Yeah.
One family member with BPD.
The shit part is that, pretty much as a function of the disorder, she won't admit to it or seek treatment for it. She has also been diagnosed with depression and anxiety but likely, it is a direct result of the BPD.
The problem with BPD is to acknowledge it, the sufferer of the disorder would have to acknowledge that it is not everyone around them that is the problem and that they are not the victim of a bunch of horrible assholes but rather it is their disorder that is warping their perception. As a function of BPD, admitting that you're not a victim is almost impossible and makes it difficult to seek treatment.
I'm sure she could be pushed into it but... her family is just fucking tired. 20 years of meds, therapy, meds, therapy and the roller coaster of addiction and mental illness and expecting from them each time to be accommodating and patient...
I know what you're going to say. They should just do it because poor her is mentally ill, but most regular people have a hard time retaining their patience and accommodating spirit after 20 years of utter bullshit and being told you're completely to blame for something by someone who refuses to even acknowledge their place in the problem.
That's exactly why I was wondering how common PDs were, because oftentimes people who don't have experience with them tend to have opinions "you're exagerating"/ "but it's your mother/ father, you owe them"/ "family first" etc that as someone affected just are bs. And that lack of awareness makes it difficult to talk to "normal" people about. Also many of those who DO have PDed family have too many problems of their own to still be able to have productive healthy exchanges among each other.
I don't disagree with detaching yourself. My family member with PD is like an emotional vampire. She can suck the jubilation out of a happy gathering anywhere she goes. You really just have to look out for yourself in the end. There's really not much you can do.
yes, sadly you can't force them to therapy, so you just have to let go and take control and responsibility of your own life for yourself and try to become a better parent one day.
Do your family members have a personality disorder?
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Yeah.
One family member with BPD.
The shit part is that, pretty much as a function of the disorder, she won't admit to it or seek treatment for it. She has also been diagnosed with depression and anxiety but likely, it is a direct result of the BPD.
The problem with BPD is to acknowledge it, the sufferer of the disorder would have to acknowledge that it is not everyone around them that is the problem and that they are not the victim of a bunch of horrible assholes but rather it is their disorder that is warping their perception. As a function of BPD, admitting that you're not a victim is almost impossible and makes it difficult to seek treatment.
I'm sure she could be pushed into it but... her family is just fucking tired. 20 years of meds, therapy, meds, therapy and the roller coaster of addiction and mental illness and expecting from them each time to be accommodating and patient...
I know what you're going to say. They should just do it because poor her is mentally ill, but most regular people have a hard time retaining their patience and accommodating spirit after 20 years of utter bullshit and being told you're completely to blame for something by someone who refuses to even acknowledge their place in the problem.
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Anonymous Post Author
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That's exactly why I was wondering how common PDs were, because oftentimes people who don't have experience with them tend to have opinions "you're exagerating"/ "but it's your mother/ father, you owe them"/ "family first" etc that as someone affected just are bs. And that lack of awareness makes it difficult to talk to "normal" people about. Also many of those who DO have PDed family have too many problems of their own to still be able to have productive healthy exchanges among each other.
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I don't disagree with detaching yourself. My family member with PD is like an emotional vampire. She can suck the jubilation out of a happy gathering anywhere she goes. You really just have to look out for yourself in the end. There's really not much you can do.
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yes, sadly you can't force them to therapy, so you just have to let go and take control and responsibility of your own life for yourself and try to become a better parent one day.