Can internet relationship work irl?

63% Normal

I met this guy few months ago and I feel like he's my soulmate. I had some serious and long lasting relationships before IRL but I never felt like this. We have many things in common but it's more like we get each other. We can relate and understand that other person and we know how to deal with each other moods and problems.
The thing is he's from America and I'm from middle Europe. And also that I had experience before when I met one guy from internet when we had romantic relationship but when we saw each other IRL all the attraction disappeared ! I'm scared that this might be it too. But I can't date other people IRL because they can't understand me like he can.

Voting Results

63% Normal

Based on 16 votes (10 yes)

Help us keep this site organized and clean. Thanks!

[ Report Post ]

Comments ( 33 )

Tommythecaty

3 years ago

Develop the social skills to meet people in real life and getting to know them rather than messing about doing it on the internet only to be let down when finally (if ever) meeting

Comment Hidden ( show )

4

4
- hauntedbysandwiches
  
  3 years ago
  
  Disagree. You get to know someone much better online than in person because you both let your walls down more easily.
  
  I met my partner online and it's the best and deepest relationship I've ever had.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  3
  
  3
  - Tommythecaty
    
    3 years ago
    
    Yes and you could’ve done the same without it, and there are always exceptions to rule. But it being a better alternative is pure nonsense, It worked just fine before the internet. Now since the rise of internet dating people using it primarily instead of secondarily tend to have a ton of social disabilities. And further it’s much easier to lie about ones person on the internet and build a character than it is face to face.
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    0
    
    0
- litelander8
  
  3 years ago
  
  This.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  1
  
  1
- SweetElis
  
  3 years ago
  
  I'm an extrovert. I have no problem talking to people irl. It's more that I can't find people with similar interests etc. like that.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
  - FromTheSouthWeirdMan
    
    3 years ago
    
    Have u seen his pics?
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    0
    
    0
    - leggs91200
      
      3 years ago
      
      He might have sent a real photo of someone else.
      
      Comment Hidden ( show )
      
      1
      
      1
      - FromTheSouthWeirdMan
        
        3 years ago
        
        Ohhh boy
        
        Comment Hidden ( show )
        
        1
        
        1
    - SweetElis
      
      3 years ago
      
      Yea I saw his pics
      
      Comment Hidden ( show )
      
      0
      
      0
Fussmann

3 years ago

It can definitely work. Just be honest with each other so there are no surprises when you finally do meet. And don't go into meeting with expectation of anything happening. You might meet and have zero chemistry, you might end up fucking on the subway on the way to their place -- as far as I know there is no way to predict that "physical chemistry".

Comment Hidden ( show )

3

3
olderdude-xx

3 years ago

They can work... but, in all honesty its rare.

I've been on the "internet" dating scene since about 1997.... and there have been many that seemed so perfect. Yet, within a few minutes of meeting it was obvious that it was not.

At the same time I did in fact meet my wife via an internet dating service (and expensive one that actually validated that the other person existed in other countries and was really looking). My wife is also from Europe. She also talked about all the strange contacts and the ones that didn't work out.

I've estimated that my wife was about the ten-thousandth Lady I had contact with via the internet.

I wish you well... But, my experience is that its far to easy to present a fake front and hide things over the internet and social media. You need to meet them in person, and spend time together with them to know if they actually could be.

As far as how well things worked: So my wife and I emailed a lot, and did Skype (she could speak little English, and I only knew a few words of her languages). She had a planned vacation trip to the USA about 4 months after we initial met on the internet.

I traveled to where she was staying during her visit to the USA. 1st meeting was in a shopping mall. If we liked each other we would go the the cities Art Museum for a few hours. If that turned out well - she would visit me for a week - and then return back to her planned vacation.

She stayed longer than a week, and I proposed I think it was 9 days later... and we were married about 2.5 months later; and started the legal processes for her to become a legal resident before her normal tourist status expired. She did not return to Europe until she had a Green Card.

It has worked out very well...

I wish you the best,

Comment Hidden ( show )

3

3
- hauntedbysandwiches
  
  3 years ago
  
  Rare? Most people are married to someone they met online now. It's extremely common.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
- SweetElis
  
  3 years ago
  
  Oh myy your story is so sweet and wholesome! Are you still together? I wish you the best too!
  I guess it's pretty rare to find someone like that. And I guess there's nothing else to do but give it a time and if coronavirus will go away soon maybe even meet-up. There's no other way to find out if it's gonna workout or not, right?
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
dirtybirdy

3 years ago

I suppose it could work sometimes for some people, but not me. I desire physical lovin very often so it ain't my thang.

