B**chiness = jealousy?

69% Normal
11 Comments

Hey. Well here's the issue: I think I'm jealous of my brother.
This sucks. I'm twenty, and I thought that I would be over these feelings, but I guess I'm not. I mean, my family (meaning my mom) treats me and my older bro differently. There is a clear double standard. For one, I can't be out past 6 o'clock. Think I'm kidding? Unfortunately it's true. But then, my bro can be out until 6 am, and my mom's not calling his phone every five minutes like she does for me. The thing that pisses me off the most is the fact that my bro doesn't have my back. I mean, whenever I try to tell my mom that I'm TWENTY and to stop treating me like a kid, my bro never backs me up. Which means that it's two against me. So, here I sit, yet again in my room like I did in high school resenting my brother. Am I mad at the wrong person? Am I totally lame for being jealous of my older bro? For feeling inferior to him? You tell me.

Voting Results
69% Normal
Based on 45 votes (31 yes)
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Comments ( 11 )
  • Ryuk5127
    11 years ago

    Wow... I thought MY life sucked

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  • [Old Memory]
    13 years ago

    your mad at ur brother cuz ur mom lets him do stuff, u should be mad at ur mom, plus ur twenty, jus do wat my siblings do and do watever u want anyway, but ull prolly get kicked out sooo yea, but you have to stand up for yourself

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  • Isolated
    13 years ago

    I think you're being a little over-sheltered by your mom. Since you're old enough, go live with a roommate or live alone some where else.

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  • tormentingambitions
    15 years ago

    This is a tough situation, but parents have double standards for various reasons. I'm the oldest of 2 and I do get treated differently; harshly in other words... You have every right to be angry about your situation. Most parents are very strict with their first child because they're still not sure about how this whole parenting thing works. Once parents see that their first child turned out okay, they are much more likely to be lenient with their other children. Not fair, I know. But hey, you're 20 and chances are, you won't be living with your parents forever. you'll soon enough move out and create your own rules. No need to deal with such inequalities!

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  • tormentingambitions
    15 years ago

    This is a tough situation, but parents have double standards for various reasons. I'm the oldest of 2 and I do get treated differently; harshly in other words.

    You have every right to be angry about your situation. Most parents are very strict with their first child because they're still not sure about how this whole parenting thing works. Once parents see that their first child turned out okay, they are much more likely to be lenient with their other children.

    Not fair, I know. But hey, you're 20 and chances are, you won't be living with your parents forever. you'll soon enough move out and create your own rules. No need to deal with such inequalities!

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  • lisha590
    15 years ago

    Thats drwlin sounds like ur mother wants to keep u "the baby" forever. Maybe u should move out.

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  • tornwithin
    15 years ago

    um u cant have a curfew your 20.. i had one til i was 19 and im an adult so she wasnt allowed to do that anymore and my latest curfew was midnight while everyone i knew could be out till when they wanted and thought my mom was a crazy bitch.. also i have 2 older bros they never had curfews or anything but im thinkin its cuz their guys and im a girl so she worries about me more but still get child services involved thats fuked up u can do what u want and they shouldnt do that be like fuck u dont talk to me! haha

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    • thewyrdest1
      15 years ago

      that's true but in my case, my mom is very traditional. so in her head, if i'm at home, then i have to follow her rules. i've kinda accepted that since i have to go home for vacations and stuff, but i'm sad that i have to do my thing when i'm not home. i'd rather feel like i have her approval to finally be an adult, then to have to sneak it. makes me feel like i'm doing something wrong. either way, i'm am an adult, so i'm going to enjoy my life and not let my mom to smother me. thanks for the advice =]. s.

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  • [Old Memory]
    15 years ago

    Yeah, I agree with DarkBloom.

    Since you're 20, I'm assuming you're looking to move out of there pretty soon. I'm 19 and am loking to dorm my 2nd year of college starting this summer/fall. There's only so much I can take in this house lol.

    Yeah, just focus on moving out, and then once you get your own apartment or dorm (if in college), then you won't have to worry about the rules at home and your bro.

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  • Darkbloom
    15 years ago

    It's true, your mother definitely has a double standard between you and your brother, and the fact that your brother doesn't back you up when you're treated unfairly means that he believes there's nothing wrong with it.

    Unfortunately, I doubt either of them will ever change. I know a woman in her early 30s that still lives with her parents and she has to be home by 8:00PM. But the important thing is that she CHOOSES to live with her parents and doesn't mind the curfew.

    There could be a thousand reasons why your mother and brother are the way they are - cultural, religious, etc. Don't worry about that. Start focusing on moving out! Start saving up your money, looking for an apartment, finding a roommate, and a steady job. Independence is scary at first, but totally worth it (just stay responsible)!

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  • jessicia16
    13 years ago

    your TWENTY YEARS OLD! ? oh my god .. im 16 ~ your really living in a patheticly childish existance ~ hmmmmm get a backbone ? there is no polite way to say that ... but your a man right ? for many years now... why would you ever be following rules from a mother ? you will be like a servant husband one day i bet... yes dear, sorry dear , its quite sad

    no wonder im always more attracted to older guys.. it seems all the guys under age 30 are like little boys ... i dont even know if that story is fake but your mother wont let you stay out after 6pm ?? and your a man! @_@ haha ... try telling her to mind her own business and go get your own life where you dont need permission from your mother to stay out after dinner time :P

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