I don't judge others for having casual sex, it's a personal decision and people can do what they like as long as everyone is a consenting adult. And God knows I put it about a fair bit when I was younger. And I have no regrets about that. But I was extremely careful with contraception and was quite choosey about who I slept with.
My issue though is the baby making potential. Don't underestimate this. Every single time you have sex, no matter how careful you are, you could make a baby. I think a lot of problems in our society are traced back to people accidentally making babies - it means people end up having to have abortions, which can be psychologically traumatic, expensive and carry health risks (not to mention you are extinguishing a life). It also causes a huge rift between the sexes over how to proceed equally - there is no equal course of action that gives both parents any fair shot at the choice over what happens to their baby, it is always going to be an unequal setting no matter how the law is laid out because the pregnancy is happening inside the mother's body. Just look at the raging pro life/ pro choice debate - There's a lot of anger and upset on both sides from people who passionately believe that they are right.
The alternative to abortion is that two people who don't know each other have a baby. Statistically speaking two people who don't know each other having a baby is terrible for society. The ideal environment for a child to be raised in is one where the parents have known each other for a long time, live together in financial security and have actually made a conscious decision to raise a child. This situation used to be the norm, but due to the rise of causal sex it has become more of a rarity. This is bad news for society as a whole. Regardless of your own personal beliefs about childrearing you cannot deny that how the majority are raising their children is of huge importance for the future of our society.
I also agree with others that casual sex is a bit shit/pointless. When I was young I told myself it was great fun, but as I got older I realised it was actually quite empty and a little bit pathetic. You don't need to be having lots of meaningless sex all the time. It's so much more satisfying to have sex with someone you actually have a real connection with. That kind of sex is mind blowing and no amount of encounters with strangers can come close. And if you can't have the good stuff then why bother at all? It's not like there are any other benefits to sex and it carries a lot of risks.
I most certainly see your point about the risks of an unplanned pregnancy. But like I said in the post, people should be able to take those risks for the pleasure and good times they can have. I also can't stand people like you saying casual sex is pointless, like really? Sex feels fucking awesome and that is almost always worth the risk you run. Other things people do just for enjoyment have risks and yet people do those! And comlared to other things, sex definetly brings more pleasure. You think it is pointless because it is just for pleasure, but those are not the same thing! Pleasure is the point! It sounds to me like sex for you is about the personal connection more than the pleasure and that is fine but please understand that that is certainly not everyone. So don't say things like "casual sex is a bit shit/pointless" just because it seems that way to you.
No, the point I was making, amongst others, is that it is less pleasurable with a stranger. Strangers don't have any prior experience of you and your hot buttons. Someone who has had sex with you many times before can read your body like braille and take you to fucking heaven and back again. And yes, a deeper connection will intensify this pleasure even further. Perhaps your experience is different to mine, and that's ok, but you did ask for people's opinions so I gave mine.
And who are "people like me"? I would like to meet these people. Perhaps we could have a tea party.
Its no doubt that having expirienced sex with someone before means they can push your 'buttons' better, and that helps. But to me it seems like that benefit is offset by the fact that having sex with someone new can bring a type of novelty that is enjoyable. If you have sex with many diffetent types, you expirience more. Some people are better at oral than others or make more arousong sounds, some people love anal and some don't, some people love kinky shit some don't, and some are just attractive in different ways that can help turn you on more. For people who love multiple aspects of sex, having multiple partners and more casual sex can allow you opportunities to have a different expirience each time.
And when I say people like you, I mean some people in my life who look down on me for having casual sex, and also some other hooligans in the comment section.
I don't know why I've been lumped in with people who look down on you - please refer to the opening line of my initial comment. In my experience people are more likely to look down on those who don't engage in casual sex because our society encourages casual sex so much. So I'm surprised to hear you feel that so many people are looking down on you for it.
I really don't care whether or not you engage in casual sex. It was only being talked about because you specifically asked. I can see you've taken offence to a lot of the comments here. I'm really not sure what you want?
You said earlier that sex is less pleasurble with strangers, and I disagree with that. It CAN be, and for SOME people it may always be, but stating it like that with a blanket statment is just not fair. Sex can definetly be better with a stranger, for reasons I eluded to in my earlier reply.
I feel like people personally don't like it, but they are short sighted and say that it is dumb pointless or empty. I say people should have casual sex more often and not judge people for doing so regularly. Most people in the comments don't sound like they agree, even though they are not very direct.
You are SO on point! Pleasure is the point! As for risks, most things we do involve risks. I’m going to have as much casual sex as I can, as often as I can, with as many as I can (male AND female)! No shame and no regrets!
Good for you! I'm glad I have some full on support here! People say don't have casual sex because you might get an std, but the chances are not much different that you will get hurt playing a sport or get in a wreck driving to work or something! Why do people feel guilty about doing something just for pleasure? It continues to baffle me.
Casual sex is GREAT... Change my mind
← View full post
I don't judge others for having casual sex, it's a personal decision and people can do what they like as long as everyone is a consenting adult. And God knows I put it about a fair bit when I was younger. And I have no regrets about that. But I was extremely careful with contraception and was quite choosey about who I slept with.