Comment Hidden ( show )

1

1
thepuppet

3 years ago

It's doable. Every relationship is different, though. You'd know better than anyone here. Communication/honesty is the most important- you should know what you both look like and parts of what your lives are IRL.

Comment Hidden ( show )

1

1
- thepuppet
  
  3 years ago
  
  Out of curiosity, which app did you meet him on?
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
  - SweetElis
    
    3 years ago
    
    On Discord server
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    0
    
    0
    - thepuppet
      
      3 years ago
      
      Oh, okay. Yeah I've seen Discord relationships work out. Keep going with it, I guess, and if you guys really have a chance then I guess you'll see in the long run.
      
      Comment Hidden ( show )
      
      0
      
      0
McSorley

3 years ago

LOL, you may be "together" online but I guarantee you he's fucking other women. We're sexual creatures. Jerkin' the pickle exclusively just doesn't cut it for most guys.

Comment Hidden ( show )

1

1
leggs91200

3 years ago

When talking to people on the web, it is easy to form this idea of what they are like in real life.

You know they say people talk shit because they can hide behind a screen? People can just as easily portray themselves as a perfect person while hiding behind the screen.

Plus, are you sure it isn't some Arab pretending to be Amedican?
If he starts asking for money because his mom is sick or he somehow got held hostage at the airport, you will know he is trying to rip you off.

I saw this report once where some woman thought she was talking to some good looking American firefighter but he was an Arab. The guy didn't even sound American, how in the hell did she get tricked?

Comment Hidden ( show )

1

1
- SweetElis
  
  3 years ago
  
  That's racist ... People scam people and they don't have to be Arabian. But I get what you are trying to say. Thank you for trying to help and warn me about what might happen. Also I don't think he looks like some top model(firefighter) just a regular guy :)
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
  - leggs91200
    
    3 years ago
    
    HAVE you two spoke on the phone/skype or whatever?
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    0
    
    0
    - SweetElis
      
      3 years ago
      
      Yes we have :)
      
      Comment Hidden ( show )
      
      0
      
      0
      - leggs91200
        
        3 years ago
        
        Of course meeting RL is the only way to find out. With getting to know each other somewhat on the web, at least you have an idea of who it is.
        
        Comment Hidden ( show )
        
        1
        
        1
my_life_my_way

3 years ago

One of you will probably be too tempted by people in real life and end up cheating, you can’t have a whole relationship with no physical contact.

Comment Hidden ( show )

1

1
- SweetElis
  
  3 years ago
  
  Yeah I got that but what I'm thinking we would meet maybe in a year or so. But I'm struggling with the idea that when we would see each other IRL it would just not be like it's now.
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
Kool_owl

3 years ago

Try visiting each other , seeing someone on line is a lot different than seeing them daily .
You can see how they really are .

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
Mammal-lover

3 years ago

Uhlikley to succeed. There are expectations but not ususlly

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
bbrown95

3 years ago

I couldn't imagine it being very likely, honestly, but then again I couldn't imagine falling in love with someone I had never met in real life, either.

Like others have said, it's not only easy for the other person to portray themselves as perfect or someone they're not, but it's also easy to form an idealized version of that person in your head that isn't accurate with what the real person is actually like. Also, it's hard to have a relationship with someone you've never met in person. To me, I guess I don't understand the point of a relationship if all you do is text or video call each other. I don't even see the point of "online friends", let alone an online relationship, to be honest. But, that's just my two cents.

Comment Hidden ( show )

0

0
- SweetElis
  
  3 years ago
  
  Why you don't understand the point of online friends? What if you don't have friends who have similar hobbies or there are no people near that have similar hobbies but in some other countries yes? So you can connect and support each other. Or you can have friends that comfort you at least online if you don't have them irl
  
  Comment Hidden ( show )
  
  0
  
  0
  - bbrown95
    
    3 years ago
    
    I just don't see the point in just texting, calling, or video chatting someone all the time. I much prefer in person communication, and I want friends I can actually hang out with and go do stuff with. Just talking online or over the phone and never seeing each other does nothing for me, really.
    
    I also see people I've never met in person as essentially strangers and can't get close to them. I am unable to develop a connection with someone without having met them in person.
    
    Comment Hidden ( show )
    
    0
    
    0
    - SweetElis
      
      3 years ago
      
      Hm I get it. Yeah obviously irl friends are better because you can do stuff together.
      
      Comment Hidden ( show )
      
      1
      
      1
      - bbrown95
        
        3 years ago
        
        Yeah, I love being able to physically hang out and go do stuff like trying new restaurants together, seeing movies, going to the park, etc.
        
        Comment Hidden ( show )
        
        0
        
        0

Are You Normal?

Can internet relationship work irl?