Can't get child's birth certificate for adoption due to hospital red flag

Ok so my situation is my ex and I had a child together. At the hospital the child was born and my ex didn't let me be there at the hospital so I wasn't around at all. The hospital wouldn't let her take the child home and so they had a family they knew they told the hospital they want that family to take her home because they wanted to adopt her so they did take her home. However the hospital red flagged the birth certificate. And it has been 10 months and the foster family can't get her good health care adopted her or do anything without getting the birth certificate. They tried to get a copy and they wouldn't let them because of it and they arnt removing the red flag. We are trying to do this without children services because there's no reason for them to be involved and have the risk of them taking the child away from the foster family. My ex and I want to give her to the family also the reason the hospital red flagged it was because they didn't want my ex to get the chance to get the child back they said because she has serious mental issues and is living in a mental home because of her issues so what can we do anyone know anything about this? How can we still get the child's birth certificate?

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Based on 7 votes (1 yes)
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Comments ( 23 )
  • SwickDinging

    To be honest it sounds like it would be in the best interests of the child to get Child Protection Services involved.

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  • donteatstuffoffthesidewalk

    google family lawyers

    they need one at this point

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  • Boojum

    This whole situation sounds like a red flag to me.

    I don't know about this "hospital red-flagging a birth certificate" thing, but my understanding is the rules now in the USA are that the only people who can get a copy of a birth certificate are the person whose birth it records, that person's parents or someone else who can show a valid reason for needing the certificate. Birth certificates can be used as a starting document when someone wants to create a false identity, so they aren't handed out to anyone who wants one.

    As far as I can understand the OP, the mother of the child is incapable of caring for it, and for some bizarre reason, the hospital handed it over to some random couple nominated by her. I don't understand how any hospital in a civilised part of the world would do this without the involvement of the local equivalent of CPS.

    In any case, it seems pretty clear that you and the people now caring for the child believe that if CPS was to get involved, they would judge the informal foster parents to be incapable or inappropriate people to carry out that role. If that's so, then it's all the more reason for CPS to become involved.

    I assume you live in the USA, and I am aware that the foster care system in many - perhaps most - parts of America is borked due to social care being given a low priority by the state and local governments that have to fund it. So I can understand why parents would be very concerned about their child going into "the system". But the fact is that you're talking about a person here, not a puppy, so you can't just hand the kid over to someone else and expect the legal system to accept the pretence that those people are now the child's parents.

    I do understand that CPS has a very bad reputation in some places, but I suspect that you have to accept that they will need to be involved if the child's mother, you and the people currently caring for the child want the foster-parent relationship recognised by officialdom.

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    • GaelicPotato

      Involve the CPS.

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  • --

    What?

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  • Mammal-lover

    I'm pretty positive this was already posted cause I remember thinking wow I'm just reading this as a run on sentence and got annoyed and left in the middle.

    So yea stop reposting stuff mate

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    • Nikclaire

      https://www.isitnormal.com/post/mother-was-giving-baby-for-adoption-but-may-not-because-i-want-custody-280436

      Same user 11 months ago.

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      • Mammal-lover

        Ha! Thank you! Kisses love you are beautiful.

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    • Boojum

      I believe Redeyes when he says he hasn't posted this query before, but he does have a posting history here, and it's high-proof Springer.

      There are times when I despair for the future of humanity.

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      • Mammal-lover

        I take that back nikclaire provided evidence against this fishy mallacker

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      • Mammal-lover

        Hmm whatever I guess it isn't overly important

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    • REDEYES22

      I just posted this now

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  • howaminotmyself

    This is exactly why child services need to be involved. Poor kid.

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  • Nikclaire

    Do you have mental issues as well?

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    • REDEYES22

      Kinda

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      • Nikclaire

        I doubt CPS would remove a child from a foster family they are already placed in.

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        • Mammal-lover

          Yea they donf unless it's to put them into another foster home. Seriously you got disliked? What a little bitch. I was in foster care before let me tell ya they dont five a shit about you especislly if they have a child you are just a paycheck.

          They certainly do not like having you in one location. I've been in so many diffrent schools during my short time in foster care it's not even funny all the people I met. Out of all of them there was only one that actually cared and was a good home. I wouldn't mind meeting them again catching up actually.

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          • Nikclaire

            Dude I recieved 3 downvotes just for stating where I was born 🤣

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            • Mammal-lover

              Wtf!? Someone really has a hard on for ya haha. So redonkuloss. What you do to piss them off? Not even those who hate me for my sexuality ride me that hard. But you say so much as hello and its downvoted haha

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          • Nikclaire

            Paying people to foster is one of those things that "sounds" good, you know, provide people with money for the child's upbringing to ensure they are clothed and well fed.

            Really all it does is bring the rats out of the dark to get their cheese. It's really a shame that in this day and age they can't provide a debit card that can only be used for food and childs clothing. It wouldn't be too difficult to accomplish.

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            • Mammal-lover

              Yup. It is sad. Frankly I dont think the government cares one bit about any of it. They are to focused on building a wall or some other equally stupid thing to bother focusing on what really matters. Improving the lives of children and animals alike. Actually doing something to protect them and prosecuting the abusers. It's a sad world we live in.

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            • Ellenna

              In response to your suggestion about a card system, that has actually been introduced in some parts of Australia (guess what, mainly communities where a lot of Indigenous people live). So instead of government benefits (which are well below the poverty line anyway) being paid into bank accounts, people only part of their benefits and the balance is on a card which can't be used for alcohol, cigarettes or gambling.

              It's been strongly opposed by some and highly praised by others.

              I'm on benefits myself and it wouldn't really affect me if I had to have a card, because I don't gamble or smoke and am only a very light occasional drinker. However, I'd be highly insulted by some government system doing my financial budgeting for me. I've seen financial counsellors a few times and they say there's no way I could economise more than I already do.

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