes you' bi, straight, gay, or whatever. Those are just words used to DESCRIBE what we feel. You're just you, and only you know exactly what that's like. The labels are just a linguistic tool to simplify the feelings in our speech.
You are you, and you like what you like. I don't think there's a solid word out there for someone who feels kinda like they like one gender, but they sometimes think about the other, but they've only been in relationships with one sex, but they sometimes wish they were the other sex, etc. etc.
People are far too complex to be summed up by a word like "bi". And no matter what word you end up using, you're still the same person you were long before that word ever came along and started making you question yourself."
That's basically what I was trying to say.
Freud also explains it pretty well with his conceptualization of the human mind - there is the id of instinctual desires and impulses, the ego which seeks to carry out the wishes of the id, and the superego which acts as a regulator, judging the morality of the id/ego desires and submitting them to the norm. To say that the id alone is what makes us who we are is to ignore a lot of our cognitive faculties.
Do your thoughts reveal anything about your person?
← View full post
I've thought about this too. It's an interesting question.
I think there's a logical fallacy at the heart of this, though - there is no such thing as a "_______ person". People like to think in absolutes, but I believe that's a faulty way of visualizing the human psyche. Everything is on a sliding scale. People can have tendencies, but what really matters is the frequency with which these tendencies occur and whether they are realized.
I'd be able to explain this better if I wasn't currently under medication.
Does that make me a scatterbrained person?
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equanimity
11 years ago
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[Old Memory]
11 years ago
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I wish you would act more scatterbrained. You are too serious. :P
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wigsplitz
11 years ago
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Am I? I think I'm overcompensating for being such a clown/asshole for so long.
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equanimity
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Ew clown asshole. Bad image, sorry.
You used to be a bit grumpy and antagonistic, but you were frustrated (like so many of us were).
I think you've done your penance, it's been over a month. Time to flex and stretch a bit.
I miss your sarcasm, but I enjoy your serious side too. Is there anyway we can have both?
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taciturn
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It's been a month with a new user name....
I talked with my therapist a few weeks ago about how I've been trying to be more open and emotionally independent, relying less on the validation of others and more on validating myself by my own means. But then she asked me something significant - why? And I realized that to swing to another extreme wouldn't help, and I should probably try to find a happy medium. You just reminded me of that. There's wisdom in both. Like the devil and angel on our shoulders - the head lies between!
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equanimity
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It's funny because it's sort of the same thing you accused Dappled of a couple of months ago.
I think you are on the right track though. Everyone struggles with being emotionally independent, but it sort of goes against our nature, don't you think. Even though we struggle for that independence, the draw of validation is powerful. I think we need some validation now and then. I think the trick is choosing who you need it from.
Everything taciturn has to be 'correct', I don't think he actually believes or practises everything he says. I wouldn't doubt if half the shit he writes is plagerized.
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I'm not sure what I've done to offend you, but if it's something specific hopefully we can work it out. I don't want to anger people anymore, so I apologize if I did.
I admit that I can get assertive and aggressive in discussions, but it's only because I love having these debates regardless of whether people agree with me. There's something exhilarating to me about throwing ideas back and forth and building on them, and I've honestly grown a lot intellectually from talking to people on this site - I'm not there yet, but I think I'm going in the right direction. I'm definitely not a saint or a genius.
I can see why I come across as being obsessed with being "correct" because I tend to be very emphatic and stubborn. I know I come off as patronizing, so that's something I should try to fix. And the things I write are only plagiarized insofar as it's influenced by everyone else, including family, friends, writers, thinkers, and members on this site - but I would never just copy/paste something and pretend I wrote it. And I'll also give you that I don't practice everything I say - I try, but like I said, I'm not there yet.
But there's one thing you said here that I don't think is true. I can assure you that I do believe the things I say. I'm not sure why you would think otherwise but I'm sure there's some misunderstanding here. I'm a hugely flawed person, but I'm trying.
If you just plain hate me, that's totally understandable. I won't try to force you to like me. But I'd appreciate it if you didn't insult me out of nowhere, so again, if there's something specific that I did to insult you I'd be happy to talk about it and apologize.
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I don't hate you, you just come off as insulting, or better than anyone else....which is something that a lot of people do (myself included), it's just the manner in which you do it. You have an attitude that you're the 'best, smartest' person on the site.
