LOL. I have a ton of chick friends that get with assholes with criminal records or children that they don't support when they have plenty of good-looking, kind-hearted male friends that they could, for lack of better way to put it, have their pick of.
What sucks is that I know that when they are older and have their priorities together (they realize that a man that can provide them with drama and excitement isn't nearly as valuable as a man that can provide them with stability and be a good father and partner), they wish they would have gotten with the good men. It's usually too late though, most of these guys are married by the time the women realize that they missed a golden oppurtunity. Sorry, ladies. You put him back on the shelf, he was free game :P
Agreed. It is a shame, it means that becuase there isn't a proper family enviroment, the child could either be brought up by a single mother, or a father that doesn't deserve to be called a father.
I don't know if I am completely accurate in saying this but it seems like the problem is more prominent nowadays then it was 30-40 years ago. I've been told that as women gain more economic "independance" (real or perceived) or become more "independant" of males ("I'm a strong female, I don't need a man in my life"), the prevalence of single-motherhood becomes more and more so.
It saddens me. I know some really cool women that get tangled up with these nasty dudes and have kids with them and I know it hurts the men that actually care for them too =/
I think it's reasonable to believe that, I don't know if that would be the only reason, but I think it's definetly part of the reason.
I think maybe the thought is "I'm a capable woman, I can bring my child up by myself" but forget that it isn't about the woman, it isn't how she thinks she shjould bring up the child, it's about the child, that the child would be better being brought up by two parents for financial and emotional support.
It is a shame, I feel sorry for the child in those situations aswell.
I think there are many healthy single-parent households, though yes having two can, ideally, make it more stable.
As for the independence thought, I think it has come in conjunction with the trend for women to focus on education and job security more in their twenties, and thus getting married/having kids at a later age. Remember, men have always been pushed into business & work at that age, then marry a few years later. Marriage used to be THE defining factor of a woman - who did she marry, what is his job and his income? A bachelor we more socially acceptable (& still is to an extent) than a spinster.
That's the key here. If this recent explosion of popular gang culture has proven anything, it is that children NEED strong, positive male role models. The only word I can think of for these women is selfish, many of them relish not having to relinquish their parental control to a man, but they don't realize that it's not about "ME and MY feelings". What a crock.
*edit* So if a woman is single and has a child, do you feel that only a male partner could fill that purpose as that role model, or would a grandfather, uncle or male friend provide it equally well?
I think any good male would fill the void quite well, but often times even those good males are not there. Many of these women just lack good male role models in their lives, hence why I say that they are so important.
Are men trustworthy?
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LOL. I have a ton of chick friends that get with assholes with criminal records or children that they don't support when they have plenty of good-looking, kind-hearted male friends that they could, for lack of better way to put it, have their pick of.
What sucks is that I know that when they are older and have their priorities together (they realize that a man that can provide them with drama and excitement isn't nearly as valuable as a man that can provide them with stability and be a good father and partner), they wish they would have gotten with the good men. It's usually too late though, most of these guys are married by the time the women realize that they missed a golden oppurtunity. Sorry, ladies. You put him back on the shelf, he was free game :P
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Agreed. It is a shame, it means that becuase there isn't a proper family enviroment, the child could either be brought up by a single mother, or a father that doesn't deserve to be called a father.
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NeuroNeptunian
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I don't know if I am completely accurate in saying this but it seems like the problem is more prominent nowadays then it was 30-40 years ago. I've been told that as women gain more economic "independance" (real or perceived) or become more "independant" of males ("I'm a strong female, I don't need a man in my life"), the prevalence of single-motherhood becomes more and more so.
It saddens me. I know some really cool women that get tangled up with these nasty dudes and have kids with them and I know it hurts the men that actually care for them too =/
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I think it's reasonable to believe that, I don't know if that would be the only reason, but I think it's definetly part of the reason.
I think maybe the thought is "I'm a capable woman, I can bring my child up by myself" but forget that it isn't about the woman, it isn't how she thinks she shjould bring up the child, it's about the child, that the child would be better being brought up by two parents for financial and emotional support.
It is a shame, I feel sorry for the child in those situations aswell.
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NeuroNeptunian
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I think there are many healthy single-parent households, though yes having two can, ideally, make it more stable.
As for the independence thought, I think it has come in conjunction with the trend for women to focus on education and job security more in their twenties, and thus getting married/having kids at a later age. Remember, men have always been pushed into business & work at that age, then marry a few years later. Marriage used to be THE defining factor of a woman - who did she marry, what is his job and his income? A bachelor we more socially acceptable (& still is to an extent) than a spinster.
"but forget that it isn't about the woman"
That's the key here. If this recent explosion of popular gang culture has proven anything, it is that children NEED strong, positive male role models. The only word I can think of for these women is selfish, many of them relish not having to relinquish their parental control to a man, but they don't realize that it's not about "ME and MY feelings". What a crock.
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*edit* So if a woman is single and has a child, do you feel that only a male partner could fill that purpose as that role model, or would a grandfather, uncle or male friend provide it equally well?
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I think any good male would fill the void quite well, but often times even those good males are not there. Many of these women just lack good male role models in their lives, hence why I say that they are so important.