My issue though is the baby making potential. Don't underestimate this. Every single time you have sex, no matter how careful you are, you could make a baby. I think a lot of problems in our society are traced back to people accidentally making babies - it means people end up having to have abortions, which can be psychologically traumatic, expensive and carry health risks (not to mention you are extinguishing a life). It also causes a huge rift between the sexes over how to proceed equally - there is no equal course of action that gives both parents any fair shot at the choice over what happens to their baby, it is always going to be an unequal setting no matter how the law is laid out because the pregnancy is happening inside the mother's body. Just look at the raging pro life/ pro choice debate - There's a lot of anger and upset on both sides from people who passionately believe that they are right.
The alternative to abortion is that two people who don't know each other have a baby. Statistically speaking two people who don't know each other having a baby is terrible for society. The ideal environment for a child to be raised in is one where the parents have known each other for a long time, live together in financial security and have actually made a conscious decision to raise a child. This situation used to be the norm, but due to the rise of causal sex it has become more of a rarity. This is bad news for society as a whole. Regardless of your own personal beliefs about childrearing you cannot deny that how the majority are raising their children is of huge importance for the future of our society.
I also agree with others that casual sex is a bit shit/pointless. When I was young I told myself it was great fun, but as I got older I realised it was actually quite empty and a little bit pathetic. You don't need to be having lots of meaningless sex all the time. It's so much more satisfying to have sex with someone you actually have a real connection with. That kind of sex is mind blowing and no amount of encounters with strangers can come close. And if you can't have the good stuff then why bother at all? It's not like there are any other benefits to sex and it carries a lot of risks.
--
Anonymous Post Author
4 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
-1
-1
I most certainly see your point about the risks of an unplanned pregnancy. But like I said in the post, people should be able to take those risks for the pleasure and good times they can have. I also can't stand people like you saying casual sex is pointless, like really? Sex feels fucking awesome and that is almost always worth the risk you run. Other things people do just for enjoyment have risks and yet people do those! And comlared to other things, sex definetly brings more pleasure. You think it is pointless because it is just for pleasure, but those are not the same thing! Pleasure is the point! It sounds to me like sex for you is about the personal connection more than the pleasure and that is fine but please understand that that is certainly not everyone. So don't say things like "casual sex is a bit shit/pointless" just because it seems that way to you.
--
SwickDinging
4 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
1
1
-
[Old Memory]
4 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
-2
-2
No, the point I was making, amongst others, is that it is less pleasurable with a stranger. Strangers don't have any prior experience of you and your hot buttons. Someone who has had sex with you many times before can read your body like braille and take you to fucking heaven and back again. And yes, a deeper connection will intensify this pleasure even further. Perhaps your experience is different to mine, and that's ok, but you did ask for people's opinions so I gave mine.
And who are "people like me"? I would like to meet these people. Perhaps we could have a tea party.
--
Anonymous Post Author
4 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
-1
-1
Its no doubt that having expirienced sex with someone before means they can push your 'buttons' better, and that helps. But to me it seems like that benefit is offset by the fact that having sex with someone new can bring a type of novelty that is enjoyable. If you have sex with many diffetent types, you expirience more. Some people are better at oral than others or make more arousong sounds, some people love anal and some don't, some people love kinky shit some don't, and some are just attractive in different ways that can help turn you on more. For people who love multiple aspects of sex, having multiple partners and more casual sex can allow you opportunities to have a different expirience each time.
And when I say people like you, I mean some people in my life who look down on me for having casual sex, and also some other hooligans in the comment section.
--
SwickDinging
4 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
2
2
I don't know why I've been lumped in with people who look down on you - please refer to the opening line of my initial comment. In my experience people are more likely to look down on those who don't engage in casual sex because our society encourages casual sex so much. So I'm surprised to hear you feel that so many people are looking down on you for it.
I really don't care whether or not you engage in casual sex. It was only being talked about because you specifically asked. I can see you've taken offence to a lot of the comments here. I'm really not sure what you want?
--
Anonymous Post Author
4 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
0
0
You said earlier that sex is less pleasurble with strangers, and I disagree with that. It CAN be, and for SOME people it may always be, but stating it like that with a blanket statment is just not fair. Sex can definetly be better with a stranger, for reasons I eluded to in my earlier reply.
I feel like people personally don't like it, but they are short sighted and say that it is dumb pointless or empty. I say people should have casual sex more often and not judge people for doing so regularly. Most people in the comments don't sound like they agree, even though they are not very direct.
--
SwickDinging
4 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
0
0
See More Comments =>
Ok, so go and have your casual sex then and stop worrying so much about what everyone else thinks of you. Life is too short for that. Have fun!
You are SO on point! Pleasure is the point! As for risks, most things we do involve risks. I’m going to have as much casual sex as I can, as often as I can, with as many as I can (male AND female)! No shame and no regrets!
--
Anonymous Post Author
4 years ago
|
pl
Comment Hidden (
show
)
Report
0
0
Good for you! I'm glad I have some full on support here! People say don't have casual sex because you might get an std, but the chances are not much different that you will get hurt playing a sport or get in a wreck driving to work or something! Why do people feel guilty about doing something just for pleasure? It continues to baffle me.