Bf doesn’t think i’m the victim in a dv case

22% Normal
13 Comments

so i was involved in a domestic violence situation with my bf now of 2 and a half years. it happened 3 months ago. he choked me, spit on me and some other stuff. i wasn’t hurt i was fine. but i texted my sister and i guess she texted my mom and called the cops and they came. i was obviously like scared and sad and mad and i told the cops what he did and he got arrested. we somehow got over this but today we had a fight about it. he told me that i shoudnt of told the cops and that he is the victim and all this wouldn’t of happened if i just of left when he told me to. we love each other and he has been great to me but he’s been rude about this. what do you think?

Voting Results
22% Normal
Based on 9 votes (2 yes)
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Comments ( 13 )
  • [Old Memory]
    4 years ago

    Why ask when you don’t truly care what people think? Just go look at all the other ones you’ve posted and take the advice to leave.

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  • charli.m
    4 years ago

    That's what abusers do.

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  • CDmale4fem
    4 years ago

    I think you are a fucking idiot to stay with a guy that "loves" you like that. If he wasn't so busy trying to make people do what he says, when and how, if he WAS A REAL MAN, he would not put his hands on you. And to spit on you is almost as low as he can get. But when he starts pissing on you someday then you might find the courage to tell him to "NEVER PUT HIS HANDS ON YOU AGAIN" since you know where he sleeps.

    And really you "LOVE" EACH OTHER.? IF YOU WERE MY DAUGHTER, I WOULD BE LOCKED UP FOR KICKEING HIS ASS ALL OVERTOWN. if you had a daughter that was UN your situation what would you tell her?

    I can't wait to be in love again, so I can choke her, smack her around, and spit on her. I will send you an invite to the wedding.

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  • Jimbo24
    4 years ago

    These commenters are naive. She'll never leave. This "smack a ho" dude's giving her her ideal life: he keeps her in her place, all the while giving her the possibility to constantly complain/brag about it to other people and play victim.

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      4 years ago

      wait what do you mean brag about it to other people?and who’s playing victim?? whaaat

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      • Jimbo24
        4 years ago

        Bragging that the guy's keeping you in your place, is what I meant. That's fine. Girls do that. And since you didn't even call the cops yourself, it tells me that you don't mind be roughed up every now and then. Or you find it necessary or something.

        You just have a runny mouth and share everything with the people around you. Except the people around you don't know how you're experiencing your relationship with the guy, or whatever happens with him. So when they hear you got slapped or choked or something, then they'll just go by that have the guy arrested and try to keep him away from you.

        Learn to shut up about those things, would be my advice, unless you're really, genuinely upset and displeased about them. Or unless you share them with someone who actually gets what you're experiencing and doesn't freak out about it.

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  • SwickDinging
    4 years ago

    I think you should leave him. You've been posting about this for months, why are you still with him?

    Of course he told you that he is the victim, that's exactly what abusers do. Read this post back and imagine it's your future daughter or your best friend saying all of this. What would you advise them to do?

    LEAVE HIM

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      4 years ago

      do you think he will ever leave me

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      • SwickDinging
        4 years ago

        I don't know. Maybe. I think you shouldn't worry about that and just leave him.

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  • Primus
    4 years ago

    Leave. Go as far away as possible and hide if you need to. Pack your bags while he's gone and take off if you don't think he can handle you telling him you're done.

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  • RoseIsabella
    4 years ago

    Your boyfriend is a terrible abuser, and you need to leave him! So far you have wasted two years with that piece of shit, so leave him already!

    You need to read a book called Codependent No More by Melody Beattie!

    Are you still seeing a therapist?

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    • Anonymous Post Author
      4 years ago

      yeah i am

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      • RoseIsabella
        4 years ago

        Well, honey, you need to continue to see the therapist, and stop seeing the loser, drug addict, too old for you, narcissistic abuser boyfriend!

        I'm dead serious, chica! Listen to me, and you will be alright. Quit messing with that sorry ass son of a bitch. For the love of God, just do the next right thing, girl!

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