no. it depends on the situation. if you find a really good (and engaging, happy) place for them and they are also impossible to care for on your own, and you are in fact basically on your own in regards to caring for them (a 24 hour job) and feel overwhelmed...then i'd say not a 'bad person' (not a great practice to think in 'bad or good' terms, though)....especially if you make efforts to visit and give them as much love as possible, and make sure they're comfortable where they are. i only say all of this because i have 4 older relatives with no immediate family other than me, and i often wonder how in the hell i'm supposed to take care of them all if and when they become infirm, by myself...it is overwhelming to think about and i've seen how difficult it is to take care of one infirm person (my grandma)...my family is determined to keep her at home till she dies and that is beautiful, but it currently involves the intensive help of 7 or so people because she has dementia and needs constant supervision no matter the time of day or night.
Do you immediately assume that...
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no. it depends on the situation. if you find a really good (and engaging, happy) place for them and they are also impossible to care for on your own, and you are in fact basically on your own in regards to caring for them (a 24 hour job) and feel overwhelmed...then i'd say not a 'bad person' (not a great practice to think in 'bad or good' terms, though)....especially if you make efforts to visit and give them as much love as possible, and make sure they're comfortable where they are. i only say all of this because i have 4 older relatives with no immediate family other than me, and i often wonder how in the hell i'm supposed to take care of them all if and when they become infirm, by myself...it is overwhelming to think about and i've seen how difficult it is to take care of one infirm person (my grandma)...my family is determined to keep her at home till she dies and that is beautiful, but it currently involves the intensive help of 7 or so people because she has dementia and needs constant supervision no matter the time of day or night.