Coffee enemas changed my life

Doing this has changed my life. I'm more focused, have more energy, and just feel absolutely great! It can focus better than ever, and I just feel absolutely great! And it's very euphoric, almost mdma like when taken rectally, at least that has been my experience. I'm honestly surprised that people still drink it, since this is so much better!

Voting Results
19% Normal
Based on 16 votes (3 yes)
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Comments ( 29 )
  • I bet it’s great n all till you can’t shit without it.

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    • Nikclaire

      Lol

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  • CozmoWank

    I'll be sure to ask for one the next time I'm at a Starbuck's drive-thru.

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  • WeirdGuyFromTheSouth

    If i liked that it felt like mdma i would just do mdma

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  • McBean

    Better squirt decaf up your butt. Otherwise, your blood pressure will keep on climbing.

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  • waddell5959

    I never tried it but in going to thanks dude

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  • waddell5959

    WOW that's a great idea thanks.

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  • RoseIsabella

    I think it would give me a heart attack, because I can't tolerate a lot of caffeine.

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    • Ellenna

      Or an arse attack?

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      • RoseIsabella

        Maybe, because it probably causes some crazy diarrhea. My caffeine intolerance has gotten so bad that I can't eat too much dark chocolate. Damn high blood pressure!

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        • Ellenna

          I have high blood pressure too but haven't noticed either caffeine (2 cups a day) or dark chocolate (big block lasts at least a month) affecting it.

          Licorice is known to raise BP, which is a nuisance, because I love it.

          I've found uncontrolled stress is the worst thing for my BP, which usually means I haven't been meditating enough.

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          • RoseIsabella

            I love licorice, but I haven't had any in years. Do you like hibiscus tea? Hibiscus tea is supposed to be good for high blood pressure.

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            • Ellenna

              PS: Personally I reckon cannabis lowers blood pressure, as well as expanding bronchial passages, so good for emphysema and asthma - not smoking it, eating it

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            • Ellenna

              No, I hadn't heard that and so haven't tried it. High BP is one thing where I don't mind trying "alternative remedies" because I have a wrist monitor so could check whether or not they're working.

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          • RoseIsabella

            Oh yeah, I definitely get stressed out a lot! I have to take an antispasmodic for lower abdominal pain that tends to occur after bowel movements, apparently I have a spastic colon/IBS. The gastroenterologist told me that my problem is most likely caused by stress, and I almost died inside when he said, "now we just have figure out what us causing the stress". I wanted to say everything is stressful lately. That stuff got really bad after my stupid ex-boyfriend freaked out on me. I used to get nosebleeds everyday right after that situation. Now I'm trying to organize my home, and get myself together to start going to the gym I joined in January.

            Sometimes I can see the artery in my neck throbbing.

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  • Confused_Italian

    idk about anyone else, but coffee puts me right to sleep

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  • Muser

    I rather drink it, just add more sugar...

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  • Damn, I just did it tonight, and I have to say it's awesome. Like this isn't anything like a caffeine buzz type feeling. It literally feels like I'm rolling, like this feeling of just loving everyone. And damn do I love scratching my head on this stuff :)

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  • Ellenna

    How often are you doing this? If frequently, you do realise you can cause yourself permanent damage and end up wearing incontinence pants for the rest of your life?

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    • I do it every day, because it just feels awesome! The best high I ever experienced, and the incontinence thing doesn't make sense. Because the nozzle is literally no bigger than a finger.

      I have to say, the rush is literally like taking ecstasy. And without any side effects whatsoever, and completely legal! It's great!

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      • Ellenna

        I understand heroin and cocaine and other addictive drugs also feel awesome but that doesn't mean they or coffee enemas are healthy.

        You're setting yourself up for at least temporary and probably permanent bowel problems because as well as forcing shit out you're also forcing out healthy bowel bacteria.

        You sound addicted to me: maybe there's an Enema Lovers Anonymous you could join, or maybe start one?

        Seriously, this is not healthy!

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  • Cuntsiclestick

    If you're clogged just take in more fiber and water.

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    • Ellenna

      OP isn't doing because of clogging but because h/she loves it and sounds addicted to it

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      • WeirdGuyFromTheSouth

        Ive seen TV shows about people getting addicted to coffee enemas. They must be really good...

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        • Oh it's amazing! One of the most euphoric experiences one can have. I said it's literally like mdma euphoria! It's truly an incredible high!

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  • No thanks

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