bf cheated and i feel dumb for staying with him

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  • The flag for me is that he want's to be a Sugar Daddy with sexual interest in the ladies; and without your up front approval of that concept (and all that goes into it).

    That speaks of a mindset that is not supportive of a solid long term relationship.

    I know a lot about what goes on with these sites. I have been a real oddball on those because I was there (still am on 1 site) only to mentor Ladies who are looking for how to get ahead, without any expectation of sexual interest or contact (and I've had to say no many many times). I also get messages telling me that I'm on the wrong site. Key is my wife knows I'm there (and approved of my going back on those sites after I was married for what I do), knows of the good I have done, has met a number of the Ladies I have assisted to get ahead, etc. She even picked the pictures that I have used over the years.

    Anyway; I've heard from several thousand ladies over many years on what the normal range of SD-SB relationships are.

    My advice... Leave, and never look back. He has a lot of growing up to do to raise to your standards... and it's not likely to occur soon.

    I wish you the best with this,

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    • i’m just not sure why he wants to do this SD thing. he’s not even that rich. he’s 24. he owns a mediocre skateboard company but it isn’t huge. he still lives with his parents. just don’t get it

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      • You may never understand, and I'm not sure either (different men have different reasons)

        I do know that there can be a lot of "ego" satisfaction to being a SD... not to mention a wide variety of nice looking and very willing sex partners (which adds to the ego satisfaction of how good a "man" they are).

        I could easily have had 3 different ladies a week from any of the sites I was on without even trying (or doing more than buying a cup of coffee, etc.), if that was what I wanted. But, I'm extremely selective and how they think and act is far more important to me than their bodies; and I've always looked for demonstrated long term friends first for any intimate partner (I don't do hook-ups or flings).

        Again, I suggest that you move on. He might grow up some day, and he might not. Some habits are hard to break; and getting used to multiple readily available intimate partners can be a difficult one for most men to give up on.

        If you want a man who is poly or involved in multiple partners - you should have a say up front in that (and be able to set rules and expectations: Any decent man owes you that, and you owe a man the same if you desire others as well). Permission up front with rules does wonders and prevents all kinds of issues.

        Again, I wish you the best...

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