People can be smart in different ways. Can you skin a buck and run a trot line? lol (you probably don't get the reference)
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I actually find your way of arguing far more insulting. At least being told that I am flat wrong, or an idiot, or to gtfo would be insulting to me. Further, your frequent use of "you" statements makes me believe that you are making some claim that you are objectively right. Is that not what you were directly critiquing above when you were taking about having to be 'correct'? When you say "you're wrong," I take it that you are implying you have some authority, or some knowledge that allows you to make that claim so surely. If so, what is that authority or knowledge? If, in fact, you have no such thing, then it seems to me that you are implying that you are right without having any basis for that implication. In that case, I read your comments as being based on the assumption that you are "better" or "smarter" than others yourself. Isn't that exactly the sort of attitude you seem to be condemning here? Or have I been reading your statements incorrectly?
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wigsplitz
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Yeah, I am blunt....I think that's better than trying to be passive-agressive or holier-than-thou. It's fairly obvious that some people come here to 'prove' that they are smarter than everyone else....and that's a psychological issue. If you're mean, or blunt, then it's obvious....if you have to try to be smarter or 'above' everyone else, you have issues. GTFO, go somewhere else where you have competition. But, of course, you won't because you can't.....you know you can't hang. Like it's REAL hard to challenge teenagers....GMAB....get a grip.
Who are you, and why should I care? You don't know shit about me, so what's your point?
Alright, well then I'll try to work on that. Is there anything specific about my tone or the way I phrase things that gives that impression? I swear I don't think of myself as the "best" or "smartest", and I don't want people to think that I do. Believe it or not I'm just trying to express myself, like everyone else here, so I'm going to try to do so in a less insulting way. In the meantime please don't insult me.
I think all three of us are pretty stubborn at times. :D
I don't think he plagiarizes what he writes, I've never had that impression. He's just articulate and has half a brain. I enjoy the "discussions", even when I'm not participating directly in them.
His open-mindedness makes him seem a lot older than he claims to be. Normally, people his age tend to see things more in absolutes. It's refreshing that he is different. I do wish he would express his personal feelings about some of the subjects though, instead of hiding behind logic all the time. But, if he's not comfortable exposing that side of himself, I don't think he should have to for our sakes.
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How old are you, by the way?
Interesting. It is true that I hide behind logic. I've been trying really hard to be more open and sincere, but I guess the way that I do that is by analyzing and intellectualizing. But isn't that personal in itself? I feel like I'm really divulging parts of myself here, even if it doesn't come off that way. Maybe I should embrace my emotions more.
Open-minded?? mmmmmmkay.
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If you're trying to get me angry, it's not going to work, though I don't really understand why you'd want to do that. I get that I come off as condescending, so I'm sorry for that and I'm going to try not to. But I'm not trying to be mean to anyone. So please don't insult me, especially when everyone else is just trying to discuss the topic. Though it is oddly ironic that you're trying to tell me how insulting and condescending I am... by being insulting and condescending to me.
Did something bad happen? I've never seen you be mean before.
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The difference is, I know I'm mean and shit. I don't care and I freely admit it. I don't make excuses or try to hide it underneath the same type of shit you do. I'm myself, you obviously purposely try to hide your nastiness. No comparison.
Better explanation - quoted from PumpkinKate in "does this make me bi" poll:
"Nothing 'makes you' bi, straight, gay, or whatever. Those are just words used to DESCRIBE what we feel. You're just you, and only you know exactly what that's like. The labels are just a linguistic tool to simplify the feelings in our speech.
You are you, and you like what you like. I don't think there's a solid word out there for someone who feels kinda like they like one gender, but they sometimes think about the other, but they've only been in relationships with one sex, but they sometimes wish they were the other sex, etc. etc.
People are far too complex to be summed up by a word like "bi". And no matter what word you end up using, you're still the same person you were long before that word ever came along and started making you question yourself."
That's basically what I was trying to say.
Freud also explains it pretty well with his conceptualization of the human mind - there is the id of instinctual desires and impulses, the ego which seeks to carry out the wishes of the id, and the superego which acts as a regulator, judging the morality of the id/ego desires and submitting them to the norm. To say that the id alone is what makes us who we are is to ignore a lot of our cognitive faculties.
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Gena45
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I read that in a book :3
tendencies..i like the answer